For today’s blog, I’m just going to share a bunch of random gibberish.

  1. One time my best friend, Ava, was at my house and my mom made us blueberry smoothies and she spilled it on the couch, the floor, and my dog. We got some hand towels and started wiping it up and got most of it off the couch and floor when I got a op and started mopping the couch and floor. Then my dog walked over covered in smoothie. I looked at the dog. I looked at Ava. I looked back at the dog. I mopped the dog.
  2. If you have an Amazon alexa, ask it to fart.
  3. My brother’s dog, Napoleon, is a little pig. When we feed the dogs he keeps eating the other dog, Roo’s food. One time my mom caught him doing that and she yelled, “Napoleon you fat f*** quit eating Roo’s food!”
  4. I was talking to my mom about Napoleon and I said “he’s a good boy” and my mom replied “did you say he’s a pillsbury doughboy”
  5. When I was younger I used to hiss at my brother and his friends. I was really weird. They were scared of me. They were 2-4 years older than me.
  6. I was sitting in the kitchen and my brother walked in and looked at me and said “I remember when I caught you eating that stick of butter.” I was like 6 and really liked eating butter. Apparently I had asked my mom to eat some butter and she said no and then went outside. I was alone in the kitchen. I opened the fridge, dragged a chair over, opened the butter penthouse, took a stick of butter, unwrapped it, and started eating it when my brother came into the kitchen and found me eating straight butter. If you’ve seen that girl on tiktok who puts like sriracha sauce on butter and eats it, that was me. Minus the sauce.
  7. When I was about five, me, my mom, my brother, my brothers friend, and her mom went to this pizza place and while the moms were still inside paying and talking before we left, Thomas (my brother), Holly (his friend), and I went outside to Holly’s moms car and got in it and were playing around. Our moms were inside talking to the staff people for a good 15-20 minutes so we had some time to make some trouble. Note 1: None of us could drive yet. Note 2: We didn’t want to actually kill anyone. Note 3: We had access to a car and the keys. You may be thinking “Oh god they drove off and killed someone” Close but no. Thomas and Holly came up with this brilliant idea. I hid in the trunk of the car (it was an SUV so the trunk was open to the rest of the car) . Thomas was walking in front of the car as if he was crossing the street. Holly was fake driving the car. We had an amazing opportunity. We ran into the store and dragged out our moms to act out our play. I got in the trunk, Holly got into the driver seat, and Thomas positioned himself outside the car. Holly says “Y’all ready?” Thomas and I yell yes. Holly starts humming (we had all the windows down so our moms could hear everything) Thomas starts walking in front of the car talking about how it’s a beautiful day. Holly goes “Oh no! A person! *BANG*” and Thomas fake falls as if he’s been hit by a car. Holly says “OH-” I stay silent. Holly says, “I said OH-” I stay silent. Thomas stays dead. Holly says, “GEORGIA” and I said “oh, SH**!” and our moms died laughing. Holly wasn’t allowed to curse so she had me do it for her.

Author: Georgia Bailey

I was born in Colorado and moved to Mississippi in 2008. I like reading pretty much every type of book except for romance. My family consists of me, my mom, my brother, my dog, and my brothers dog.

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