An excerpt

Like most weeks, going through any possible options I might have for my blog I was stuck with not much to talk about. I keep finding that I never have the right things happen to me for this, or I guess “bloggable” things. Everything that has been happening with me lately has either been too personal to blog about, or not interesting enough. I can never find that good balance between the two, it can feel like such a chore sometimes so for this week I decided to share a small excerpt from a project that I am working on.


Grease plagued the nostrils of the two EMT workers when they entered Jolly’s that evening. It was a staple of Bennings, one of the only fast food places that they had. Having a minute population of just over four-thousand people, Bennings was invisible in the eyes of big corporations, and they were aware of it. 


“Alright sir that will be $11.94,” the teenage cashier stammered, attempting to speak in a chipper tone. 

“Bullshit $11.94, it was $7.50 when I came into this dump last week.” the EMT sputtered.


“Sir, with all due respect I am seventeen years old. I barely have any control in my own job, let alone what your two burgers cost you. You can take it or leave it, I really couldn’t care less.”


“You-” the EMT swiftly being interrupted by his coworker.


“We don’t have time for this Otto”


“John I swear to god if you don’t-”


“I’ll pay,” John said, pulling out a crumpled twenty dollar bill from his jacket pocket.This wasn’t the first time that John had to stop one of Otto’s confrontations from progressing. However John with a towering stature of 6 ‘3 and wide muscular build it wouldn’t have been a very grueling task to break up and situation that might’ve progressed.  


“Would you like to sign up for our awards program, or round up to help contribute to Saint Patricks Children’s Hospita-” He was interrupted by a now apparent scowl that sat on Otto’s face. The wrinkles on his forehead speaking words louder than anything that left the confines of his lips.

The ringing of the cash register echoed throughout the empty establishment, Jolly’s was what John would categorize as a “graveyard restaurant.” An establishment littered with black and white photos of Jolly’s from decades prior as an attempt to hold on to its former glory. Now just a shell of itself.  

If it wasn’t for the constant humming of rain upon the tin roof the restaurant would have been plagued with silence. “Hey Joe can I get two number fives ple-.” The cashier, interrupted with a sudden boom of thunder, fell back. It was as if the thunder had cascaded down from the clouds and behind the counter. It was an odd type of thunder, it wasn’t the kind of thunder that one would hear at the start of a storm, but the kind that one might hear at its climax. 


“Anything new and exciting going on?” John asked casually as he began to flip through his phone. Its small black stature sitting insignificantly within the confines of John’s large palm. However all that this statement was met with was a dismissive chuckle on Otto’s behalf.

The storm continued to roar outside as both men awkwardly scooted into the red and white synthetic leather booth. Jolly’s windows began to vibrate, water cascading down its unwashed exterior, the clouds that were once a light gray now became to stain a deep ashen gray. The sun had begun its descent as they waited impatiently for their food to arrive. 

Gray Fur

So for this week for once I have something to write about. For the last couple of blogs that I have written about I think I have either written about something that resonates with me or something like a show or book that I have been really interested in. But today I want to talk about wish. Now you, like most, might be asking, “who is wish?” I was walking to go out to dinner with a group last night and that is when we saw her. She was walking across the street, small, clean, unaware of any cars that might drive past. But it was only when I signaled her to come over to me and she ran up to me and climbed into my arms did I know that she was different. For years I had never felt compassion for animals like I did for wish, however it wasn’t me who first really got attached to her,my girlfriend danni, walking beside me, took the kitten from me and played with her as we walked, holding her in her arms. Eventually I knew that I had to be the voice of reason, telling her that we needed to go. So we put her down and continued walking, my girlfriend stopping on multiple occasions to cradle the kitten that was walking at our feet. Finally we said our goodbyes and went into the restaurant, but as we got our food my girlfriend’s growing worry the kitten got the better of her. And as her and I left our friends at the table to go check on a kitten that I knew wasn’t going to be there. But as we opened the door we saw her, sitting there, chewing on rocks and dead beatles that she saw on the ground. But since we weren’t allowed to be out past nine we told our friends to go ahead while Danni and I scraped together the food we had and left it for her. As we crossed the train tracks past Georgia blues she grabbed my hand, “she’s not going to be safe here, can we please take her back?” All hesitation that I once had suddenly washed away and without thinking I crossed back over the street and scooped wish into my arms. The walk back was peaceful, looking up at the stars as wish began to fall asleep. And finally as we arrived back we played with a now rested kitten. A little ball of energy attempting to take in her new surroundings. It had been a long time since I had felt something like that before, the type of compassion that I felt for that cat. And after some convincing we managed to get a staff member to get in contact with a friend who she knew took care of cats before sending them to the shelter. So with a heavy heart about an hour later we handed off wish, knowing that not only us, but her had to keep going on. But walking back to my dorm I wasn’t sad she was gone, I wasn’t exactly happy but something inside of me felt different. Time was passing and in that moment I felt like that small cat, the feeling that something new inside of me was starting the same way her entire life was about to.

The Little Things

When looking through what I wanted to speak about this week I found my mind wandering to things that didn’t seem that significant.

 “I need to do my laundry”

 “I need to follow up on that ACT prep course ” 

“Should I take a nap?”

They’re all questions that I have thought about before, however I always thought it in a different sense, the thought that one day it would be the norm for me, one day I would find myself with these thoughts and not enveloped with the idea that it would one day be my life.

These thoughts that I think of often have become more enveloping in my day-to-day lifestyle. It’s an odd feeling. A calm one, I’ve always found myself trying to focus on the things coming up in my life. Whether it be something that is important that I am nervous for, or something I am really excited for, something that might change the monotony of life, but in the past few weeks it has begun to shift, my perspective that is. I’ve begun to see things more clearly, or at least my need for that feeling has begun to dissipate, the feeling of constantly searching for a new high. Now I find myself beginning to appreciate the more mundane aspects of my day, whether it be getting to read pieces of literature that I enjoy, or the smell of a good meal that is being emitted. 


Taking time to write this is another example of finding the extent of finding emotion in the small things that you do. As I sit and write this there are so many things that are towering over me, anxiety that I once thought would never return yet I find myself focused on the story, focused on the book I am reading, focused on what I am going to get for dinner tonight. 

Now that I find myself stopping a search that I once thought would never end I finally have time to take a breath. A breath that blows away every thought in my mind, wishing, hoping, and knowing that even the most towering of emotions could not destroy me. 


Now as I sit alone writing this I find that I have found company with myself, company with the little things. The mug on my desk, the sound of the AC blaring in my ears as the cool air envelops me. I’ve grown.


So, whenever I’m stuck in a place where I have no idea what I am going to write about I find myself going back to things that I enjoy, or at least pieces of media that I enjoy. Lately I have been doing a lot of schoolwork, so I really haven’t had the time to watch, let alone take in movies or tv shows. But this week was an exception, a new show came out that I need to talk about, and if you’ve read the title then you can see, it is Fionna and Cake. 


For those who do not know Fionna and Cake is a limited time spin off series that is airing on FX, it is a spin off, or some might even say a sequel, of one of Cartoon Network’s most notoriously popular and successful shows, Adventure Time. I remember watching adventure time a lot as a kid, however since it was in cable format as well as the fact my brain hasn’t developed enough to even be able to appreciate the true beauty and intricacy that this show has to offer. It was only when I was about 12 was when I began to really watch, start from the beginning, understand what the story was truly about. The fun part about a small time in this show is that it wasn’t really about anything. For the first two out of ten seasons there really wasn’t an underlying storyline that the show adhered to, it was more of just a lighthearted piece of media that both kids and young adults could enjoy. It provided an enriching setting and set up characteristics of the story as well as specific characters that stood out more than any other cartoon network show.


Throughout this post I’ve tried to make an effort to not include spoilers and keep the actual storyline very vague but the topic that I am about to touch on does include slight spoilers, so just keep that in mind. One final thing that I want to bring to light is the character development throughout all ten seasons of the show as well as the two spins off shows. The pictures I am about to show reflect not just the physical changes that you see throughout the show but the emotional as well.

Image result for finn and ice king✨️monkey see, monkey do✨️ — I keep seeing people talking about how its  sad...




In conclusion I think that both of these pictures encapsulate what the main underlying theme in this universe of shows are, change. Change, whether it is negative or positive, is going to be a prevalent part of all of our lives. And I think bringing it to light in the eyes of children is one of the most important things that this show can offer.

The Integration of Advanced and Remedial skills Portrayed in Film

So, for this week’s blog I wanted to talk about another show that has been sticking to the confines of my brain like glue. A show that I think I can really relate to in ways that other people my age might not be able to. The show I am talking about Fx’s The Bear. The Bear surrounds our protagonist, Carmen Berzado, Carmen is a world-renowned chef, known for working around the world in some of the most prestigious restaurants. But after the sudden suicide of his brother Micheal, he finds himself back in Chicago, attempting to run his now late brother’s restaurant. 

I personally really enjoyed this series for a number of reasons, one of the most prominent being that I was able to appeal to some of the situations that were provided. This is because I have always had a very close and intimate relationship with the restaurant industry. Whether it was as a member of the wait staff, or member of the kitchen crew, I have seen both worlds of the restaurant industry and I would say that it really deepened my connection with the characters and the plotline. 


A very interesting plot point that is explored in this show that I don’t think any other show has taken the liberty of ever trying to tackle is the collision of ethics throughout the advanced and the less experienced aspect of the restaurant community.  Carmen, once being known as one of the most prominent chefs in the world, now finds himself trying to implement values and systems that are almost exclusively used in high class kitchens. This does not go over well with the staff and a large portion of the conflict of the first season is Carmen trying to find a balance of holding authority over his staff while also trying to understand the many perspectives that he is provided with.


Some staff members become more accustomed to these strict ideologies faster than others, such as Marcus. Marcus is easily convinced that it would be in his best interest to listen to what Carmen has to say after being given advice from him that proves to be correct almost instantly.

However, there are examples of characters that did not react well to these new changes, however it was not from a place of laziness, or from a place of distance from these new tendencies. But from an emotional standpoint, Richie is one of the main victims to this ideology. Richie, being very close with Micheal, now sees the integration of Carmen’s new system as just another aspect of him losing his friend. “This is your brother’s house” is a line that is said as early as the first episode and I think that it is the perfect reflection of Richie’s inability to change through the entire first season as well as a small section of the second. Another really important aspect to look into when it comes to trying to interpret the differentiations between both styles of cooking is when you compare and contrast the first and second season. The first season is essentially Carmen trying to find his way around the chaos and finding a way to fix it. While the second season surrounds the different characters slowly growing their passion for cooking and watching the restaurant slowly morph the establishment that it is now. 

Image result for the bear on hullu season two

In conclusion I think that I am going to try to talk about this show more, I think that just giving a brief description of the main problem without going into the true problems that each character faces is an injustice to what the entire show stands for. I love so many of the characters created, and I think expanding on what makes them so interesting and well written would be in my best interest. 

Development of Artistic Ideologies through the Years

So, this week I was kind of at a loss for what I even wanted to talk about. I brainstormed about speaking about philosophers that I’ve been reading up on lately. I was thinking of just writing a 400-word monologue, honestly, I was contemplating just going on a giant tangent on Goya and his black paintings, but I think I found something to talk about that has a little bit of all those aspects. That being a show called “Downtown,” and of course if you have heard of this show before then you would be skeptical. “How could something that presents itself so vulgar, plagued with such simplicity, be able to appeal to deep philosophical ideologies”. That can be answered when you look within the subtext of the show itself. 

The show Downtown by MTV surrounds our protagonist Alex, a 22-year-old man who works at a printing press, living in New York City. The largest factor that contributes to the differentiation between its meaning and its outward presentation is the persistent theme of sex, drugs, and crime. Yet it is important that these themes are a part of the show because it is what brings emphasis to the importance to both the underlying themes as well as the personality of Alex. Alex is not the same as other characters in that show, he seems to be more sheltered and less willing to go out and expose himself to the culture that was the late 1990s. However, there are breaks in his original character that serve as very important aspects of the way the show approaches certain issues and people’s reaction to them. For example, in season one episode four, “insomnia”, Alex loses his ability to sleep for two days, and on the third night he has become someone that is almost unrecognizable. This episode, in my opinion, aligns almost perfectly with Goya descent into artistic madness. The lack of something so rudimentary in the human mind can change a person so drastically. 

Image result for alex downtown mtv insomniaImage result for alex downtown mtv insomnia


Another way that I think that he relates to Goya was the way that neither of them seemed to adapt very well to the ever-changing landscape of the modern world. Goya, once a well renowned imperial artist now was nothing but an old man that never left his home. The governmental and social changes of the world caught up with Goya, and instead of letting them overtake him he cut himself off. That’s where he created his final pieces, within the confines of his own reaction to things that he had no control over. Alex does the same thing, attempting to isolate himself from a world in which he is a prisoner in.

I think that this is just one of the many examples of ways that modern and historical art and media still portray similar ideologies. Even throughout the passage of time we are able to keep ideas relevant.

learning in lonesome


I think that being at this new school I haven’t been giving myself enough time to be alone. My sophomore year was spent predominantly alone and I think I grew exponentially as a person. I think that for a long time I was afraid of being alone with myself, maybe it came from a place of self-discontentment or a place of hyperactivity but regardless I put it all aside for my second year of highschool. I made an effort to be friendly, when someone said hi to me I would wave in return and I kept my grades up but I really stayed out of the social loop. And for this week’s blog I think I’d like to share some of things I learned from that experience.

First off I think in this time I was better able to develop my taste in media, or film more specifically. I had a lot more time to myself so when I wasn’t studying I was watching movies. I really, really value that small chapter in my life for a number of reasons, or I guess a number of movies. Examples of this include movies like, Donnie Darko, The Perks of being a Wallflower, or even more known titles Grave Encounters or Creep. While I have always made an effort to take time out to appreciate the themes being portrayed in works during this time it was as if they resonated with me so much easier and faster.Whether it was how I could relate to how painfully human the acting was in movies like Creep, or the accuracy of the coming of age masterpiece that is the perks of being a wallflower.


Another positive aspect of spending all this time with myself was that I was finally able to really take some time to get to know myself. I think that after Covid the past few years of my life have just been a complete frenzy. So when everything began to slow down it’s almost as if I was getting to know someone that I had never been acquainted with. Through this time I learned who I was, while also being able to grow and heal from the person that I once was as well. 


The final positive aspect of being alone that I would like to touch on is being able to better understand people.For the longest time I was afraid that I talked over people, even if they weren’t talking I felt as if when I had something to contribute I never truly listened and made an effort to understand who they were. I think that it is a lot easier to love someone that way, there are never too many aspects in which you’ll find yourself not loving someone.

Artistic Obsession

I have found that a handful of critiques and artistic connoisseurs will identify different types of art into two categories, performing and nonperforming. I think that while this is an accurate interpretation and helpful indicator on identifying art, I think that performance pieces and performance artists are a prominent example of an artform that doesn’t adhere to that principle. While most people would automatically put performance pieces into the performing category, I think that they have just as important of an influence on the nonperforming artistic community as well.


Some who are reading this might be wondering what a performance piece even means, and at the expense of sounding like I’m giving a bad valedictorian speech I will give you a definition. Webster’s dictionary defines performance pieces as an art piece, exhibition, or installation that is created directly by the artist, collection of artists, or others. Performance art is often seen as what’s done when other more traditional art forms are not enough to get the artist’s point across. And while there are a number of prominent names in the world of artistic performance one of the most notable is Tehching Hsieh.

Hsieh was born on December 31st, 1956, in the southern region of Taiwan. He was the first of 15, growing up he said that while he thoroughly enjoyed learning as well as researching things that piqued his interest, such as philosophy and classical art, he never made very high marks in school. After graduating he served a mandatory three-year term in the Taiwanese military. It was only after his time served that he unveiled his first work titled “Jump Piece.” In this work Hseich recorded himself jumping a two-story building in Taiwan, twisting both of his ankles in the process. This would be his first and final piece that he performed in Taiwan, because in the early 1970’s he immigrated to New York City in a very unconditional manner. Hseich trained to become a sailor in 1974, eventually being granted a spot on a Taiwanese oil rig that was on route to the United States. However, Hsiech did not complete the trip, abandoning ship just miles out from Philadelphia he swam to shore and backpacked to New York.

Hsieh or (Sam) spent over four years in New York before beginning any art. He spent time as a dishwasher, cleaner, as well as waiter. Hsieh reported in The Guardian years later “When I got to New York, it took two years to find Soho. I’m illegal and I’m afraid of taking the subway. I only know Washington Square and I only know people doing portraits in the street, I don’t know this art scene.” It was only in 1978, over four years later, that Hsieh began the first of a series of five year-long pieces. This performance piece was titled “The Cage Piece.” Hseih created a homemade wooden cage which he encased himself in, he did not allow himself to speak, read, write, or consume any piece of media. The only interaction that he was permitted was once a day his colleague entered the room to empty his waste, give him food, and take a photograph of him to commemorate the process, his colleague was not allowed to give Hsieh any materials or speak a word to him. 

This was his first and one of his most significant pieces, followed by other works such as The Time Clock Piece, during which he clocked into a time clock every hour for a year. Tehching Hsieh: One Year Performance 1980–1981 (Time Clock Piece ...

The Outdoor Piece, a performance piece in which Sam did not go inside for the full duration of a year. He lived on the streets, never going inside buildings, shops, or any form of public transportation (cars, buses, subways), the only exception was when he was arrested, but was let off soon after. 

Rope Piece-in this piece he bound himself to a woman for a year, unable to leave her side, however what put this piece apart was that they were not able to touch either.

See related image detail. randian - Doing Time: Interview with Tehching Hsieh

Looking back on all this I think that Hsieh is a true representation of artistic dedication. Whether it is through the harm that his body experienced or the extreme mental anguish that he experienced from a year without sleep I think that there are many people who should aspire to one day reach this level of commitment, of obsession. Because at the end of the day the true meaning of these pieces surrounds the passage of time, and how you shouldn’t waste it. 

The differentiations of A24 in the modern film industry

Since this is one of my first Blog posts, I’ve decided to write about something that I know I’m familiar with, movies. Specifically, a movie studio that I have been a passionate supporter of for the past few years of my life. This studio of course is A24. Like most people I learned about A24 through some of their famous horror titles like Hereditary or Midsommar, but I have found that if you dig a bit deeper than you will find yourself among some of the most incredible pieces of modern twenty-first century film.

There are a number of contributing factors to the rise of A24 but one of the biggest being its unique values that helped develop it as a prominent production studio. A24 was founded in late 2012 by Daniel Katz, David Fenkel, and John Hedges, all three being prominent names in the studio production and finance industries. Having this prior experience, they were able to start farther ahead than most of the bigger names in the studio production industry at the time. Having that experience they were able to make risky decisions smarter, decisions that began with their untraditional way of picking up movies. That being that they would send members of their relatively small team at the time to attend some of the world’s most prestigious film festivals and pick up films as seen.


Another very prominent aspect that contributed to the individuality and integrity of the films that they produce is also the almost unlimited amount of artistic initiative that they give to the directors of their respected films.  I have personally found that giving more freedom to writers and directors is what makes such an incredible film its own personality. Big box office flicks might have a wider appeal to bigger audiences, but it strips any artistic integrity from the piece itself, whether it comes from a place of constant restrictions from big production companies or the need to appeal to a larger audience so you can receive a larger profit.

Going down this tangent I have started I think it is necessary to explain my predisposition contempt with bigger movie corporations. Though some of my favorite childhood movies come from such large corporations such as Dreamworks and Disney, now that I’ve grown and matured, I have become more aware of the past as well as current underlying issues with these larger production companies. Past examples of these controversies might include the problematic history of Disney’s past portrayal of people of color in their films, or even more recent issues like Disney’s attempt to monopolize holidays that have been held culturally significant to people for many years. 


A24 is most notably known in the film community as being the producer of very psychological and modern film, modern in a way that a large community of people might call pretentious. Films such as: The Killing of a Sacred Deer and The Lighthouse, have experienced a large number of critiques from general audiences for not adhering to specific guidelines that cater to larger audiences. However, I would say that this comes predominantly from a group of people that aren’t sufficiently educated on the topic. A24 has created some of the best movies that I have ever had the privilege of watching. Notable titles such as Lady Bird, Hereditary, Moonlight, Everything Everywhere all at once, are just a few of the names that have received prestigious film awards such as best picture, best performance as well as an extensive number of academy awards. 


Even though I think that this post was relatively informational I really hope that I can go farther in depth with a number of the movies they produced and the artistic backgrounds and interpretations of those films.