Author: Michael Coleman

Want to know what frustrates me? Since the age of four, I have slaved every day for eight hours over work that I will never have to worry about again, after I graduate from high school. Don’t get me wrong, when I first began schooling, I absolutely loved it. I was able to go sit in a class with my friends for eight hours, say my ABC’s and 123’s, take a nap, go home, and let my mama take care of me. Who wouldn’t want to live that life? Then, as the years went on, my days slowly but surely seemed to have gotten longer. Yes, I still had my friends, but we were doing more than saying our ABS’s and 123’s, and my nap was taken away. Can you imagine as a kid how that feels?

By the fifth grade, I was not only doing more than saying my ABC’s and 123’s, but I was fighting for a top spot in my class. I can not speak for anyone else’s school, but the students I was mentally fighting with were pretty dang good. The teachers would use reverse psychology on us to make us more competitive with one another. It got to the point where assignments and tests were no longer assignments and tests. It was just another “to-do” of who could finish first with the most correct.

And now that I am close to the end of my first educational journey, I am starting to become a little terrified. I am really about to be out here, living in this cruel world, alone. I will be without my mother, my grandmother, my handful of “friends”, and any other form of guidance. I will be out here making decisions for myself without having to check with anyone and all of that. You know, now that I am really getting it all out, I think I am a little more than terrified. I am scared out of my mind. I have so many un-answered questions about this whole living on my own situation. Where do I stay? What will I do, career wise? When will my family start? How will I deal with that? So much runs through my mind with this particular topic, it is literally ridiculous.

Do you know what is even more frustrating? The fact that I know this. It literally crosses my mind every single day. “After this year and after I graduate, I will never need this stuff again?” Somebody has got to understand what I am feeling.

Lately, I’ve been finding myself singing a whole lot more than usual. So much that I’ve seemed to have conjured up an old hobby, re-song-writing. About a year or two ago, I would find a song I really liked and re-write it. It was pretty good then, so let’s see if the skill is still there.

Losin’ Control Re-Write

He’s falling in love now, losing control now

Fighting his truth, trying to hide

But I think it’s alright

Yeah, I think it’s alright

He’s falling in love now, losing control now

Fighting his truth, trying to hide

But I think it’s alright

Yeah, I think it’s alright

He’s fallen and he doesn’t know where love be

‘Cause his last relationship flew right past me

Accusations and we act like we don’t know why

Yeah we’re waiting on him, he’ll tell us on his own time

Should’ve ended it before it started

All he ever got was broken hearted

He got cheated on, tried to flip it back on me like a victim

Now we’re all alone and starting over

Now he’s got baggage on his shoulder

But the new guy really loves me

He loves me, but he doesn’t know himself anymore

He’s falling in love now, losing control now

Fighting his truth, trying to hide

But I think it’s alright

Yeah, I think it’s alright

He’s falling in love now, losing control now

Fighting his truth, trying to hide

But I think it’s alright

Yeah, I think it’s alright, boy

Despite his past, he can’t help the attraction

He tells me that I’m nothing like the last one

He relives in every way what love was

He fell for me and still hasn’t found love

Every now and then, he goes off, though

Beating on his chest like a bongo

I understand he’s coming from a hurt place

He never answers all the questions on the survey

Doesn’t get jealous, doesn’t break trust

Doesn’t call me, after hang-ups

He gives me everything I ever wanted

And even though he still feels haunted

He’s falling in love now, losing control now

Fighting his truth, trying to hide

But I think it’s alright

Yeah, I think it’s alright

He’s falling in love now, losing control now

Fighting his truth, trying to hide

But I think it’s alright

Yeah, I think it’s alright

I know I may be a little rusty, but you get the point. I’d consider myself a little poetic, don’t you think?

As I stated in my last blog, 2019 is the year of taking the lessons I learned in 2018 and applying them. Keep that in mind while reading this….

New Year: As of 12:00:00 AM January 1, 2019, it is no longer 2018. Get it? Got it? Good! 

Same Me: I was born February 28, 2002 at 7:31 P.M. at GLH. Just because the time and date changes, does not mean I have to change to. Therefore, the New Year, New Me thing does not apply to me. What I will do though is grow, which is what we all should thrive to do every-day.

New Routine: In order for me to grow, I have to put myself on a routine or schedule that involves all things that will enhance my mental, emotional,and physical traits. Of course just because I put myself on a routine or schedule, does not mean everything in my life is going to happen according to that. But, that is where the growth comes in. How do I deal with the unexpected things that take place? 

Here is my routine/schedule:

Mental: Around October or November, I started having frequent headaches. I used to wonder why, but now I know. It was because I constantly remembered EVERYTHING I had to do/know. I never wrote anything down, I would just keep it all in my head. So now, as soon as I recognize that something has to be added to my day or week, I put it in my calendar on my phone and set two reminders for it. That way, I can go through the day only worrying about what I am focused on at that time. It is still a lot, but a lot easier. 

Physical: Around November, I started noticing that either my pants were shrinking or I was gaining weight. Come to find out, I was gaining weight. When we went home for Christmas/New Year’s break, I went to the doctor and found out that I have gained 40+ pounds. I wish I could blame it on this school, but I can’t. It was all me. So, before my birthday, February 28, I will tone this weight. I don’t want to lose it because the weight looks good on me. I just need it all to not look like it’s just there. So, I am committing to exercise everyday. I WILL…. stretch, walk for 4 minutes and 25 seconds, do 16-25 squats, run for 2 minutes and 16 seconds, do this crazy leg/stomach/back workout, lift 40-60 pounds of weights, do the Move Your Body challenge, and run in place EVERYDAY! I think by the end of January, I should be fine, don’t you think? 

Emotional: I was an emotional WRECK by November. Guess what? Now…. “I PUT MY FEELINGS ON SAFETY!” < Ella Mai Reference! I’m returning to people whatever energy I receive from them, PERIOD. 

Thanks for reading/skimming…. 

Last year, during oratorical season, the directors would pick four amendments. On the day of the competition, they would randomly pick one the day of the competition. Recently, I wanted to see if I still had the ability to write on one the amendments. This is what I came up with....

Article 2, Section 4

Article 2, Section 4 states, “The president, vice president, and all other civil officers shall be removed from office on impeachment for the conviction of treason, bribery, and any other high crimes or misdemeanors.”

It is amazing how we hold politicians to such high regard. And as a civil officer, elected by the people, you are either for us or against us. So, treason is the ultimate betrayal to one’s country. Treason is unacceptable. Bribery, whether giving or receiving, jeopardizes the government’s relationship with the people. Bribery is unacceptable. In the same manner, other high crimes and misdemeanors cause ethical issues.

To impeach the president, vice president, or any other civil officer, two-thirds of the House of Representatives must vote that the accused should be impeached. The first step of the process is for the person being accused to stand before the House of Representatives, where they will decide whether or not the person should be impeached. After that, the accused will stand in trial where the Chief of Justice will serve as the judge, officials of the House of Representatives will serve as prosecutors, and the Senate will serve as the jury.

Only three of our presidents have gone through the impeachment process. These three were: President Andrew Johnson, President Richard Nixon, and President Bill Clinton. The first to undergo the impeachment process was President Andrew Johnson because he was accused of violating the Act of Tenure. He escaped impeachment being one vote shy of the two-thirds needed for the conviction. The second to undergo the impeachment process was Richard Nixon because he abused his power as president. He resigned before the Senate could make their final decision. The third and final president to undergo the impeachment process was President Bill Clinton because not only was he accused of abusing his power as president, but was accused of perjury. Much like President Andrew Johnson, he was acquitted after the Senate failed to convict him.

No one, not even the president, vice president, or any other civil officer are above the law. Again, I claim Article 2, Section 4 “The president, vice president, and all civil officers shall be removed from office on impeachment for the conviction of treason, bribery, and other high crimes and misdemeanors.”

Over the summer, I was given the task of writing an essay based on someone who has positively influenced my life. Please read the essay and tell me what you think.

The person who has held the most positive impact on me is Phylicia Harington. She has played a very important role in the upbringing of me. Since 2013, the lessons she has taught me have inspired me to become a better me, every day. For this, I am forever grateful. The three lessons she has taught me area: to be comfortable in my own skin, to give respect in order to get it, and to always make the right decisions for me! Over the years, these lessons have helped me to become a strong and independent young man.

The first lesson is, “You are who you are. There is nothing I, you, or anyone else can do about it. Live baby.” When she spoke these words to me, my thirteen-year-old mind could not fully develop that statement. Lost for words, I asked myself, “How do you feel?” The only thought I had was that this teacher genially cared. She made it crystal clear that accepting who/what we are is the first step of living a happy life.

The second lesson was, “If you want people to respect you, you need to respect them.” She had noticed a change in my behavior as the year progressed, so she spoke these words to me. She went on to say that I would never be satisfied with anyone’s attitude towards me if I always had an attitude. She then told me that it was time I take responsibility fot my actions. I t is not always someone else’s fault as to why I am not having the best day. Although I did not want to heart it, it was the truth. Now, I can honestly say I try not to put the blame on anyone else for my behavior.

The third and final lesson was, “You only live once. Make decisions that are right for you. People will try to get you to do something stupid, but you are not the only one dealing with the consequences. Do understand though, you will make a lot of wrong decisions. Just do not make the same mistake over and over again.” I can honestly say that this has been the biggest fight, for me. I am still working on this, and she spoke these words five years ago. I had to learn that decisions not only affect now, but the near and far future too. It is up to me whether I make good or bad decisions. All I can really say is decisions, decisions.

In conclusion, Ms. Harrington has helped me build my confidence, learn the values of respect, and the importance of decision making. Allowing Ms. Harrington to enter my life was truly one of the best decisions I have ever made. I would not take it back, for anything in the world. Because of these lessons, I live by this quote: “I can, and I will!”

This blog is inspired by a thought that’s been on my mind a lot lately. 

Do you remember when you were younger, everyone asked you this one question: “What do you want to be when you grow up?” Of course because you were so young, you wanted to be anything that could save or help people, right? For example, you may have wanted to be a firefighter, a police officer, or a doctor. But we never hear about the kids who want to be a therapist, or a psychiatric nurse, or even a janitor. These jobs still exist though, don’t they?  

I say all of that to say, for some of the jobs that people settle for, no college degree is required. So, are we making it okay for our youth to unknowingly inquire that they do not need a college degree to be successful? Don’t get me wrong, some families are wealthy enough to live graciously without working hard, but what about those families living paycheck to paycheck? It is not possible to break that cycle, if no hard work is being put in and by hard work, I mean college. But like I said, we’re doing this unknowingly. I have a few suggestions to fix this.

Let’s not steer away from asking kids what they want to be when they grow, continue to ask that, but let’s follow that question with five more questions:

1. What are the requirements for that job? 
2. What if something happens where you cannot fulfill the needs of that job physically anymore, what is your Plan B?
3. If your Plan B deals with using your brain, instead of your body, what college are you going to? 
4. What will you major in? 
5. What’s the pay difference?  

Depending on the age of the child, they will most definite not know the answer to any of these questions. But if we contentiously ask them these questions, they’ll have some type of motivation to go and research the answers. That’s a step closer to getting our youth to be greater than us. A step closer to breaking the cycle. A step closer to them gaining more knowledge. But we can only get there, if we try. 

I know this method works from personal experience. My mother used this method. By middle school, I could tell you what I wanted to be, what I could  be, the pay of both jobs, what colleges offered that field, and so much more. Come on, America, let’s make the generation better than ours. 

This post was inspired by a comment made to me earlier this week. 

The other night, I was talking to someone on the phone. We were discussing some things that have taken place in their life, that they did not necessarily like. They contentiously made it clear that they did not want anyone to care about them because of some things people had done to them in the past. So I told that person, “I know sometimes we feel like we are super-human and do not need anyone or anything, but the reality is, we do. I do not care who or what it is, we all have to depend on someone or something at some point in our lives, even as adults.” That person felt the need to say to me, “No, you do not understand. You are only 16, so you have not really been through anything.”

I thought it would be nice to give that person a friendly reminder as to where I was and what I was doing, and they still felt the same way. It got me thinking, does anyone truly understand the struggles of a teenager, in this day and age because it does not seem like it. Being a teenager in 2018 is not a walk in the park. Let alone a teenager in 2018 who is, what feels like, a million miles away from home. Do not get me wrong, some of the things we are so called “stressed” about, much like being here, we bring upon ourselves. None the less, life happens to all of us.

Let’s break it down. Think about what the average 16-year old may endure; not that much, right? Maybe some family issues, some disagreements between friends, some bullying, maybe struggling in a class or two? Well move them hours away from home with teenagers who are experiencing or have experienced some of the exact same issues and leave them there to stay. I am not saying it is impossible to handle it, but it is a lot.  People need to understand that everyone does not deal with things the same way. Actually, I read this quote the other day and it spoke volumes to this generation, as a whole. 

"The prettiest smiles hide the deepest secrets, the prettiest eyes have cried the most tears, and the kindest hearts have felt the most pain." 

To me, this hold a lot of weight. When it comes to what people go through, especially teenagers, we should just be there for one another because we never truly know what others are going through unless we are there to experience it with them.

 Maybe I am just looking to deep into it, but I am just not a fan of people discrediting others for the things they have gone through based off of a personal opinion/judgement. 

This is an epic poem. People say there is a message in everything and this particular piece has a very powerful message I want to share.

Alongside an old raged building in Mississippi, lay a child. A child balling his eyes out. He screamed for help, thinking no one could hear him. He said, “God, why? At this point, I am ready to give up. Nothing seems to be going right. I have allowed someone to distract me of the one thing I need in life, my education. I’m not performing like I know I can. Plus, I haven’t seen my cousins in about six months now. You know they mean everything to me. They’re my inspiration, my babies, my reason for waking up every morning. I’m miles and miles away from home, away from the only life I knew, away from my mother, the only person I have left. I’m fighting to keep my sanity, but it is hard.”

By the time he pleaded for help, God had realized his child was deeply hurt. He called upon an angel. An angel that he knew could handle the situation perfectly. Her name was Phylicia. Unlike the other angels, she was calm but assertive. He explained the situation in full. Then he said, “I have called upon your talents to help my child. Use your talent of time travel to show him the memorable times.” She accepted the assignment. The first thing she did was pay the child a visit. The conversation went a little something like this:

Phylicia: “Wake up boy, what’s your name?”
The Child: “Who are you?”
Phylicia: “I asked you a question first.”
The Child: “I’m not telling you anything until you tell me who you are and what you want. You know what, I’m calling my mother.”
Phylicia: “Go ahead, you’ll just look crazy. She won’t be able to see me.”
The Child: “And why not?”
Phylicia: “Because I’m an angel, that’s why. Now, what’s your name?”
The Child: “No, I don’t believe you. Prove it.”
Phylicia: “I really hate doing this, but okay….”
She opened a portal and instructed him to grab her hand. He hesitantly did so. The portal led to the time when the child was crying, alongside that raged building.
She said, “Does this look familiar?”
The boy’s mouth dropped in awe.
She chuckled, “Yes, I know. Will you tell me your name now?”
He then asked, “If you’re an angel, shouldn’t you know my name already?”
“I could find your name, but I’d rather you tell me, we’re all the same, in my eyes”, she said.
“Well, it’s Terrell. Now, why are you here?”

She explained what the assignment was. He became afraid, not willing to let her in because he did not know what to expect, but she assured him that everything would be fine.

She asked him what his three main issues were. He told her, “I let someone distract me from my goals, I haven’t seen my cousins, and I’m so far away from my mama.” She said, “Let me take you on a journey. Take my hand.” She opened another portal.
The portal led to the day he received an acceptance letter into a performing arts school. She said, “Look at him. He’s jumping in the middle of the street, yelling about how happy he is. He is not perfect. Just because he got into that school, doesn’t mean he won’t ever mess up again. It just means that he has a new beginning, which calls for new lessons. He is you. You are still that same happy person. You just have to accept it, learn from it, and move forward knowing more than you did the night before.” As he listened to her and watched himself, he shed a tear. “Yeah, I guess you’re right”, he said. “I know.”

She opened another portal. This portal led to a time when he told his little cousins that he would always love them, support them, and be there for them. “Pay attention to him. Look into his eyes. Listen to what he’s saying to them. He meant every word of it. I know they’re young, but they heard and understood you. You cannot change the actions of an adult, but you can be assured that you did your part, which you did. So just wait, it’ll all play out.” He began to smile.

She said, “Let’s go one more place.” She opened the last portal. This portal led to his house, it was empty. She said, “Look. No one is here. That means something. That means you and your mother are working. You both are working hard to accomplish something, whatever it may be. Don’t be upset about it. Trust me, you both will achieve your goals and reconvene. You all are apart for a good reason. Just focus on thriving and making yourself proud.” His smile got wider.

“Thank you so much. I honestly don’t know what I’d do, if I wouldn’t have seen these times. I think I can make it”, Terrell said. “Don’t think it, just do it. Things will get hard, but nothing is too hard to handle”, Phylicia proclaimed.

I have this friend whose a writer, just like me. He recently told me that mostly everything he writes, comes true. I did not believe him until I observed it for myself. As time went on, I realized the things that were happening in his life, had been previously written by him. For example, this first poem he wrote about two weeks ago. It is called The First Time We Met.

“As I walked up to him, he wrapped his strong  arms around me. I gazed deep into his eyes, hoping the moment would never end. I crossed my fingers and whispered thank you to the one above for making my dream come true.  I rested my head on his chest as he spoke sweet things in my ear. A tear shed from my eye, not knowing what this feeling was. It was weird, yet I liked it. We sat under the stars and talked nearly all night long. He held me tighter by the second, assuring me that everything would be alright. And the last thing I remember him saying was,’I promise I will never hurt you.’ My response was, ‘And I promise I will never forget the first time we met.'”

Ironically, the next week, the exact thing happened to him. I was amazed at the possibilities of what he would write next, just to see if he would receive the same outcome. So, that same week, he wrote a poem entitled No, Not You.

“You came and greeted with that hypnotizing smile of yours. Like a fool, I fell for it. I let you hold me and sell me the sweetest of dreams. I had my guard up all along, but somehow, I let you push it right down under my heart. I know I get attached  fast, maybe a little too fast. Did you get what you want and leave? You said no, but should I believe you? You haven’t given me a lot of reasons to not believe you, yet you have. I hope I’m just in my heart about this all because…. no, not you.”

Truth be told, everything he suspected, was true. The only part of this poem that was not true was the other person leaving. Some may call this crazy, freaky, or strange. I consider it to be quite fascinating. My friend is psychic. What do you think?