Category: Junior Literary

Last week I mentioned an internal clash between logic and creativity. If you have not yet read my previous post, I recommend you do so before continuing, as I will pursue the thought somewhat. Although I will not circle this blog around logic versus creativity, I want to address the topic once more. I have turned it over in my mind a lot, and I believe I might have found some helpful advice.

If you walk the line between concrete and abstract thinking—or if you simply feel drained of creativity—I encourage you to pause and observe your surroundings. Sometimes we become so rushed, caught up in the ceaseless current of the world, but even a mere ten seconds of thought can make a difference. Because when you stop walking from A to B, when you stop taking life from one event to the next, your brain will slow and not compute like an overworked computer.

Artists are odd creatures. They may or may not blend in with society, but their eyes see so much. If you do not consider yourself an artist, you may be wondering what they see because, after all, we live in a tangible world. You can pick up or alter the state of anything you see, and a lamp is just a lamp. But an artist, however, can view that same lamp as a tall friend with curly hair. An artist can interpret it as fierce illumination, and paint something with it as inspiration.

So how do you see through an artist’s eyes?

The answer: exercising your right brain, turning against the current, and listening. Sit on a bench for ten minutes without checking your cell phone or fretting about work and deadlines. You can allow life to pull you along, but peer out of the window every so often. And make a point to view the world differently. Because once you sit in a thoughtful silence, your eyes will see so much more, and you will think less in equations.

To conclude this post, I want to tack on a list of recent instances I followed this advice. Hopefully, if you are still confused, it will provide some direction.

Ascending a flight of stairs (we suffer from not looking up enough):

The dangling blinds sliced the sun, and the pieces smeared across the wall. Dust drifted down upon me, illuminated by the myriad of smoldering horizons.

Sitting on a bench beneath a tree:

Although summer still lingered, I saw traces of arriving autumn. The leaves fell onto my metal bench like rain beneath an umbrella, and the air had become cooled by a calm weariness. I saw the word anticipation in red and purple letters.

Waiting for an elevator:

Some of the trees seemed soaked in lemon juice, their leaves of yellow tinge and frayed at the edges. As I picked them out of the dense fog, the arrow above the elevator door turned yellow.

---

In short, do not be afraid to stop and smell the roses. It will, without question, boost your creativity. Take inspiration from even the most mundane environments, and you will grow.

I have had so many personalities over the years. I have also had many different styles.

I remember when I used to wear cowboy boots with bootcut jeans. I listened to country while wearing that style. I also said y’all constantly.

But that was not me. That was my families influence on me.

I wore jeggings from Justice. They were stretchy, and did not flatter my figure. My hair would be tied up in a pony tail. I would wear this blue, fuzzy (imagine the cookie monster) jacket, and for some reason, I would wear hiking boots. I listened to pop.

But that was not me. That was me trying to find myself when I had no one to guide me. I suppose you could call that my awkward faze-Ew.

In 8th grade I wore hoodies all year round-preferably black. In fact my whole outfit was usually black. I felt comfortable in that color; in those hoodies. I listened to rock (Pierce the Veil, Sleeping with Sirens, Black Veil Brides, The Killers, etc.).

Was that me? No, not exactly. It was more of a self conscious, confidence-lacking version of me. Though, I was beginning to see myself.

Now, I wear bangs, glasses, and belts. Some days I wear mom jeans, cardigans, and doc martens. Other days I wear black on black. I wear what I want. I wear what makes me happy. I listen to many different types of music such as rock, jazz, classical, international rock + pop, etc. I listen to what I want. I listen to what makes me happy.

Am I me now? How can I even define who I am by music and clothes? Perhaps other people can, but I will tell you who I really am.

I am not a set of clothes, nor am I the music I listen to. I am not my dad, my mom, and my brother. I am none of those tangible things that you may think of.

I am funny, serious, loving, determined, passionate, witty, sarcastic, empathetic, sensitive, creative, and so many other things other than what you can visibly see.

So before you go and label someone based on what they look like, or even what they sound like. I want to challenge you to look deeper into who that person is. It may surprise you how much there personality radiates such a beauty about them.

My name is Hannah Hays, and I am unapologetically me.

And you should be unapologetic about who you are as well. After all, your body has overcome so many things. Your mind has faced several issues. You are strong, and I commend you for that.

 

Anyone who knows me knows that I am a huge music fanatic. I LOVE music so much. I love listening to it, learning it, making it, etc. So, I made a playlist of my favorite songs and why they’re my favorite. (as of right now. they change, like, every 2 weeks.)

Before we begin, I just need to put a little disclaimer: some of these songs have inappropriate language, but all of them also have a clean version! So, with that being said, let’s jump right in!

Oh wait, there’s more. These are in no particular order, I just wrote what songs came to mind first. You’ll see that some songs towards the bottom have higher rankings than the ones at the top. (The rating scale is 1-10, 1 being okay and 10 being heavenly.)

1. I Can’t Handle Change- Roar

-This is my favorite song right now because, like the title says, I can’t handle change that well. I’ve lived in one house, one town, and one state my whole life. Nothing has had to change for me except the amount of people living with me. My household went from 5 people to just me and my mom. It was hard to adjust and this song came on shuffle while I was browsing through Spotify and it stuck with me. There’s a part in the song where one of the singers simply says, “Leave me alone, leave me alone”. I like this part not only because of the way it sounds but because I LOOOVE my alone time. Sometimes I just want everyone to leave me alone. 10/10

2.  Work Song- Hozier

-This song is beautiful in so many ways. The love that Hozier is feeling for this woman is so strong, I feel like anyone who listens can feel it. I often wonder what it would be like to be loved as deeply as Hozier loves this woman. I have two favorite lyrics, and they’re my favorite because they are both just so deep and beautifully written. My number one favorite is, “When my time comes around, lay me gently in the cold, dark earth. No grave can hold my body down, I’ll crawl home to her.” Every time I hear this lyric, I just stop and can’t help but to think “wow.” My second favorite lyric in this song is, “When I was kissing on my baby, and she put her love down soft and sweet. In the lowland plot, I was free. Heaven and Hell were words to me.” He’s basically saying that he doesn’t care where he ends up, as long as he is with her. GOOSEBUMPS TO THE MAX! This is the kind of song you keep on repeat for 5 months (tooootally not speaking from personal experiences) 10000000000000/10

3. Love- Lana Del Rey

-This song is all about being young and in love. It’s about the things teenagers do in their youth with the person they love. This song is soothing to listen to. But, if you can relate to it, it’s even more beautiful. Personally, I can feel this song in my chest and in my gut. This is the kind of song that you play in a car going down the interstate with all of the windows down. It is the teenage anthem for being young and foolishly in love. 10/10

4. SLOW DANCING IN THE DARK- Joji

-Where do I even start? This song is phenomenal, to say the least. When he says, “Now I’m around slow dancing in the dark. Don’t follow me, you’ll end up in my arms”, it gives me goosebumps. His vocals, the poetry, the meaning. It all makes for an amazing listen. It’s a very sad song, though. In one part he says, “you looked at me like I was someone else” and it tugged a heart- string because I know what it’s like being with someone who has feelings for another person. This is also a song that resonates in the deepest pits of your heart, if you can relate. I know it does for me. This is the kind of song you listen to when you’re laying in bed, depressed.  100000/10

5. Caged Bird- Myles Cameron

-This song is about trying to move on after you’ve been in a relationship for a long time and it ended. Myles Cameron says it’s like a caged bird trying to learn how to fly again. This was my go- to song when my ex of 2 years and I split up. I realized how much it is like trying to learn how to fly. You’re gonna fall a few times but you’ll get it eventually. All you need is time. Not only is this song very deep and meaningful, but his voice is deep and soothing. It’s very smooth sounding. He’s also very underrated and doesn’t have that many listeners. This is also a song to listen to when you’re staring at the ceiling and being depressed. 8.5/10

6. Loving Is Easy- Rex Orange County

-Just a warning: this song contains a few bad words so don’t say I didn’t warn you if you decide to play it in front of your grandma and one of the first things she hears is the “F” bomb.

Anyway, this song is honestly hilarious. It’s very upbeat and happy sounding, but it is basically saying that his ex made him think that love should be hard. Then, when they split, he realized that loving is easy. And she had him “messed” up (not really what he said but this is a school blog, so.) This song makes me laugh every time I hear it because it’s very easy to relate to. People will try to tell you that loving someone is hard, but it’s not. What you two face together may be hard, but loving, and I mean really loving, someone is not hard. This is the kind of song you BOP to in the car. It’s so funny and upbeat. 8/10

7. Nobody- Jhene Aiko

-I love this song because Jhene is basically saying that she never needed anyone. I relate to this because almost everything I’ve done since I could do it on my own, I have done it on my own. I never needed help from anyone and I doubt I ever will. It’s kind of a sad song because it has a feeling of betrayal and she’s firing back that she doesn’t need whoever hurt her. I relate to this because I had a friend that used to borrow money from me all the time and when I stopped giving it to her, she decided that she didn’t want to be friends anymore and I realized that I didn’t need her. In fact, I was waaaay better off without her. This is the song you play when someone has hurt you and you need to remind yourself that you don’t need ANYONE except yourself. 7/10

8. Somebody Else- The 1975

-Whew. This song honestly makes me cry. It’s one of the saddest songs I’ve ever heard. And I mean a “feel it sink from your heart to your gut” kind of sad. It’s about the person he loves, loving somebody else. I feel this song in my chest because I know what it is like to watch the person you love, love somebody else in ways that he/ she never loved you. It’s a very raw emotion that clogs up your throat and makes your heart heavy. Just listening to this song makes me feel that way. Although it may seem upbeat, if you listen, you will hear just how heart breaking it really is. This is the song that gets you so depressed that when it comes on shuffle, you sit down and stare at the water running down your knees. 7.5/10

 

9. Lost in You- khai dreams

-This song is so simple and uplifting. I can’t help but to bop my head to the sides when this song comes on. It’s not a childish song but it makes you feel a child- like giddiness inside. Maybe that’s just me connecting to every song I’ve ever heard. It’s only 1.41 minutes long but sometimes a song doesn’t need to be long to be good. My favorite lyric from this whole song is, “we can get lost in an offbeat rhythm, feel the way that you’re moving and I think that I get it”. I just love the poetry of the phrase “get lost in an offbeat rhythm” because not everything has to be perfect to be beautiful. Just like this song! This is the kind of song that comes on shuffle while you’re washing dishes or folding the laundry and you start to dance a little and hum along. 9/10

10. Easily- Bruno Major

-The first thing you hear Bruno Major say is, “don’t you tell me that it wasn’t meant to be, call it quits, call it destiny. Just because it won’t come easily doesn’t mean we shouldn’t try.” This song is just all around so beautiful. It’s very romantic to listen to because of the pace, the music, his voice. It’s a song that I can imagine dancing to in the kitchen at midnight with my soulmate. It has a vintage- y feel to it and it’s overall a refreshing listen. This is the song you play when you’re slow dancing with yourself.  10/10

Well, those were my favorite songs right now and why they’re my favorites. I hope you listen to them and love them as much as I do! Also, please don’t think that I am depressed and all that jazz because I threw in some jokes about staring at the ceiling and sitting in the shower. (Been there, done that. Never again, lol)

I really enjoyed writing this so there will probably be a LOT more reviews on songs and books. Hope you enjoy and I’ll see you again next Wednesday!

*reading back on this, I realize that I write exactly like I talk. Scattered, all of the place, bad humor, forgetfulness. But, this is a blog, not a novel so not everything will be perfect and smooth. I am a messy writer and I own it! Okay, bye for- real this time*

This is gonna be a series on short films. I didn’t seriously get into short films until recently. I was randomly scrolling on Youtube and came across this short film about these group of friends and one of the friends died by electrocution. It’s very blunt but the sheer aspect of it was so unexpected and left me compelled to see what was going to happen next. Unfortunately, that isn’t the short film I’m reviewing today 🙂 When I look for short films to watch, I never search for anything specific. The pure enjoyment of finding one adds a level of anticipation that makes the whole experience of watching 10x better. My selection of the day is called Roadside directed by Jakob Owens and Ryan Alexander. This film was 4 minutes and 55 seconds long, contained a fair amount of dialogue and only consisted of two characters. There were no names, no specific setting, just a man and a woman on a lone road in what seems like the middle of nowhere. The simplicity of the film is what gave it its character. Many simple films don’t pace the plot and rush it completely, giving away its excitement or completely overwhelming the audience. Roadside made a good move in pacing it in a way that didn’t give too much away in the beginning of the film, giving the audience the chance to ponder over what could happen. This movie was labeled a thriller though I think it should’ve been labeled suspense simply because of the dramatic climax of the film. The climax itself was very well executed. The directors did well in fooling the audience to think one thing was going to happen but having a completely different thing happen. That aspect I enjoyed very much. Overall this film, on a scale of 1-10, was a 8.5. If the acting itself was better, I think a 10/10 would’ve sufficed. Comment what you think of the film below!!

https://youtu.be/84sKjWyMFoE

I want nothing more
than to have nothing at all.
I want to live the rest of my life
having never known your name
or heard your voice
or understood just who you were to me.

I want nothing more
than to know that  You are a  not
pertinent part of my life.
I want to wake up in the mornings and feel
refreshed.
I don’t want to feel your presence over me any longer.

So, Ominous Presence Breathing Down My Neck 24/7, 
I relinquish you from my life.
You are no longer any concern to me
nor I to you.

I will allow you closure and
anything else you may need 
for your new life without me 
to feed upon, but I will not
continue to be the force
you indulge on.

Now, I hope you starve of the
satisfaction of draining me 
until I am a lifeless pile
on the floor.

I wanted nothing more
than nothing at all.
now, I finally have my
clean slate.

If I am going to be completely honest, I have no idea where this poem came from. I needed a blog post, so I started listening to Fleetwood Mac, Sonic Youth, and vaporwaved Abba and this is what came of it.

In the poem, I am referencing to my biological mother. I’m not going to display my entire life story on a blog in school, but she has always felt like a shadow in my life, always lurking in the back, watching. I’ve never really resented her, but I do resent that presence, so I “relinquished” and gave it away to whomever takes it. 

I have always been a lover of music, it just speaks to me no matter what kind of mood I am in. So I thought it would be interesting if I created this new segment on my blog called playlist of the month. It will consist of multiple songs from all types of genres that I felt connected to in that month. That being said, here is the playlist of the month for August 2019.

This playlist includes different types of genres ranging from late 50s Doo-wop with “I Only Have Eyes for You” by The Flamingos, to modern pop with Normani’s latest single “Motivation.” With a rewind to the 70s with Donny Hathaway’s “A Song for You” and many more varieties. I hope you all enjoy this August playlist and look forward to many more to come.

I can’t remember the last time I did something stupidly impulsive ( besides dying my hair 2 different colors at 3 in the morning on a Wednesday). Lately, it feels as if every word I say is carefully articulated and reiterated in my head multiple times before I actually speak. It feels like I’m not doing anything for myself. I don’t think I’m laughing for myself anymore? I don’t think that I’m breathing for myself anymore?

At this point, I’ve become what I think everyone else wants me to be.

I’ve never been like that in my life. And now, whoopty doo da, I’m a walking, talking mannequin. I’m clay in the midst of sculptors. But they aren’t molding me. I am. I’m stuck in a loop of positioning and repositioning and changing how I act and my body language and how I breathe. I’m stuck.

I’m Stuck.

Stuck in a whirlwind of teenagers, concrete, and anything/everything in between. They’re spinning, spinning, until they become dizzy. Then they wobble and topple over each, me in the middle of it all. And, as they lay on the floor, awaiting another round of Ring-Around-The-Rosie: High School Edition, they look almost miserable. They look like they actually miss the loop of haze mixed with weed smoke, lost eyesight, and late-night-depression drinking. They look as if they want to keep it going. Forever and ever. Never ending cycles of bs and hopelessness. And, like clockwork, they get back up and start it all again. And I watch as the weed turns to heroine and the 45 turns to Balkan. Now, they’re just a bumbling, babbling jumble of addicts. They fall and don’t get back up.

This place is a blur. A few days ago, I was me. I was who I wanted to be. Now, I’m a ghost of someone new. Someone not exactly here yet but you feel their presence. Someone not necessarily bad, but you have your suspicions. Someone you don’t know yet but you don’t want to change. That someone is not me. I want to be me. I want to be the me I’ve always been. The stupid, impulsive, curly haired me that I’ve, apparently, built my reputation around. I want to remain at my simplest form. But there’s nothing simple about growing up in Mississippi. There’s nothing simple about not wanting to be like them. There’s nothing simple about growing up and realizing that what’s in front of you is not something you want to be apart of.

But, when the haze is gone, and the whirling winds are asleep, and the last of us are quietly contemplating the silent release in the dead of night, only then am I to be who I truly was born to be. The jumbled mess of letters that seemingly make no sense.

Hi everyone! It’s my first post since being here at MSA. I thought it would be interesting to share my journey of writing. I would also love to hear about yours (if you consider yourself one).

First, I want to define what a writer is.

Writer: a person who has written a particular text; one who writes.

When you look at this literal form of the definition it seems like anyone could be a writer, which is true in a way. You could write an essay, a short story, anything really, and be considered a writer.

I have a different spin on this word though. Being a writer is a part of who I am. I love words, and I have a desire to form meaningful pieces with them. I want people to feel the emotions I am feeling while I write.

So I would say that the feeling and passion for writing really makes a difference between just writing whatever without any true meaning towards it.

Now, I would like to share my journey of becoming a writer with you guys. Maybe you can relate to this, or you may be curious about how one ‘becomes’ a writer.

When I was around seven I would always grab stacks of copy paper from my dad’s office. I would sneak back into my room and the process would begin. I would take the copy paper and make stick figures and give them dialogue. Typically, my stories were about stereotypical mean high school girls and crushes- I remember titling one “The Bachelor.”

Skip to me being ten at Justice (the store) picking up a pink, fuzzy diary and a fluffy pen. Now, that’s where my journaling and poetry began. Again, the writing (specifically my poetry) was stereotypical romance and conflicts.

Here’s one of my poems:

“My love is deeply cut into pieces, and scattered all around. I can’t say what I want to him or else it will all turn upside-down. Though my heart really wants to speak, my breath can’t make a sound.”

Okay, I know what you are thinking, “Well I guess she chose romance as the main thing she wrote, and still writes.” -And, boy oh boy, would you be wrong.

In middle school a lot happened in my life-big changes. So that not only had an effect on how I acted, but it also changed what genre I wrote. This was the time when I wrote almost everyday. This is the moment when writing became my crutch.

I stopped truly writing after that point in my life (about 8th grade). Frankly, I didn’t know who I was as a writer anymore.

I felt disabled.

I couldn’t pick up a pen and express my feelings on a page like I used to. My dreams of being an author were replaced by other things (makeup, Netflix, etc.)

So, I had to begin my journey back to writing. I wanted to get back that missing part of me. Even if it was hard.

That did not seriously begin until I thought about coming here (MSA). Yes, it took that long to come back to writing. That is because I had to do some forgiving towards others, and myself.

From that point on I used my bad experiences to show how I overcame them. I wanted to be able to speak to others like me. I wanted to encourage them.

And man did it feel so lovely to be reconnected to a piece of myself.

Overall, writing has been my friend, my supporter, my coping mechanism, and it has been my gateway to be able to come to MSA.

I have a lot of love towards writing. I have overcome obstacles with it. I have been empowered with it.

I want writer’s, just like myself, to be proud of how far writing has taken them. Most importantly,to keep on falling in love with writing, and continue working towards their dreams.

 

 

 

August 4th, 2003 was indeed a good day…one might even say, a magical day. Why? Because it’s my birthday!

Fast forward 15 years: July 27, 2019. This was the actual day I celebrated my 16th birthday because I would leave for school on my birthday weekend.
For my 16th, I decided to have a game and a movie night outside in my backyard. This idea originally sounded fun to me because I always wanted to go to a drive-in movie. What would be even better would be a drive-in movie and my friends all in my backyard.

So on the day of the event, I woke up early in the morning and went to get my nails done. My makeup appointment followed that. I went for a soft- glow-glam-look with gold glitter eyes. I proceeded to go home and get dressed in my birthday attire. For my outfit, I had a white crop blouse with ruffled ends and high waisted bell bottom jeans both from Forever 21. I paired it with a pair of leopard open toe heels. All I can say is…your girl was looking bomb!

Shortly some of my friends arrive and we went to take pictures at the Renaissance Mall.

Around 7 o’clock the party started so we made our way back to my house. As I opened the front door of my house to find rose gold and white decor including balloons in all quarters of the living room. A huge birthday banner across the dining room wall with a sweet table below it including chocolate covered Rice Krispies, Oreos, pretzels, and a light pinked flowered icing cake to top it all off.

The rest of the party soon arrived with great smiles we played games like Jenga, Bummer Ball, dice, etc. Later, we ate, danced to some bops, and shared some laughs while watching Scary Movie 2 on a projector outside.

Before I knew it, it was 11 o clock and it was time to say goodbye to my friends. Of course, this was emotional considering I it would be a while until I saw most of them. I tried to stay strong and hold back my tears, but I couldn’t. My tears weren’t all sad. It was a mixture between missing these dear people and being hopeful that I will see them again soon.

Nonetheless, the party was a success and had good energy throughout the whole event. I was happy that I got to enter my 16th year with the ones I love.

On August 6, we experimented with black out poetry. And as the school year launched on this day, I found my poem particularly ironic. I would rather submit an image, but I marked out a few letters by accident. So I hope a typed replacement will suffice.

---

This year

is

depicting

feeling

and

some creative role.

Existing 

is

now on display.

---

In many ways does this poem resonate with me. One presents itself clearly: the mention of creativity. This year, my junior year, I reside at Mississippi School of the Arts (MSA). Two others schools have aided me academically, but this upper high school stands as the first to provide artistic education, available to me and other talented individuals that survived admission. Not only does this environment tolerate creativity, it also encourages artistic growth and out-of-the-box thinking. So I would assume that a creative role is inevitable, and I am thrilled about developing my writing and progressing as an author.

Another word caught my attention: feeling. Although getting accepted into MSA requires artistic potential, I have always struggled with favoring the left side of my brain. I am aware that the theory of left-brain and right-brain thinking is not exactly science, but consider it from a metaphorical perspective. Even now I utilize this left side. I would rather branch out and express myself in vivid poetry, or I would rather experiment with quirky blog prompts. But I refrain because the logic says otherwise, arguing that the notion is simply too extravagant, too unnecessary, too “out-there”. The right side, mumbling something about emotional expression, fades from view, and I trust the left side even though I do not always want to. But here, immersed in this environment, logic does not feel so complacent, and I await change and the appearance of unhinged artistic expression. Granted, filters should always remain, but I would rather creativity not mumble.

To the other artists experiencing an infestation of logic: I encourage you to find a community or environment that inspires you, even if that means sitting by a window instead of something wild (like spontaneously moving to another country). Do not allow your artistic voice to wither.

Finally, to conclude my first blog edition, I want to address the ending of the poem: “Existing is now on display”. This resonates with me the most, as it partially defines the life of an artist. We almost exist on display, the products of our creativity self-reflective. Even if we aim to capture an idea or another person, a piece of us will always find its way in; it is inevitable. Writers especially leave a bit of themselves in every page, and I find that particularly beautiful.

Well, existing is now on display, I assume. So exist greatly and with purpose.