Category: Good Reads

John Merrick, known under another name, “The Elephant Man” is the starring protagonist in many a media today. As of now, there is a Broadway play (That David Bowie starred in??), a book, and a movie. In this post, I’ll be talking about the movie.

There are so many things I’d love to talk about in this movie. I only just watched it the other day but I’m already obsessed. It expands upon so many hidden issues. Hidden is an ironic word in this case, given John Merrick’s condition. 

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A quick synopsis:

The Elephant Man is an unfortunate story about a man born with “Proteus syndrome”
A rare condition that affects the growth of tissue, bones, organs, and skin. It enlarges them abnormally. It can cause extreme pain. It can also disfigure the face, like John Merrick’s

One man, The Circus man, takes interest in his appearance and uses him in his “Freak Show” for the circus.
Not only was he not paid, but he was also forced to live in awful living conditions.
A Doctor of Anatomy, Dr Fredrick Treeves, takes him away to the hospital. In the hospital, he’s given food, water, a warm bed, and much more. 

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One thing that kept coming to mind as I watched the movie, was how… no matter what environment he was in, John Merrick was always being observed. From the circus to the ending scenes where he was being applauded, he was always the center of attention, which he most definitely did not want.

In the beginning, he was observed in the circus and onlookers who found his appearance strange and frightening.

Then he was displayed in front of scholars and doctors. Doctor Treeves, as hospitable as he might have been, was still only doing what the circus man did. Just in a different lighting. |

The security guard in the hospital would often sneak those who paid enough into the hospital to take a look at John. This eventually led to the circus man coming back and kidnapping John from his new home. In the picture below, he is being held against his will and displayed to people outside the window.
This scene was very traumatic, It was hard to tell if John was limp from shock, or maybe, as a defense mechanism, he just tuned everything out, trying to wait for it to pass. The scene gets more graphic as they force John and one of the women to kiss.

(I hate this security guard with a burning hell fire passion.)

Near the end of the movie, John and his friends go to a play, he was absolutely in love with it. But at the end, his actor friend came out and claimed to dedicate the show to him. This did nothing but put him in front of the audience again. He was once again displayed in front of everyone. Only under different light. 

What hurts, is that he only stood because the Doctor told him too. from the looks of it, he didn’t like being the center of attention, even positive attention.
Throughout the movie, it seems like he has been nothing but a tool for attention. Whether to make money off of it or to put nobles in a better light for being in his company. And yes, they do treat him well, but It feels more like an exchange, rather than goodwill at times.

The Beautiful thing about John Merrick though, is that… throughout the movie, he found beauty all around him. He found so much beauty in the world and showed so much appreciation and wonder. When invited to the doctor’s house for tea, he saw the pictures over the mantle piece and was absolutely star-struck at the beauty of not only how it was arranged, but also of the pictures of the beautiful children and relatives. 

In the beginning, Doctor Treeves tries to prepare John for an interview. He tries to get John to memorize a Psalm from the Bible. At this point in the movie, it was assumed that John Merrick was unintelligible and illerat. This was excruciatingly false. Doctor Treeves brought in his director, who would be the one conducting the interview. John had been very nervous and stumbled over his words that he already had trouble enunciating. 


The Director politely leaves, talking to the Doctor outside. He had seen through the facade. However, John started reciting more than what he was taught from behind the door. It caught the attention of the Docter, “I hadn’t taught him that part” He said. When asked how he knew the rest of the Pslam, John said that it was his favorite and that he thought it was very beautiful.  

Near the end of the movie, an actress comes to his room, giving him a framed photo of herself John takes it, saying he needs to set it in a place of honor. He places it right next to a framed photo of his missing mother that lies on his bedside.

The point of what I’m saying is… Even in a world that looks upon him as if he is a monster, John Merrick finds the beauty in everything, and appreciates everything. I think one scene in this movie could sum up every moral that it told throughout the two-hour film. 

—–

Throughout the entire film, after he is brought to the hospital, we watch as John builds a cathedral out of boxes and other materials. He uses the cathedral out of his window as a reference. However, he can only see the very top, so he has to imagine the rest.

THIS PART DUDE!!!

HE CAN ONLY SEE THE SURFACE, THE VERY TIP OF THE ICEBERG IF YOU WILL, BUT HE DOESN’T STOP OR JUDGE IT, HE WANT’S TO LEARN MORE ABOUT IT AND EXPLORE IT, AND GUHH!!!




This part sums up that we shouldn’t look at the tip of the iceberg and think we know everything. We shouldn’t call it quits and think we have the whole idea from just looking at the surface. We need to have an unbiased curiosity. A genuine intrest in people. 

I love this movie so much, I would strongly encourage everyone to watch it. Yes it’s filmed in black and white, but I think that helps with the atmosphere and time of the film. The story is filled with such detail and so much depth that I can’t help but watch it again. 

(p.s)
I just wanted to add a small bit about my favorite scene. After being kidnapped by the circus man, he escapes and runs away with the help of his friends who had also been titled “Freaks.”

He rides a boat and eventually finds himself at a train station. Where a series of events leads to him being chased into the men’s bathroom. Where he is crowded and surrounded by everyone, where he is once again on display for everyone to see. In the most desperate voice, that almost made me cry, he shouted,

 

Heres the Link to a Youtube Clip

“NO!”
“I AM NOT AN ANIMAL”
“I AM NOT AN ANIMAL”
“I AM A HUMAN BEING”

With shocked faces, the men look amongst themselves, then John faints, eventually taken by the police, and returned back to the hospital.

Thank you for reading! I hope this interests you enough to watch the film, it’s really a masterpiece. 

Before I sit down and write, there’s one word on my mind: snow. 

            Beep! 

            “Chunks of snow and frost tumble down from the disturbed hillsides. They’re sloped like mountains and could just as well hatch one. Like an egg tooth bursting from the rounded peak of its shell. Egg teeth are probably white, like snow. So, there’s egg teeth and frost tumbling down from cracked nests that are convex instead of concave. Not a very good nest, mama bird. Unless you’re looking to have them soar. The hillsides, I mean. The mountains are dead with that. But the hillsides reach higher than dead mountains, likely because the dead mountains are dead. You think a hillside could fly as long as it kept breathing?” 

            Dr. Faraday opens her mouth to speak, but she’s quickly cut off by the beep of an input and an automated voice. 

            Beep! 

            “—Don’t answer that. These are my words, the thought of you speaking makes my mouth itch. Prickle. It’s not going away. It’s like a tickle with nails but soft like a buzz, like the feeling from a fly zipping across your ear minus the fly inside your mouth, and you don’t flinch so much as cringe, which could make frost and teeth fall off your shoulders, which would make your shoulders hillsides. I don’t want birds on my shoulders. Those are mine. These are mine. I’m gonna sprout mountains from my hillsides to punt them off. Choke on the teeth in the sky.” 

            “Shut off the audio both ways.” 

            Beep! 

            “The s-” 

            The laboratory goes silent as a collective, save for the shuffling of individuals subconsciously moving closer to one another. The shuffling brings them further away from their creation, and it would be laughable if not for the enormity of the subject. A human brain, lab grown, hooked up to walls of monitors and tubes, sits in a small, square, see-through containment unit upon a pedestal. It is labeled ‘The Terrarium,’ by a fancifully penned sticky note. Dr. Faraday wrote it, and placed it, herself. 

            Still, nobody speaks. Someone in the back brings up a transcript of the brain’s conversation onto a large monitor. It is read, clear as day, silently, by all present. All at once: 

            “That’s a bit aggressive, right?” 

            “It’s making up sensations for itself.” 

            “Absolutely none of that made sense.” 

            “That sure is some data.” 

            “We made that.” 

            “Interesting…” 

            “Oh, man.” 

When I finally take the time to look up from my mind, I see a hundred different words alongside the simple starting point of ‘snow.’ 

Boy, did we drift off from snow. But I don’t dislike it. It’s raw, and might not make sense, but it was freeing to write, and likely influenced by the absolutely freezing air conditioner in front of me. It’s probably laden with other little bits like that. Little bits of me. In any case, it sparks ideas, and it was fun, and I think everyone needs to have some fun with their writing. There are the agonizing bits of writing, the joyous bits of writing, and what you get when you start off with the word ‘snow,’ then get paragraphs leading up to an ethical dilemma. Maybe the next time I simply want to write, I’ll sit down with the word ‘brain,’ and see where I’m taken. 

 

What’s up my beautiful lords and ladies and the stables folks in the back. Today’s blog is going to be something special. So, Me and Tiara, who didn’t want me to make this blog, are currently working on a big project right now and I wanted to share it with y’all.  

AKA:  I couldn’t think of anything to write and waited till the day before. 

So anyway! The thing that we are working on is a novel. Isn’t that exciting, it’s not for NaNoWriMo so don’t worry this is for just our own little fun. So, sit back and relax or whatever you do when you read these blogs and enjoy the ride. 

 

Welcome To Etherwind!!!  

    Long ago when the world was first created there were many different creatures that walked all over the land, many of them magical and others not. One day after a star fell out of the sky and on to a tree in the forest the power from this star caused a ripple that would in turn forever change life on Etherwind. From the tree a small being came out this creature had oak colored skin with pointy ears and when it touched the ground flowers and grass shot from the ground. The small beings looked around and when they noticed how damaged the tree looked from the impact of the star, they used their new power and brought the tree back but instead of the 40-foot oak tree it was before it became almost 100 feet tall. As the tree grew and grew the pointy eared creature noticed more beings coming out of the tree some looked like it, some with darker skin, and some with lighter skin.  

   On the other side of the world another miracle was happening. Dust from the fallen star sprinkles over an ocean and on the shore of a beach laid a creature who looked just like you and me. The being opened its eyes, which sparkled from the sun they walked around the beach the sand sticking to its feet and toes. When they got off the beach, they were met with the sight of vast land that stretched almost forever with pom trees and other plants and flowers. As thy looked around they missed as just as the small point eared creature more beings that looked like it came out of the sea, and they also took in their surroundings.  

   Lastly, on another side where the winds have a very cold bite many magical and nonmagical creatures, Werewolves, unicorns, foxes, bunnies, and others gather around a lake that was formed form the impact of the star’s fall. These animals gathered around the newly form lake and each took a sip. As each animal drank form the lake their bodies glowed, then one by one they were covered in a blinding yellow light. When the light cleared from all the animals, they could see that there weren’t really animals anymore. They now looked just like the other beings that came out of the ocean but there was something different about them. The creature who used to be a bunny could jump higher than normal. While then being that was once a phoenix has an unnatural heat coming of its body. 

 

After a while these beings bring new life to Etherwind as they learn how to live on the world. Even discovering each other. This doesn’t go over well at first but after hundreds and thousands of years they finally find peace with one another and live in harmony.  

 

Thank you for reading about this world that we created. I can’t wait to share more with y’all, but as of right now this is all we have. If you have any questions or comments don’t be afraid to leave them down below and I’ll answer as best, I can. Again, thanks for reading my blog today. 🙂 🤍🩵

Beneath The Bridge of Aberdeen

                                                           

The 90s was an incredible decade for music. Dozens of albums were made that will certainly outlast the test of time. Grace, Adrenaline, In Utero, The Color And The Shape, The Bends, OK Computer, Mellon Collie And The Infinite Sadness, Siamese Dream,  Either/Or, In The Aeroplane Over The Sea, and countless others. All these magnificent albums were made within the span of a few years, each one sure to outlast all of us through the course of time and musical history. The most amazing part about these albums is that even though they were made over two decades ago, generations from then and now can both relate to them. Newer generations are falling in love with music that their parents fell in love with.  It shows that bonding over music can’t be held to the laws of time. For instance, Nirvana is now a disbanded group after the tragic death of Kurt Cobain. Even now, decades after their last tour, they still have millions of monthly listeners from both newer and older generations. 

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Nirvana quickly took the world by storm. With their debut album BLEACH, released in 1989. BLEACH is one of Nirvana’s lesser-known albums. It shows more of their hard-rock side. With more grungy and distorted songs.

Most people know Dave Grohl to be Nirvana’s drummer, however, this was not case for this album. Throughout Nirvana’s earlier years, they had a hard time keeping one drummer. Bob McFadden, their first drummer, only played for about a month. Then Aaron Burkhard, then their most regrettable, Chad Channing.

Kurt had said that Chad Channing had severe anger issues. He was hot-headed and just didn’t fit in with the other members.

Nevermind was recorded in 1991 with the help of Butch Vig as the producer.
Butch Vig has been a major help for famous artists like The Smashing Pumpkins and Sonic Youth. From interviews and articles, it is easy to tell he’s a master at his craft. Although Butch wasn’t the biggest fan of Kurt’s perfectionism, they appreciated each other’s hard work.

On September 24th, 1991, Nirvana released their sophomore album Nevermind. One of the most successful albums ever released. A severe lack of stock caused the album to be held in high demand. You would be lucky if you even found a copy months after its release. Everyone wanted it.

The Album held thirteen total tracks, one of which, was “Something In The Way” one of Nirvana’s slowest and softest songs. “Something In The Way” contains a quiet guitar, slow vocals, deep yet soft drums, and most surprising of all, a cello. The hit grunge band had shown that their talent far exceeded anyone’s expectations and proved they couldn’t be held to just one standard.

The lyrics behind this song talk about a boy, who lives beneath a bridge, traps animals, tames them, and makes them his pets. It talks about how he lives off the drippings from his ceiling and the grass that surrounds him. It also mentions that “It’s okay to eat fish, ‘cause they don’t have any feelings.” which could be assumed to mean that this boy might be against eating other kinds of animals.

Conflicting rumors have said that this song takes inspiration from Kurt Cobain’s personal life as
a young adult. He was kicked out of his house in 1983 for quitting high school two weeks before his graduation and wanting to pursue his passion for music. Contrary to what the rumors say, on multiple accounts, it’s been said that he often stayed with his friends, sleeping on their couches. It wasn’t until three years later, in 1986, that he got his first apartment.

During the recording of “Something In The Way” Kurt Cobain had been adamant about making this song perfect. Butch Vig said,

“‘Something In The Way’ was definitely the hardest track to record on Nevermind. After three or four takes on trying to cut it live in the main room, it just wasn’t happening. Kurt came into the control room out of frustration, sat on the couch and basically said it needed to sound like this. He laid on his back, he played his guitar, and he was barely singing. It was coming out at almost a whisper.”

He stopped Kurt, turned off all the fans in the room, put a microphone in front of him, and told him to just do what he had to do, and after three takes, they had the base of the song.  Kurt had wanted a cello’ in the song. However, it was the last day that they rented the studio. They began calling friends, asking if anyone could play the cello. Thankfully, one of their friends, Kirk Canning, who lived in LA at the time, was able to help them produce the last parts of the song. Contrary to how Butch felt, Kurt talked about how thankful he was for how easy the recording of “Something In The Way” had been. He compared it to Dominos, everything just fell into place.
Despite their personal beliefs and differences, they came together and created one of history’s most successful albums of all time. Forever to be remembered.

I’m gonna throw myself off the Empire State Building.

You ever find a show that like fully encompasses your person, like who you are as a character and a belief system? Well, I haven’t yet, but I got pretty close with the Cartoon Network show, Mao Mao: Heroes of Pure Heart.

Mao Mao: Heroes of Pure Heart is a pseudo-action/anime/cartoon about the adventures of Mao Mao Mao, an aspiring “Hero” who has to protect the town of Pure Heart Valley. Because he crashed in to the Ruby Pure Heart, basically a magical force field for the kingdom that is now broken, monsters and villains threaten the kingdom on the daily as he fights alongside his “co-heroes” Adorabat and Badgerclops.

This show isn’t very complex at all—no more complex than season 1 Gravity falls! You don’t need a bible to understand it’s lore. But even if it’s not, it’s still surprising. I could talk on and on about what I want to follow in this show and all the things that impress me but man.

For one, the main characters are absolutely standout. You can tell they’re such strong reflections of real life, mixed with the absolute absurdity of just this world, like. There’s the Sweetie Pies which are basically glorified Muppets and then you have Badgerclops and Mao Mao, just sort of two normal guys?? And Adorabat’s an absolute freak of nature, it’s amazing. There’s compilations of her character where all she does is scream, she is genuinely unhinged in the most inhuman ways possible, and at the same time, she’s just a regular nine-year-old (but the show states that’s she’s five. So.)

We’ll get to Mao Mao and what I like about him, but I’ve edited this multiple times, I’m on my third, and I haven’t talked about Badgerclops once. It’s a little surprising if I’m honest. He’s a pretty swell character and perfect for a “straight man” archetype, but in the same way, he’s also undeniably batshit. Like if you don’t know what it is, I’d recommend looking into what a straight man in comedy is, but he’s so funny. Like if Mao Mao’s unfriendly, he’s an absolute asshole. It’s fantastic.

This show also blends comedy and sincerity in such a captivating way. Like bear with me here, but it’s reminiscent of LEGO Batman. Have you seen how that movie uses comedy? It fully engrosses you in the scene with just how bizarre and weird it is and then gutpunches you with lore. They play their cards right because it’s not in your face, it’s really sparingly used. But when this show does lore, it can get really beautiful. And with the animation to accompany it? Holy hell man. I can point to several scenes that absolutely make me lose my mind, but my chest would hurt to describe them. Shout out to Small.

And back onto the characters, I mentioned the Sweetie Pies, but there are some real of side characters here, some of the funniest I’ve seen on television. The Sky Pirates? Changed the game. I see them on screen, and I think, Oh Man, This is Gonna Be Good. Even if the episode isn’t that funny, they still shine 9/10 (even more than that, probably.) In fact, most of the unfunny episodes they Elevate. Pinky is a similar monster of just being a disgusting mess of a creature, who shouldn’t even get to call himself an animal, a really good use of absurd comedy.

This show has some kickass themes by the way, absolutely stellar storytelling.

There’s a big theme of identity in the show—who you are to other people, to who you want to be, and yourself as a whole. God, it’s so good! Mao Mao struggles a lot with the person he is and the person he wants to be. Who are you without these things, who do people think you are? Who do you want to be? Do you love themes of self-relationship which a character who needs to constantly relearn it? Well, they got it!

Another massive theme of the show is family: specifically between Mao Mao, his old family, and his new family. Mentoring and “fathering” overlap in stories like these, but Adorabat is fundamental to his character and his growth across the story. Mao Mao adopts a fatherly dynamic with Adorabat by like the second episode they know each other. Hilarious. (Shout out episode: “Adoradad” for unrelated reasons.)

And you can tell through his dynamic with her, he’s trying to be a good influence on her. The thing is, he’s not perfect at it. They want the same thing: to become a HERO. But being a “hero” as much as it is a storytelling device as it is a metaphor. Because what Mao Mao believed he needed to be a hero, isn’t the same as what applies to Adorabat. And that changes things. And Mao Mao is wrong about a lot of things.

How Mao Mao was raised affects him greatly—it’s pretty much hammered into you throughout the show. He’s crazy paranoid; chases glory, fame, and attention; and cannot admit failure or defeat no matter the obstacle in his path. He goes to therapy! Really! And he still turns out wrong 90% which I think is pretty good. A lot of the things he believes are wrong as much as they are right. But teaching Adorabat, he realizes he needs to challenge these things about himself and maybe what it means to be a hero altogether.

I can’t look you in the eyes and tell you this is some of the best on television because that’s subjective. But it’s funny, heartwarming, action-packed, and has a great story to tell. So if you’re looking for something to sit down with and have some fun with, I can’t recommend it enough.

 

Unfortunately, this show only got one season. And I’m forever going to be as bitter as probably a [joke redacted] but I’m glad it got a chance where it did.

And with even more unfortunate news, is not on any streaming services! Or network channels! The story is messy and convoluted as it always is, but you cannot find it on MAX or Netflix, and Amazon Prime does have it, but I don’t know if you want to pay $120 for 40 episodes of television but hey. So, I can’t recommend you to sail the seven seas, but I will emphasize to you that the only place you can watch this show makes you pay $2.99 per individual episode. 🦜🏴‍☠️

 

 

Oh my God, the entire show is a pun on the phrase, “My dad is my hero.” I’m gonna go get a drink.

I open up to a blank page, document, note, and begin to write. My typing is faster than my mind and my mind is faster than my typing, but there are still words, and I’m still writing. My handwriting is messy and overly spaced, but so is my mind, and I’m still writing. Even if I may loathe the outcome, at the end of the day, it’s still writing. 

Journaling, though at times a battle to start, is entirely worthwhile. I am no expert at it, but if there is an expert at something as personal as journaling, I think I’d furrow my brow. The entire point of journaling is to write, well or not, about anything you want. A journal for you and you only, so you can really make it whatever you want. I use mine with no theme involved. The pages hold whatever is on my mind. Still, even with how free a journal is, I have found some advice and collected some experience that helps, because ironically the hardest part of writing a journal is the writing part. You can know it’s supposed to be messy and whatever you want, but it’s difficult to stay true to something so undefined. Freedom in messiness lets you discover more things about yourself, and that’s daunting, but immensely helpful. You can think more clearly once your thoughts are on the page instead of on the brain. 

One piece of advice I have found helpful is to write notes anywhere, everywhere, and on anything. Take that napkin from a restaurant and turn it into a notepad, then copy it down in your journal if you feel like it. You can also cut out bits from notepads, worksheets, sketchbook pages, etc., and glue them into your journal. Heck, stick entire sticky notes in there. It’s fun. The more chaotic your journal is, the easier it is to write chaotically in it. 

Telling yourself to write chaotically and messily can still leave you with the itchy feeling that you’re performing a task wrong. You become all too aware of every sentence you can reword, every punctuation mark you should put, the reading speed of your words. I find it helps to turn this into a more solid challenge. Challenge yourself to write with absolutely no punctuation, making the lack of punctuation undeniably the point, and only cast a glance at the last word you wrote if you must. Messiness goes from something you feel like you should be doing to something more fun with a mysterious outcome. 

Don’t confine your journal to only words. For me, my journal serves the purpose of writing every day, but I still draw in it. Journals are creative outlets where any urge you can fit on a page goes. You don’t even have to be good at drawing or writing if you think you aren’t. From the stone age to the day you’re reading this, humans from early ages have indulged in finger painting and writing and warbling tunes. It is human nature to create, and nobody has the right to say you must be good at it to do it. You, Picasso, and the people who drew on cavern walls are all united in the act of creation. That is good. Things can be good, messy, and upsetting. Go wild. 

Journaling, though at times a battle to start, is entirely worthwhile. I hope this helps you with your journaling joys and endeavors. There are still many ways to journal, and experimenting with different methods reveals different results for everyone. Even if these methods don’t spark a fire for you, keep messing around with all sorts of things. You’ll get there.  

I figured given the new word limit for blogs I ought to dive back into my routes, yapping endlessly about a TV show no one else has seen that ended over twenty years ago. Buffy The Vampire Slayer. 

I am shocked I haven’t written a blog about Willow Rosenberg yet. So guess what this blog is about. 

Willow Rosenberg played by Alyson Hannigan was introduced as Buffy’s goody two shoes best friend. Shy and socially awkward she had very few friends before Buffy, the only one truly being Xander. The comedic relief character for lack of a better word. Throughout the course of the show, Willow discovered her connection to witchcraft which she mixed with her existing knowledge of science. This brought her more out of her shell, and she started to gain a stronger personality away from simply being the nerdy friend. Willow’s first love interest aside from her brief stunt with Xander, was Oz, a short ginger werewolf. I believe he also helped draw out more of Willow’s personality and independence.

 

Skipping ahead to season four Willow and Oz had broken up, and she was entering college. This is where she meant her second love interest. Tara, the complete opposite of Oz earnestly mirroring an early Willow with a socially awkward and shy attitude. They quickly grew closer with the help of their shared status as witches. 

 

Willow’s relationship with Tara grew as it did with magic. After she brings back Buffy from the dead, which we later find out ripped her out of heaven. Her relationship with magic revealed itself in an unhealthy light. We start to see her dependence on it for the first time. Giles confronts her after finding out what she did and she is defiant in taking his warnings, a trait never seen before within Willow. Her dependency on magic quickly wedges a gap between her and Tara. Ultimately leading to the end of their relationship when she uses magic to manipulate Tara’s mind into forgetting an argument. 

Speaking of Willow’s relationship with magic it was evident to me that it was an allegory for substance abuse even before hearing the writer of the show confirm this. 

After their break up and almost losing her friendship with Buffy after nearly killing her little sister Dawn, Willow begins to try and get clean from magic. We follow her struggles with not using magic. Eventually she is able to completely stop using magic, being given a very minimal amount of scrutiny at one point but Tara is right there to back her up. 

They end up getting back together but soon after Tara gets shot and killed by Warren. Willow attempts to bring Tara back but is unable to because her death was inherently human and not by supernatural forces the same way Buffy’s was. This catapults Willow back into her magic addiction. Turning her into Dark Willow. She seeks revenge against Tara’s killers. Killing and skinning Warren, she attempts to kill the other two after not being able to and draining the magic from Giles. She sets out to end the world but is deterred by her friendship with Xander. Giles takes her away and helps her try and heal her relationship with magic. After this she doesn’t use magic for a while, except when her and Kennedy get together but it was her underlying guilt for moving on from Tara and killing Warren that caused her to subconsciously cast a spell that turned her into Warren. 

It was great to see Willow deal with that anger and guilt. Tara was a huge part of Willow’s story and it was great to see that she still meant something even after she was gone. As well as confronting Jonah and Andrew (the other men Willow tried to kill) with the role that they played, not letting them be blindly redeemed but seeing them show remorse. 

Seeing the actress for Warren mirror the Actress for Willow’s mannerisms was phenomenal to watch, as well as the way the camera was played with or the moments when they chose to switch out the actors. It was clearly a well thought out decision. 

This experience does scare Willow away from magic but this time she couldn’t run for long. Due to the circumstances her magic was needed to essentially save the world. 

The ending scene of Willow using magic perfectly contrasts the first appearance of Dark Willow. From  pitch black hair with soulless pupils to pristine white hair and her regular eyes. I love the incorporation of her eye color. It almost feels like a symbol of how the magic is not overtaking her, she’s still there behind it.  

Willow’s character ark was very interesting to me. Because to put a character so widely beloved through so much and shine her in a sort of antagonistic light is so interesting.