junior literary – Literary Arts Blogspace

Music Galore (˃ꇴ˂)

In my last post, I had gone on a little rambling of my favorite artists and songs from them. I decided to expand on that section furthermore by dedicating this post to songs and artists I recommend. I will preface this before moving on, my music taste it diverse. A little bit of everything mixed into a pot. So, I don’t believe that all of my recommendations will land well with everyone. Most of my recommendations within this post are within the rowdy realm like metal, screamo, etc ( •̯́ ₃ •̯̀)

Without a further ado, here we go ٩(˶´༥`˶)و

About a year ago, I had dabbled into punk music. Most specifically, d-beat, it’s a music genre that has inspired Crust Punk. For a little bit of background, Crust Punk is a fusion genre between extreme metal and anarcho-punk. Songs within this specific genre contains lyrics of real-life problems and the vocalist’s stance on it. All discussion within songs is primarily anti-capitalism, environmentalism, anarchism, etc. There have also been other discussions like feminism, veganism, and animal rights sung within this genre. D-beat takes its name from a band named Discharge (D-beat means Discharge-beat) I’ll link some songs that fit under this genre.

Drunk with power – Discharge
Police Bastard (covered by Pesti!) – Doom
My Meds Aren’t Working – Dystopia

I also recommend ‘Number One Hypocrite’ by Dystopia (✧∇✧)

Indie holds a piece of my heart (♡ˊ͈ ꒳ ˋ͈) The artist I’ll say I listen to the most within this genre is Alex G or Big Thief, but I also listen to Black Box Recorder a whole lot too. Indie music, also known as independent music, is characterized by creative freedom and a DIY mentality to it. This makes a varying about of musical approaches, lyrics, how they’re sung, the instruments, etc. Here’s my recommendations (✧0✧) Each artist has their own section with songs I’ve selected. I’ll underline the ones I’d recommend the most.

Black Box Recorder – Kidnapping an Heiress, The Art of Driving, Child Psychology
Mitski – Cop Car, Drunk Walk Home (Live version), Last words of a shooting star
Alex G – Hope, I’m not like the other girls (unreleased), Forever
Big Thief – Paul, Not (live), Vampire Empire (Demo)

In my previous blog, I discussed a lot of metal. So, I’ve decided to talk about it furthermore.

My love for metal has been a thing since I was young. Skillet was my first exposure to it when I was 7 years old. It died down, but then in 2023 a friend introduced me to Deftones. Deftones had made me love metal more than I can ever state. I have a collection of merch like shirts and CDs ( ˊᵕˋ )♡ I own almost all albums, but I still have another eight albums to get. I also own some Korn and System of a Down albums along with a Skillet and an Evanescence album. I haven’t been to any concert yet, but I hope to go to one soon.

Scream of The Butterfly – Acid Bath
Duct Taped to a Flagpole – Party Cannon
Tavern – Netherwalker
Misanthropy – Decalius
Absurdism – Glistening
I’m Sorry – I will always remember
Siege Tower – Curta’n Wall
Rabid – Mortician
Mascara – Deftones

I feel like a cornball for liking Screamo, but this genre is so good please trust me ( °ㅁ°) There have been some Screamo songs that have gotten popular, but only for a certain part. It does mess with me a little because there are songs that are genuinely the best songs ever (੭ ;´ ⌂ `;)੭

Metamorphosis – Your Arms Are My Cocoon
let’s get married – Your Arms Are My Cocoon
To Remember – septemberistheonlytimeidontthinkofyou
Everybody tells me nothing – beforeyouleave
San Francisco – IHS
i experienced ego death on an nde thread – foxtails
embers – Dead Butterflies
When We Turn To Dust – noragami
好きです – that same street

I love sharing my favorite genres and specific songs within these genres ₍₍⚞(˶>ᗜ<˶)⚟⁾⁾ I hope maybe I’ve added a few songs to your playlist or made you a fan of some of these artists. What do you think of some of these tracks? Do you recommend any songs for me to take a listen to ( •̯́ ^ •̯̀) I’d love to hear what you have to say!

Story Time: Missing or Dead (pt 1?)

Hey y’all, I’m planning on doing something a little different for these next couple blogs. If you saw my last one, you know that I gave some context on the cult figures. Following that theme, this week’s blog is going to be a part of a story series written by me. (please give any help feedback) I’m going to give you some more of Elijah’s story in a moment. Before I do, I want to say that you will be lost if you didn’t read my prose piece or my last blog. Sorry not sorry cause I’m not forcing you to be here. So, without further ado. Please enjoy.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

…As Elijah sets the letter down, a vibration escapes from his phone running on top of his skin. Retrieving it from his pocket, his screen lights up with a picture of his uncle dragging an unconscious Autumn on the ground. Before having time to process the scene in front of him, another message rings out. They’re coordinates; followed by a message from the same number that sent the photo, saying:

Here. Save her.

Autumn! Elijah’s eyes widening as he stares into the blinding light of his phone. Without wasting another minute, he pulls the nearest hoodie over his head, grabbing the car keys from their glass home beside the door. He drives north into the empty night for half an hour or so. The GPS signals the car to take a slight right leading off the smooth pavement and onto a chaotic path cluttered with the forest’s overgrowth.

As Elijah was driving, his phone sang with another unknown message. The text contained detailed instructions. They explained to Elijah that once he pulled off the road to drive for about five minutes. After those few minutes passed, he will see a small opening; there he will find a manchineel tree marked with a red ‘S.’ Elijah was then instructed to park his car under the tree and walk for about two kilometers. Which he did.

Elijah did everything the text told him to with a pounding heart and a tear stained face. He was surrounded by trees, stuck in an unfamiliar place and vulnerable to the world encapsulating him, yet his heart hammered along for another. Dread came and blocked all reason and logic in Elijah’s mind. The last person he held concern for was himself as he ran blindly, the trees morphing into fuzzy blobs of deep greens and browns. His sweat, cold and bitter as it fell from down the nape of his neck; he continued onwards leaving all his hesitation locked within his car, only stopping when his narrow path finally broke into a clearing once more. This glade is bigger than the previous one. It houses a barn that’s caught between the teeth of youth and the jaws of time. Sitting neatly in the center as its dim eave lights create a moat, distinguishing the mysteries of dark from those living in the light.

Relief shoots through Elijah’s heart, slowing the rhyme ever so slightly. This must be it. After catching his breath, Elijah crawls closer and closer to the barn, attempting to invade the innocent light without detection. In this moment, Elijah’s delusions finally dissolve allowing reality and reason to flood over him. His pace comes almost to a stop as he weighs every option.

crack. His blood runs cold.

“Damn it.” A familiar voice says close to Elijah’s ear. Without giving him time to react, the stranger shoves Elijah forwards forcing him into the light. He tries to fight back, but the stranger won’t allow him the opening to strike. Instead he is pinned to the wall with a thud, knocking the remaining air from his lungs.

As they face one another, both pairs of eyes searching the others for answers, the stranger’s confident grapes suddenly falters.

“Elijah?” The stranger cries in disbelief. “No. You’re supposed to be at home. How did they find you?” He adds, thick panic layering each sentence.

“Uncle Riche… where is she?” Elijah pants out angrily. “Where is Autumn?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ok thanks y’all. This is all for this week, but tune in next week to see what happens next to Elijah, Uncle Riche and Autumn.

(also I hope nothing messed up when I copy and pasted this)

The art of teen drama shows

This is something I am disgustingly over-educated in. I’ve seen it all. XO kitty, my life with the Walter boys, The summer I turned pretty, even Ginny and Georgia. I’m a sucker for something that I can watch without using any of the important parts of my brain. The lower the budget of the show, the better. I personally tend to stick with the Netflix originals.

If you’re a teenage girl you’ve probably seen at least one of the “To all the boys but I’ve loved before” movies. Kitty was Laura-Jean’s annoying little sister who sent the letters. XO Kitty is a spin-off revolving around Kitty as she moves to Seoul, Korea to go to a school called KISS. (Korea Independent School of Seoul).

Kitty had an online boyfriend who also went there named Dae. Kitty made the dumb decision to NOT tell Dae that she not only got into KISS but also was planning to surprise him AT KISS. Ugh. When she arrived at KISS, she learned that Dae, in fact, had a girlfriend there. This was the first major conflict in the show, and after that it never ends. It’s dramatic plot point after dramatic plot point. It has me hooked.

Another show I’ve been into as of late is called “My Life with the Walter Boys.” It is so stupid, but so addicting. The show follows a girl named Jackie, who has this tragic backstory that causes her to move to a small town in Colorado called Silver Falls. The people she moves in with is this big family called the Walters. The parents have so many children. I believe it’s 8 children plus two nephews, and now Jackie. 11 kids plus parents all under one roof. When Jackie arrives, she’s immediately interested in two of the brothers. Alex and Cole. This is like my very own team Edward or team Jacob. I’m on Team NEITHER. They both make very toxic boyfriends in their own way. Now, I know I have to pick one. So, I guess it’d depend on the season. Season one I’m going with Alex all day, but season two is going to have to be Cole. See, season one Cole was the bad boy player while Alex was the sweet one, but in season 2 it all kind of switches. Alex goes away all summer to some horse camp and when he comes back, he’s kind of a jerk. Meanwhile, Cole actually starts caring about school. It’s just drama after drama. I love it. Season three just came out, and I can’t wait to see how it unfolds. Okay love ya bye!

I Feel Like Gale Weathers in Scream 4

My favorite movie franchise of all time is Scream. The original helped revolutionize horror movies and is my personal favorite movie. The second was trash. The third had a nice twist ending. The fourth was lack luster and forgettable. The fifth had terrible characters. The sixth had the same problem as the fifth. And the seventh was an amazing breath of fresh air that kept me hooked the entire time.

I’ve learned that when it comes to scream movies, I tend to have a more unpopular opinion. And I could rant about each scream movie for about a thousand words each, but today I want to focus on the fourth movie.

In this movie, the main heroine/villain is Sidney Prescott’s younger cousin, Jill Roberts. (Which is forgettable to the point where I had to search her name just now.) There’s an uninteresting supporting cast of new characters that are nothing but filler for the kill count (dead meat reference.) But these fodder are not what I plan to talk about. I want to focus on the returning cast.

Of course all of the main characters have been slowly killed off up to this point, but we do still get deputy Dewey Riley, Gale Weathers(-Riley), and Sidney Prescott. Neve Campbell is my love, and Dewey is the ray of light that makes this series so beautiful (until he was unceremoniously killed in 5), but I want to focus on Gale Weathers. She and Dewey are married in this movie and she has stepped away from reporting and straight into being a full-time author.

We see her in the opening minutes sitting at her computer, struggling to write. She types nonsense, expressing her frustration. This is a scene I think about a lot. It’s one that plays in my mind every time I sit down at a computer or open book while I just stare blankly, hoping something will come to mind. It’s one that resonates with me on such a deep level, partially because I relate to it, and partially because it’s from my favorite franchise.

Writing can come easy with the right inspiration, but like Gale, it’s not always easy to find that inspiration. She sits at her computer, letting out her frustration with vulgar words, jealous of Sidney Prescott’s fame as an author. And that’s another thing I can sadly relate to with Gale. It’s so easy to see people you’ve known for so long succeed and become jealous of them. It’s something I wish wasn’t so common and easy, but you really can’t help but feel a little bitter.

Gale has always been a bitter character who’s deadset on getting her story, but as far as I remember, she doesn’t take out her frustrations on Sidney (at least not in the 4th movie.) I love watching her grow as a character every time I rewatch the movies. I love seeing her go from snarky with a sore face, to a person Sidney can really trust.

I do admire her dedication to her craft and love seeing her return each movie. But that one scene is so relatable it hurts. I have felt that frustration. I have felt the need to jot down nonsense to release my emotions. Trust me when I say, if I had the ability to not relate to Gale Weathers, I’d be abusing it. Even if I enjoy seeing her grow, she’s still selfish and overly ambitious, and she’s the last person from the original cast that I’d want to see myself in. But the writers conveyed her frustration as an author perfectly, and that’s not something I can ignore.

Overall, I see myself in Gale, no matter how much I wish I didn’t.

I’m done with this topic (for now), but it would be wise to prepare yourselves for more Scream rants in the future.

BYE-

Scream: Every Recurring Character From The Franchise, Ranked

(absolute peak Gale bc I love Courtney Cox so dearly and the first movie will always be the best one)

I am Her and She is Me

I read one of the greatest books of all time my freshman year by accident. I say “by accident” because I wasn’t voluntarily trying to look for it. I was just trying to find myself in literature before I had to grow up. Anyways, the book was titled “Turtles All the Way Down” by John Green. I had never felt so understood before as I did while reading that book. Especially by a complete stranger. Aza Holmes is the star of this book — A teenage girl dealing with grief, anxiety, and most importantly — obsessive compulsive disorder.

Turtles All the Way Down by John Green - Penguin Books Australia Image result for turtles all the way down

People often joke about OCD, so it gets watered down dramatically. Society doesn’t realize that it’s so much more than a feeling of slight discomfort from something being out of order. This condition can range from the obsession with arrangement, harmful ideation, germs, timing, or even texture. The best way to explain OCD to those that don’t suffer from it is — a phobia that someone tries to get rid of completely. For me and Aza, it is germs. This would mean wasting an entire can of Lysol, washing our hands fifteen times in less than half an hour, spiraling thoughts, or even complete meltdowns. This mental illness took complete control over Aza’s life and so many other people’s lives. Real people.

Ocd Compulsions Examples 10 Myths And Facts About Obsessive Compulsive

I’m not using obsessive compulsive disorder as a way to bash those that are ignorant enough to joke about it or the folks that have to suffer from it. Whether they’re diagnosed or not. I reflect on “Turtles All the Way Down” at least once a week and live with OCD daily, so I thought, ‘why not just yap about it for a few paragraphs?”

Any who, earlier in my blog I mentioned “arrangement, harmful ideation, timing and texture”. I know at least one person reading this has no clue what I meant. Arrangement is the most common form of OCD. Biggest to smallest or vice versa, colors, or numbers being in a specific order, etc. You get the gist of it. Harmful ideation probably threw off a lot of people and maybe even concerned some. What I mean by this is someone being afraid of hurting someone else or themselves. They usually hide sharp objects behind locks, pills or anything else that can be used to do damage. Also, I just wanted to state my opinion that this may be one of the worst forms of this disorder. I am so thankful I don’t struggle with it and for those that do, I hope they can get efficient help.

The timing part of OCD is probably a little confusing to some, so an example would be, “If I don’t do this in time, something really bad will happen”. Spoiler: NOTHING IS EVER GOING TO HAPPEN!!!!!!!!!! Shocker, I know.

The last kind of OCD (that I listed; there’s many more variations) would be touching something that feels “wrong”. Technically it isn’t wrong, but you can’t reason with the mental. This may result in touching whatever it was exactly like before to “undo” the feeling, rubbing something else aggressively or getting agitated. If none of this makes sense to you, then congratulations, you probably don’t have obsessive compulsive disorder! But if it did make sense, I totally understand. I don’t have any words of encouragement or advice for you but keep going. You’ve made it this far and have had a lot of ups in your life, so keep moving forward. And thank you to anybody who’s read this — my first ever blog. I hope you enjoyed it more than you might’ve cringed at it.

Everyone Has a Gem in Their Life, Right?

If you don’t know me, then babes come say hi! I promise I won’t bite. But… I want to warn you that if we are friends then you’ll hear a lot about a precious gem in my life. Her name is Ruby Sage and she is my sister. I literally love this girl to the moon and back. In my opinion there is no else on this living planet that is prettier than my sister. Sorry not sorry.

Okay, let’s be so for real now ya’ll. Everyone has a gem in their life. You know, that special someone you unconsciously. The one you involuntarily start looking for in a crowd, even if you don’t mean too. Or heck, it’s the person you turn to when you need a shoulder to lean on. The one you know will answer when you call and listen without judging, or at least if they do judge, it’s in a kind protective way, maybe. Except, my sissy is still learning how to answer my calls the first time (when she isn’t at work), but that’s not the point.

We all have those people or that person. But… Now I have a question for you. Why did you choose them? What makes that person so special, that you place them in a secret category apart from everyone else? What did they do that made you put (almost) all your trust in them?

Actually to be honest I didn’t think I had someone that special to me. That was until someone ‘kindly’ pointed out that I talk about my sister constantly. Which I don’t. Only about 80% of the time, and only when it is relevant. I promise you, I’m not that obsessive. Wait no. I’m not obsessive at all. I just love her, y’all. We have a strong bond. At least I hope.

Okay back to the point of this entire blog. Basically, I’m curious to know if you know who your gem is? Have you ever even thought about it? Or have you taken them for granted? Do you realize how much they mean to you, or how much trust you are allowing them to hold?

Because in reality, I took for granted how much I loved and depended on my sister. I never knew how close I held her until she left for college and wasn’t by me 24/7 anymore. She wasn’t in her room next door able to hold me when I needed to cry or help me when I was stuck. Now I have to call and hope she answers the first darn time, but I wish it wasn’t like that. So, come on babes! Figure out who your gem is and let them know how crazy special they are.

Cause everyone has a gem in their life, right? Or am I just a crazy little white girl?

K, byeeeeeeee!

Adventure Time spin-offs, my very mediocre thoughts

Hey people, this is my first ever blog and I’m very excited to share my thoughts and opinions about whatever I may want to talk about, whether that be books, shows, movies, or poets/writers.

For my first blog, I’d like to talk about the new Adventure Time series, Adventure Time: Side Quests (along with other spin-offs and how I feel about them in comparison to Side Quests.) Now, I have a lot of strong opinions about this newly developing series. For one, I really, really don’t like the animation/art style. It feels too flat in a way, and Finn’s design feels even more simplified than the classic two dots and a mouth that he had before. I do recognize that I have some bias, as the original is my favorite show of all time and I feel quite protective of it, and I recognize that I am in the minority of opinions when it comes to Side Quests, but my opinion has not changed after acknowledging that.

Everyone knows that the creators of Adventure Time tended to experiment with different art styles, especially in the later seasons, and I applaud the courage it takes to change the art style of such an iconic and loved show. However, as a die-hard fan, I just really cannot get behind this new approach. There’s just something off about how Finn and Jake look. They’re so much more simplified and flat, it looks like a low-sensory show for babies. (This isn’t a dig at the animation team in any way.) It just feels lack luster and like it’s missing the heart it once had. The passion that made the show so lovable feels lost when just looking at the cover.

I will say, the creators have very good reasons for why they went with a no-line art style. Pendleton says that illustrating with no lines took very long but it’s worth it for the show to have a childlike, story book feel. He says the style is meant to convey the innocence of Finn and Jakes early years while keeping their chaos. I’m sure the original humor shines through in the show, and I love the thought put behind the art style, I just can’t get behind the art style itself.

Adventure Time: Side Quests Opening Is Something Pretty Special

(Example of the new art style)

Adventure Time HD Wallpaper Featuring Finn & Jake’s Epic Journey

(The original, goated art style that permeates my dreams)

There are some good aspects to it if I’m being honest. At first, I was scared that they’d be retconning the previous lore or using it as a continuation like they did with Fionna and Cake, but thankfully that’s not the case. This new show apparently centers around the early life of Finn and Jake. I do love the idea of this and plan on watching the show myself. I haven’t seen any yet so I can’t criticize it or praise it beyond shallow, trivial things. But I’m really not the biggest fan of yet another spin-off.

How to watch Adventure Time: Fionna and Cake Season 2 outside the US ...

(My love and my light, Fionna and Cake)

The original show has enough spin-offs as it is. Some are in fact better than others, like Fionna and Cake which is known for its extension of lore and heavier themes. Distant Lands isn’t too bad either. I enjoy seeing BMO do their little thing, but it’s still not my favorite. There’s also another spin-off being created about Marceline and Bubblegum titled Adventure Time: Bubblegum and Marceline. Which isn’t the most creative to say the least, yet I’m still pretty excited for it. I feel like we as an audience deserve more Bubblegum and Marceline screen time. I am very excited for a show centering one of my favorite queer ships (which could be its own rant to be honest.) I myself I haven’t been able to find examples of the art style. I can only hope that it’s true to the original and not simplified with weird colors and shading like Side Quests seems to be.

‘Adventure Time: Bubblegum and Marceline’

(Only picture I can find that is for sure from the show.)

I don’t have much to say about this show since information is sparce, but I am a sucker for sapphics (who are very misrepresented in media as a whole.) I just hope they stick to the dynamic the original characters have while also expanding on that dynamic and properly representing a good sapphic relationship.

And with that slightly unintelligible rant, I believe my first blog is done.

As the great Wendigoon says, “and as always, thank you for watching. BYE-”

American Songwriter.

12 Notes Tour

Alec Benjamin has been one of my favorite music artists out there, once upon a time he was niche but I’m very happy he’s well known. He’s worked hard for it.

Alec is the kind of guy I look at and get “Lover Boy” from. He’s very passionate in his writing about multiple feelings and how he may feel towards others and scenarios. Alec has various forms of singing as well. Most songs are slow, letting you hold on to every word, others are more rapid as he brings you into this scene of intense pressure or stimulation with his skills to rap.

Alec’s most common genre, I would say, would be a more romantic/heartbreak genre. In some of his album’s descriptions, it’ll talk about his experiences and mor importantly, you’ll hear it from himself in his songs.

Now, unfortunately, if you’re like me and listen more predominantly on Apple Music, you will be limited to four albums.

Narrated for You – 2018

These Two Windows- 2020

(Un)commentary- 2022

12 Notes- 2024

And a few Singles, He’s released “The Knife in My Back “on Apple Music in 2025 after having been on YouTube for such a long time. He’s reprised the song from its original and it’s so hard to choose which ones better, but personally, I’m really liking the 2025 reprise more but I’m juggling right now. And his newest song, EMOTIONS with WENDY, a Korean artist.

You can find more of his songs all on YouTube, which is where I first discovered him through one of those lyric videos. The kind that just end up on your YouTube playlists rather than the original video for some odd reason. His music videos are also really cool; some are of him others are more engaging.

I personally feel like Alec has a little bit of something for everyone. He’s also great to listen to when studying or writing (Unless you’re like me when your favorite song comes on and you start dramatically singing it out).

I do highly suggest giving him a listen if you haven’t heard of him before and if you have and it’s been forever given him another listen.

If storytelling could be told in song form
With twists and turns and everything between
Each pluck of the string. 
A devotee
quiet
fast
slow
serene. 
                             -Lily Ross,
                                   A small poem on Alec Benjamin

sen·ti·men·tal·ism

sen·ti·men·tal·ism

[sɛntɪˈmɛntəlɪz(ə)m]
noun

sentimentalism (noun)

excessively sentimental behaviour, writing, or speech:

"the author blends realism with surrealism, journalism with sentimentalism"

Sentimentalism, as a concept, was introduced to me with its theatrical meaning. Bascially, sentimentalism is the pattern of plays having an “evil” character who is reformed and redeemed, and becomes good. Every bad act they have ever committed is simply negated because the protagonist hit them with a beam of friendship, love, and understanding. They may have a slip or two back into evil, but usually those are for noble reasons, separating them from being “evil”, that the protagonists either don’t know or misunderstand, hence the miscommunication trope.

Everyone has already done their “last blog” blogs, or most of everyone, and I’m going to talk about this little thing called sentimentalism. It’s just a fancy way for me to talk about how I’ve gotten so sentimental over the last few weeks, since someone told me we only have 3 go-home weekends left. It actually freaked me out sooo badly.

I have my own reasons for not wanting to go home for the summer, like a whole list that just gets longer and longer the closer and closer the summer gets and…. One of the main reasons is I know that I wont see a lot of people again. People are leaving, not getting invited back, or coming back and they may be entirely different people. I myself have changed so so many times, over and over again, throughout this school year that if I were to meet myself in may 2025 he wouldn’t recognize me.

My entire life has flipped around a hundred times since coming here. I’m healthier, I have a better understanding of my style, im happier. I have more friends, ACTUAL, REAL friends that I made on my own. I have a whole new perception of myself and it’s honestly amazing. I have a group, and I’ve reconnected with old friends too. This year has been so eventful and I’m glad for every second of it.

My art has progressed greatly, too. At first I wasn’t noticing a change. I was trying something new, writing poetry seriously, for the first time and I hadn’t exactly found my voice in it yet. Now I’m comfortable enough to write things I couldn’t have imagined EYE (i) wrote. I, like I said in my last blog, hadn’t been writing, and writing at all was hard for me because of what all it means to me. I felt like it wasn’t enough.

Last night, though, I participated as a reader in Steph and Richie’s senior literary showcase. I always knew that writing and literature had a huge impact on the world around me, and I also knew that it wasn’t accurate to only assume that big, famous pieces like Moby Dick or whatever get the chance to impact culture. I genuinely think differently after that showcase, and I think that’s what literature is supposed to do. To make you think differently.

I think, without realizing, being a literary has made me think differently, too. Like I said, I’ve had my whole brain flipped around and blended and had transplants maybe a hundred times this semester, and I think it may be a part of maturing. I said me from may last year wouldn’t recognize me now, but I don’t recognize who I was in august, either, or October, or even December. Freak, February danny is an entirely different BEING from me now. And yet, I’m still me. Despite everything, it’s still me. IYKYK. I don’t know. I guess I’m just getting pretty sentimental, and I’d rather let everything go that has made me upset over the last few months. It’s not real anymore. None of it is real and everything is impossibly real at the same time. I mean, sure. I can be frustrated. I can be put off. But, at the end of the day, I have to move on to no choice of my own. Life’s gotta keep moving, and there are bigger things to worry about and worse things to happen. Everything is gonna get better, though. Everything’s gonna turn out all right, even if its only for a few years, months, weeks, days, hours, or minutes. If it so pleases you, everything only has to be all right for a few seconds, and if you notice that and cherish it, then it was real. It doesn’t matter how long it lasts. It’s that its there.

Idk. Danny’s getting emotional and I have no idea what he’s saying. Hate that guy. I want everyone, EVERYONE, in literary to know I love them so much and that they’re the best ever. Kiss kiss. Heart heart. Kind of regretting not ending this off with a Greek mythology blog, danny hates his feelings. BYE. I LOVE YOU. <3

Talking about writing instead of doing it

My struggles in writing that aren’t real problems but I want to talk about them anyways.

For reasons unknown, I barely wrote for an entire year, almost two entire years. My pieces I used to apply to MSA were the first things I had written in that whole time, all pieced together over the span of two-ish months. I actually have in a notebook, somewhere floating around my dorm right now, that had the single thing I wrote worth anything in that entire time.

Writing is pretty sentimental to me, and especially that piece and the subject its on—but I wont share what it is, due to how personal it is. It’s sort of the type of thing that I did love, then, and held very dear to me because it is literally the ONLY thing I could write for that entire portion of my life, even if I don’t care much for it now, or agree with it, or even resonate with it. I realized im a lot more personal than I previously thought, and I do overshare and infodump but its never really about the most deep, personal stuff to me and blah blah blah. I don’t like talking about stuff currently going on in my life, just stuff I did or that did happen in a somewhat comedic lense that cant currently effect me, and I really try to keep my personal thoughts and feelings out of things.

Really bad at explaining that, so I’m just going to jump into my point: I don’t write about my personal life.

Of all of my favorite, most memorable pieces, they were about something or someone else. My Polar Bear Haibun, Rose Oil, Metaphorical, 11:11, Tributaries, Constellations. They’re all great, and I love all of those stories and poems and whatever else so much, but they don’t really like reflect any of my inner beliefs. I think about so much, all the time, and none of it ever makes it into my work. Why is that?

A part of me is embarrassed. Like I’m scared of being wrong, like whatever I say could be taken the wrong way if I don’t over explain, but over explaining takes thought and impact away from other people. I think that’s why I love realism so much. You don’t ever look at someone scratching their nose and think they must think they have something on their face and they’re hiding it. You don’t think about it at all. You don’t think, are they embarrassed? Do they think they have food around their mouth and they’re hiding it?

You don’t ever think if someone’s worried that they’re accidentally flirting by twirling their hair, or if they look overly anxious by bouncing their leg, but these are always things people think about in themselves. You recognize it. It’s a way to hide. Or, maybe, forgetting to brush your teeth because you’re in a rush so you never stand to close to someone, or you’re worried if you missed a spot when brushing your hair and if you look a little crazy. If you’re like me, maybe your septum is crooked. Fix it. Oh, maybe your classes are lopsided. Are they too high? You get to say things, do things, that people never ever want or think of talking about. I think that’s because it’s so normal to you, but do you ever think about other people doing it? If you are, you’re incredibly vain, and probably judgmental. I know I’m judgmental.

But, in relation to that, I get too embarrassed to write about my personal life. I know that, realistically, there are probably entire communities full of people who think exactly how I do, or look at the world the same, or think about the same hyper-realistic things in art like I do, but who ever tells someone im terrified I have something in my teeth so I’ve been trying to look at my reflection in this one-sided glass window but the shade it too brown and I cant see and now im trying not to cry because that’s somehow worse.

It’s easier to keep my thoughts to myself than it is to share them, but at the same time I know that I’m not putting my best work out, because I’m not being genuine. But, I also feel like if I were to get extremely personal in my work, especially if that work was for literary, I would have to explain everything behind it and how it makes me feel and I DON’T do how things make me feel. I’d feel like I was venting in explaining why I wrote something, even if the memory is really happy or whatever. I also feel like if my short stories were any more personal then I’d end up, like, going 1000 and 2000 words over the limit instead of my usual 300-400 (sorry Dr Alexis). Or something.

This is danny’s (poor) attempt at discussing his issues with writing, and yes, before anyone says it or thinks it, I know that writing doesn’t HAVE to be personal. I just would like mine to be more so, I guess, even if I don’t exactly know how to do that. Dats all. I feel like I haven’t even said anything omg.