See you later, MSA!

Agh! I can’t believe junior is already almost over; I swear it was like yesterday we were all outside ringing the bell. This is my last post for the school year which means that the next time you hear from me, I will be a senior(that’s a slightly scary thought). For my last post, I will do a self reflection of how I’ve grown as a person and a writer. This is is simply a long, boring paragraph of how much I have changed as a person for the better and as a writer and artist. If upcoming juniors ever read this post, I would hope this could relieve some of that anxiety that comes with moving into a completely new learning and living environment. Anyways, without further ado, please enjoy.

Ever since kindergarten, I have attended North Pike which, if y’all don’t know, is a very big school and not the best place to be(I won’t get into details). One of the things I will say though is that I was always self conscious about certain things, including how I was around friends and my style of clothing(to name only a couple). The students at my old school were in general just not the best people to be around and it was especially difficult for someone who really  loves art and reading like me because of course that was considered very weird. When I started coming here, I deeply appreciated how weird was the normal and that different kinds of weird were welcome and embraced. One of my biggest worries was that I wasn’t gonna be able to make any new friends, but that was changed quite literally on day one. Throughout the year, I gradually became a more outgoing person although I still consider myself very ambiverted. I was not at all the kind of person to spend her days going out just doing whatever and to this day that is still not my go-to thing but if invited by friends, I’ll be more than willing to go and have fun. I like to think that I also became a more assertive person since attending here the details of why that is are some that I’d like to not share, but you get the general idea. 

As a writer, I used be very meticulous in my writing, meaning I paid close attention to adding vivid descriptions and image and I am glad to say I have been good at that, but the overall plot and theme and other essential writing elements  weren’t quite as strong. I have gotten a lot better at it since coming here and learning to balance out the amount of imagery inclusion of plot and theme. I also liked that I have been able to learn about and write stories, poems, etc. in different formats in styles. I had some favorites of course, but it fun in general exploring those different writing styles. The process of workshop and revision is also extremely helpful because it’s where you can gather what impact its made on readers and they can give positive feedback and critique based on what you wanted them to gain and experience through your writing. There are incidents and projects(such as coffeehouse, Poetry Out Loud, podcasting, etc.) that also have taken me far out of my comfort zone and, I will be 100% honest, I really didn’t like at first but they have overall helped me for the better. This experience that I have had so far makes me very hopeful for my senior year and I am excited for it.

That is all I have to day about my journey so far, and I do hope to grow even more as a writer and person throughout my upcoming senior year. It’s a little scary but also very exciting. I hope you have enjoyed this, and I will see you later, MSA<3

End of The Year Blog

     Hey guys!!! This is my very last blog of the YEAR! For the last blog I thought I would do sort of a recap of the year and tell you guys things I’ve learned what I would or would not do again, talk about the friends that I have made, my plans for next year, how I’ll decorate my room, etc. Okay so let’s get into it. Oh my gosh y’all first and foremost I will be a SENIOR in high school next year. TIME IS MOVING SO FAST. I’m ready but I’m not ready. This is so bittersweet. The juniors next year will be looking up to us to help them and that’s kind of scary honestly. I’ve loved everything about MSA since I’ve been here and I feel like I’ll love it even more next year. The first day I got here I was building stuff, unpacking clothes and saying goodbye to my family members. I never imagined I would change this much in less than a year.

     My style is so different. I’ve always worn black but I like my clothes way bigger than I used to. I feel like I’ve grown so much more confident in myself and my body. I used to only wear like tight clothing. Not for attention but because that’s what other girls would wear and I thought it was what I should wear too. Now I only care about what I want for myself and how I feel about me. I’ve always been independent and haven’t let other have too much influence over me but in the back of my mind I wanted to be like those other girls and now I only want to be me. I’ve made so many fantastic friends here. My roommate is so special to me and it’s crazy to think that I didn’t even know her when we got here. We originally met on instagram like 2 days before our official move-in day and she was not my original roommate. I used to room with my friend from my hometown and old school and I moved in with Shakeera in September. We’re polar opposites yet exactly the same. We have so much fun together, there is never a dull moment, and I’m so grateful that we were brought together. My suite mates Asia and Kaydence are some great friends I’ve made as well, they have great taste in music we always have dance parties in the bathroom and do each other’s hair and makeup. My entire suite is simply a vibe. Ronada is another friend. We always laugh when we’re together and if one of us dances the other has to dance too. I have loved dying her hair this year. SHE HAS AMAZING HAIR. That reminds me earlier this year Shakeera and I bleached our roots blonde and kept the ends of our hair pink and twinned for a while, it was so cute.

     My passion for writing and becoming a published writer has flourished tremendously. I’ve seen my fellow literaries accomplish some things that I want for myself and this school has shed light on so many competitions, and writing camps that I can attend and I plan to take part in each one. There were so many things about writing I had no idea about. Haibuns, abecedarians, kwansaba’s and so many others. My teacher is amazing and I can’t thank her enough for pushing me and my peers through this year as I thought I couldn’t finish so many of the assignments she gave us. My plans for next year are to apply for as many colleges and scholarships as I possibly can so that I have money to work with and options to choose from. I want to major in creative writing and probably minor in something such as English or psychology.

      Next year Shakeera and I plan to decorate our room with a hippie theme. You know all different sorts of colors, patterns, and designs. The bathroom will be more of a earthy, plant vibe. I can’t wait to see what the summer has in store for me and what next year brings.

PEACE OUT!

I LOVE YOU GUYS (mwah)

an ode to goodbyes

when i first arrived at msa, i knew only a couple seniors and my roommate. during the first week, i felt so alone and could barely keep myself together. i wanted to go home. i called my mom and told her i had no friends, and i didn’t want to be here anymore. she simply told me to go out and at least try before coming home. so i did. during the water park trip at the beginning of the year, i went out and tried my best to talk to people- and that’s how i met some of my closest friends. others reached out to me on social media, and we quickly became close. others have been by my side since the summer. this blog is dedicated to them, as each one will be leaving. i love all of you, and remember to stay in touch:)


an ode to locklyn:

locklyn, you are one of my favorite people on the planet. we met over the summer and immediately had a connection. i enjoyed talking to you so much, and i was so excited to have a friend. when i moved in, i was awkward and nervous, but being around you helped me so much. despite my disposition, you wanted to hang out with me and you loved being my friend- something that helped me value myself more. we have had so many moments together that i can’t even have a favorite. every second spent with you is enjoyable, and i’m so glad that we met. music is one thing we have connected between us, and i cherish that so much. you got me into slipknot, and i got you into elliott smith. you’re the jonathan davis to my fred durst. i’m so excited to see you at ole miss and hopefully live with you there too !! stay cool, and always remember to damn the man. i love you!

song dedicated to you: lover, you should’ve come over by jeff buckley

an ode to cain:

cain, i would have never guessed that we would become friends. which doesn’t make sense, really. i followed you before i moved in, but when i first saw you, i didn’t say a single word. it wasn’t until the water park trip that i even said hi to you. then, suddenly, we became close. ever since then, we continue to get closer and closer. anytime i see you, my day is brightened. i genuinely love you so much. sometimes you can be a little silly and do little stupid silly things, but it doesn’t make me love you any less. one of my favorite moments with you dates back to artoberfest where you gave me the biggest bruise of my life. you roughed me up so bad, but because it was you, i didn’t mind. my arm still shivers when i get near you. other moments include watching you laugh so hard over your own story, every time you’ve ever yelled super loudly in public (as much as i hated it), and the long talks we’ve had on the swings outside. you’ve been there for me since day one, and i will continue to be there for you. i’m so excited to see you over the summer. stay awesome, cain:)

song dedicated to you: alameda by elliott smith

an ode to emma:

emma, my dearest roommate. i surprisingly don’t have many photos of us together, but i like to think it’s because we’re too busy making awful jokes to notice. i met you towards the beginning of the year, and i instantly knew that we had so much in common. like, a scary amount in common. when i got the news that my roommate was leaving in december, you were the first person i messaged. i’m so glad i did that, because now i have the best roommate anyone could ever ask for. seeing you walk into the room instantly makes me so happy. there is never a dull moment when we are both in the room. even when i’m not feeling well, you never fail to make me laugh. i will forever miss walking into the room and hearing you instantly have something to tell me, or almost being asleep and then hearing you absolutely laugh your ass off- immediately sending me whatever it is you’re looking at. you’re so talented and i’m absolutely so excited to see what your future holds. you’re one of my closest friends and an excellent singer of the wishing tree song from south park. have a great summer, emma:)

song dedicated to you: needles and pins by jackie deshannon

an ode to kameron:

kameron. we don’t have a single photo together, which is crazy because you are genuinely one of my closest friends of all time. you followed me over the summer, and i followed you back after some time. when i moved in, i didn’t connect you to the account i had been following. all i knew was you seemed super cool and i desperately wanted to be your friend. i remember posting something on my story about wanting new friends and after about thirty minutes, you messaged me. it was an awkward start simply sharing music, but it turned into one of my most cherished friendships of all time. we have talked to each other almost every single day of this school year with no breaks. i introduced you to elliott smith, and you got me into what is now one of my favorite manga series of all time (goodnight punpun). punpun became a huge part of our friendship, and now all your drawings of him that you have gifted me are on display in my room at home:) i genuinely have never had such a kind and caring friend like you, and i know neither of us will let our friendship die out. i can’t wait to see you over the summer (hopefully we can actually communicate like real human beings). stay cool kameron, and yes, you do look like will toledo.

song dedicated to you: there must be more than blood by car seat headrest


if you aren’t featured here, please do know that i still love you and care about you. this blog is dedicated to the people who have made the most impact on my life. there are still so many others that i love and am so grateful for. with that being said, here’s to the year of 22′-23′, and here’s to the people that got me through it. i’m endlessly thankful for you all. see you later:)<3

signing out,

erin.

My favorite music to write to

Some of us like to listen to music as we write, so I figured I would list some of my personal favorites. Music tends to distract me sometimes when I am trying to do something. Certain artists and songs help but a lot do not help me. I’m going to have 3 bands in here and 2 songs.

Artists

  1. The Neighborhood

There is quite an obvious theme residing in these bands and songs if you are familiar with the ones I chose. The Neighborhood is very relaxing for me and I can focus well while listening to their music because there aren’t a lot of noises involved or fast pace. When the songs are too fast paced I cant keep up with both the music and writing.

  1. Cigarettes after sex

This one is on here for the same reason as the previous artist listed. Very slow, calm, and quiet. I find those 2 bands quite similar in many aspects. They both bring the perfect energy and amount of focus to my writing zone.

  1. Mitski

Mitski has some songs in a fast pace, but I can still use them to focus with in my writing. She has a very soft singing voice which is perfect for the atmosphere I try to create during writing.

The songs

  1. Jealous- Eyedress
  2. Spit in my face- ThxSoMch

I’m talking about both songs at once because everything I say can correlate to both. Both songs have a nice rhythm that I love hearing. They contribute to my stories every time I write. Sometimes I like to play songs I feel would fit into the movie version of my stories and they often contribute. As well as the piano solo Clare De Lune.

Why don’t I like writing to music?

I mentioned in the blog that I did not really like listening to music while I write. I have a few reasons why, but the main thing is that I can’t focus on both. When fast or loud music is played in headphones or out loud I can focus on my writing. If the music is softer and slower I can. I also don’t like it very much because it will sometimes give me ideas for the story. Now, this is fine and helpful until you are almost done with the story and decide the ending and plot should be reworked because of one song lyric. 

Ranking My Favorite Ninja Turtles

This will be my last blog, so in order to (kind of) celebrate I’m going to be writing about my current hyper fixation: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. I’m going to have fun and rank my favorite ninja turtles. I won’t be looking at any specific shows or renditions, instead I’ll be judging them by their over character.

 

Mikey

Mikey is a fun-loving dude. He’s the team goof ball and general party guy. I like him due to his silliness. He always breaks the tension and chooses to have fun rather than try to remain serious like his brothers. Despite his silliness he is the most naturally gifted in fighting out of his brothers.

Donnie

Donnie is the genius of the group. His inventions often aid him and his brothers, although sometimes they wind up getting the team into trouble. He usually is very nerdy and displays the calmest personality of the four brothers. I enjoy how much of a nerd he can be, as well as how he uses his intelligence rather than simply his strength to win a fight.

Leo

Leo is the leader of the team. Often times he is the most mature and most serious out of his brothers. Leo is a character that I will either love or hate. In some renditions, I find his character quite compelling and interesting, while in others I find him to be annoying. I find that I most like him when he is having trouble with the responsibility of his leadership role. He is a kid after all, and his need to look after his brothers conflicting with him only being a teenager is very interesting to me. However, in some renditions being “the leader” is his entire personality and he can become whiny and controlling.

Raph

Raph is the tough, hotheaded brute of the team. I feel bad for putting him at the bottom of the list, but it’s only because he usually is the one to cause conflict. Raph is notorious for having some sort of rival with Leo due to him hating authority and having to listen to his brother. I like seeing Leo and Raph have their rivalry as long as it is written well, but sometimes seeing them fight can be annoying. Same goes for Raph’s anger. His anger is a large part of his character and I like to see it explored; however, his angry outburst can seem random and unjustified.

What inspires my writing

For this weeks blog I decided to write about who, what, where, and everything else impacts my writing. I think I write about a wide variety of themes and plot lines. I thought you may be interested in seeing where they all come from. 

Mental Health

I commonly use the topic of mental health in my writing because it is one of a few things I can strike a passion for. I love forming a character to represent this illness. I also really enjoy getting to research the mental illnesses I write about. I obviously try to do extensive research before writing the story. There is so much to be aware of in the area of mental health, and I feel like I can show that through my stories. 

Societal issues

This is another subject I am passionate about. When it comes down to sexism, racism, or just hate in society in general I feel like I have to write about it. Societal problems strike a special anger for me, but I can vent that onto a piece of paper. I feel like there are so many places society as a whole still needs to improve in. 

Specifically teenage mental health/issues

It gets technical here, but this is my favorite subject matter to write on. Teenagers do not get heard a lot of the time when it comes to their mental health, or what people call “teenage drama” can be serious in the eyes of the teenager. I have a specific, festering passion for this subject. I could go on and on about why I like writing about this topic. 

Lighting and sound

This is not a topic I like to write about, but my setting. Certain areas I can be more or less productive. I like it to be in my own personal area, but that does not always mean my room. Take our classroom for example (3rd block). I sit on the almost end of our table but I am not shoulder to shoulder with anyone. I have enough of my own space to feel like I am in my personal area. My room is the ideal place of course. I like for the lights to be dim. I usually sit at my desk with the lava lamp on my desk, and my roommates lamp on on the other side of the room. I like to have 2 sounds going (not at the same time). I either like to hear white noise while I write, or music. It depends usually. If one doesn’t work I will swap to the other. I like my room freezing at all times, so I can bundle into a blanket. Comfy and cozy. 

 

guardians of the galaxy 3 review/thoughts

oh dear god.


i have been the biggest fan of the guardians of the galaxy series since the very first one came out. i’ve seen each movie in theaters within two days of it coming out. i love it. i’ve also seen the specials (i love them as well). so obviously when i found out that the last one would be coming out, i was destroyed but excited. i love james gunn- he is one of my favorite directors, and he never lets me down. i knew i would love the third installment, but i didn’t realize the extent of the affect it would have on me. not only do i think it is my favorite movie in the series, but for the past couple of days, it has completely changed my way of thinking and made me so emotional. it might just be because of the point in the month, but i have been sobbing everyday since seeing it. ya’ll, when i watched it, i wanted to bang my head against the wall until it exploded. i genuinely could not take it. i’m very sensitive to harm towards animals, so this movie really got to me. my favorite character has always been rocket, so i was especially interested in this movie. it wasn’t until after my mom told me that she sobbed during it that i debated even going to see it in theaters. but of course i couldn’t break the streak, so i went with a couple friends. don’t do that. i held back tears for the sake of saving face- and now i’m going to go watch it again with my boyfriend, and i will not be holding back a single damn emotion. i grew so attached to these sweet characters just to- i won’t spoil it, but it gets super dark and super depressing. you will cry. you will sob. and then at the end you’ll attempt to smile as florence + the machine plays but inside you will be sobbing. 10/10 movie, 10/10 series.

it’s great to have friends.


My Favorite Foods

Hey guys, I am producing yet another blog, only one left after this. Since last week I did my least favorite foods, this week I’ll do my favorite foods. There aren’t the healthiest, and I don’t even know if some of these are even considered foods, but these are just foods I don’t think I would be able to live without.

  1. Bacon 

Yes, it’s greasy and has fat and it’s unhealthy but I put it on everything, burgers, baked potatoes, omelets, and anything else I can think of. It’s so crunchy, and the flavor is out of this world. You can season bacon, but you really don’t have to do anything, and it still tastes so good. It’s also really easy to make. 

  1. Pasta 

This is like a wide variety of things. I love any type of pasta and my mom tells me I eat too many carbs, but I don’t care. Macaroni, rotini, farfalle, ziti, penne, and fettucine, I eat it all. I like spaghetti, alfredo’s, and any other pasta bakes. 

  1. Cheese 

I think this may be my favorite item in the list. Cheese is everything to me. I PUT IT ON EVERYTHING! I put it on sandwiches, pasta, burgers, baked potatoes, chicken strips, and anything else I can put it on. I feel bad for people who are lactose intolerant because I love dairy products. 

  1. Pickles  

I’ve loved pickles all my life. I only eat sour and hot ones. They’re so good and I always put pickle salt on them. I eat so many sometimes I have to take a break and let my body rest but when I eat them, I eat multiple a day. They are so good, especially if they’re juicy and crunchy. I love pickles. My favorite brand is Best Maid, and you can only find them in select gas stations, which is kind of sad, but they also sell them at Wilson’s Meat Market in my city. 

  1. Mayonnaise 

This is really the only condiment I like for real besides barbeque sauce and Polynesian sauce. It’s so thick and smooth and it goes on literally anything. Sometimes I put it on bread and just eat it by itself. It has a little bit of a tangy taste but it’s not sour nor is it sweet and that’s what I like about it. It’s the perfect neutral condiment to put on any food. 

That’s all for this week, see you later! 

Love Hypothesis pt 2

Last week I started talking about some characters from a book I have recently finished reading called The Love Hypothesis and of course this is a continuation of that since I only did two of the characters so far. I said that I was gonna talk about Olive and Malcom for this post but I think I’m gonna switch it up a bit(adding more characters). This will likely also contain spoilers from the book so proceed with caution if you haven’t read it yet and you would like to.

Olive Smith

Olive is indeed the main character of the book and it would seem that she’d be the very first one I talk about before anyone else, but I really wanted to talk about Adam and Tom. Anyways, Olive is the sunshine in the grumpyXsunshine trope in the book and she definitely lives up to that “role” very well and she is a very lighthearted and kind person. The book does dive very deep into her character, though. It breaks down why she does what she does for her best friend and it also explains why she is in Stanford to become a scientist primarily in biology- to develop a possible cure for pancreatic cancer(it goes so much deeper than that, but I’ll leave that part for y’all to read if you wish to). As lighthearted and kind as she is, she is also very much an overthinker(something I relate to a little too well) and she has a lot of self-doubt and is one of those people that couldn’t think of a single thing about herself that someone else could like about her when in reality there isn’t anything that someone wouldn’t like about her. And I absolutely love how much of a selfless person she is.

Malcom (don’t remember his last name)

Let me start off by saying that we all need a Malcom in our lives. He is one of Olive’s best friends/roommate and quite honestly one of the best friends anyone could ask for. Since he and Olive are so close, he knows very well of the various struggles she goes through and is there for her in every way he knows he can be and always finds ways to cheer her up. Now, he does not like Adam whatsoever because he was overly critical of a paper that Malcom had submitted, but he set those past feelings aside after finding out that he and Olive are fake dating and why they are. He also becomes genuinely supportive when Olive tells him she’s developing real feelings for Adam. At the end of the book, Adam and Malcom end up getting along. I honestly love Malcom so much and feel he very much deserved the happy relationship he gets into towards the end of the book.

Anh (also don’t remember her last name)

Okay, if I am being totally honest, I found Anh to be slightly annoying but she is a really good friend to Olive(I feel like most of us have one of those people in our lives that we love so much but have to fight the urge to smack them upside the head). Anh is the reason why Olive and Adam are fake dating. How, what’d she do? She didn’t necessarily do anything, but she fell in love with Olive’s ex, Jeremy, but refused to pursue him even after Olive has told her many, many times that she is completely over him and she is okay with it, which she genuinely is because she and Jeremy weren’t that serious anyway and it was a short relationship. Anh finally decides to go out with him when she sees that Olive is “dating” Adam and has really moved on. She is also the friend that first detected that there were some real feelings on both sides. The reason I found her a little annoying is that she kept putting Olive in very awkward situations but I can’t really be upset because she didn’t know that it was fake.

Holden Rodrigues 

Last one and one of the most likeable characters. He’s funny, charming, loyal, and a genuinely good friend to Adam. Adam and Holden have bee best friends since childhood and have been there for each other when each were in touch situations. He also became a good friend to Olive as well, he was the one that first told her that Adam liked her for years. As I read more about Holden, the more I saw that he was kind of conflicted about Adam being friends with Tom because he had suspected that Tom wasn’t a real friend but he put off saying too much about it because he felt that he may have been too protective and maybe even jealous, but he knew something was off. Honestly, I can kind of relate to him because I have had friends who were hanging with toxic people but I didn’t say anything because I didn’t want to seem like a bad friend and didn’t want to start anything that was unnecessary in case I was wrong. But, of course, Holden was right about Tom.

That’s it, I have pretty much said everything I wanted about the characters. The Love Hypothesis is a really good and fun book and I really recommend it. But, of course, if it’s not your cup of tea, that’s completely understandable. I hope you have enjoyed this and I will see you again next week for the last time *sadness* </3

TERRIBLE EATS

Hi, my faithful readers, hope you guys are doing well, I’m not. Anyways today’s blog is going to be my least favorite foods, well scratch that the foods that I absolutely hate. Broooo these are disgusting and ridiculous and DO NOT try to come in the comments defending any of these because I only tolerate food slander over here not praise lol.Okay I’ll probably do about 5 foods depending on how much I rant about each one but yea around 5. 

  1. TOMATOES 

THEY SUCK! I don’t care bro there is no way you can defend these squishy, slimy, stinky, little things. They’re red and I don’t particularly love red things, and that little vine is usually pretty hairy which feels weird and sometimes almost cuts you. They rot really fast and they’re too sweet to be as acidic as they are. I know all this about them because I usually cook food when I’m at work and tomatoes happen to be one of the fruits/vegetables that I have to cut up and deal with. 

  1. MUSTARD 

Yet another disgusting thing. I don’t really know if this counts as food because it’s technically a condiment but whatever I’m going to include it. It’s sour and when you squirt it out of the bottle it has that water stuff that comes out unless you shake it really well. It stinks and it’s in a big yellow bottle which is very much unappealing. 

  1. LETTUCE 

Lettuce has got to be the nastiest thing I’ve ever tasted. I can’t decide if Iceberg lettuce or that pre-packaged spring mix is worse. Both of them suck so bad. Lettuce has gotten harder and harder over the years, and it is just a really unnecessary food. It feels like I’m chewing on plastic, I can never seem to finish chewing and swallow, so I end up choking. Most of the lettuce isn’t even green, it’s white, super thick, and nasty. 

  1. STEAK 

It’s touch, fatty, and it takes an entire week sometimes more to digest. It’s one of those foods that I don’t like just because they aren’t good for you. I don’t like the smell, and I just don’t get the point of them. Most people see them as high class or pricey foods, but they seem like regular old scraps to me. 

  1. CHITTERLINGS 

They stink so bad; they’ll have your house smelling like pigs for weeks. They are super hard to clean. They are all the unused and leftover parts of the pigs such as intestines. They are so disgusting and it’s like grinding your teeth against a Ziploc bag all day. I suggest you never try them. 

Anyways, that’s all for today folks see ya next week!