Category: Senior Literary

hello, blog. i forget u exist sometimes. i have a literary analysis of a song i like that’s been in the works since november but my focus isn’t good enough to finish that right now…. so i’m basically just going to infodump everything about my life within the past month on you. hope u enjoy that. 

sudden emo regression: i’m 13 again

i would be lying if i said i wasn’t exactly sure how it happened. since you guys never knew me in middle school, let me describe my past self to you. EMO. i was SO EMO. that probably gives you context to why i am the way i am now– im literally an evolved 2015 emo. i used to be obsessed with the “emo trinity” (my chemical romance, fall out boy, panic! at the disco). my chem was always my favorite, but i was also a pretty big panic! fan (i even saw them live in 2019 before all hell broke loose and brendon spiraled into the worst person possible). i never was too big of a fall out boy fan. i had a couple shirts and a poster (and actually so much more than that. idk why, i always liked them the least of the three) but i never really listened to them as much as my chem or panic!. well, it’s been forever since i listened to the emo music i loved as a kid. that was until i saw that the previous my digital escape member johnnie guilbert was trending on tiktok. when i was in middle school, my digital escape & our world away was two of my favorite channels to watch, along with dan & phil and crankthatfrank (so basically all emo youtubers). i thought “oh, okay. that’s cool. i haven’t seen johnnie in a while, i wonder what he’s up to now” with no knowledge that going back and watching his videos would send be straight back to my emo phase. he wasn’t the only factor in this, as i also started slowing inching towards my ryan ross phase around this time too. those two things combined and what i believe to be me attempting to relive my middle school memories before i graduate sent me straight towards an obsession with all the bands i used to love… except, some things have changed. i’ve been listening to WAY more fall out boy than i used to, and all the panic! i listen to is now pre-split or anything written by ryan ross. my chem is the only band out of the three that i haven’t gotten obsessed with again, which is insane considering it was always my fave out of the three. i’ve also gotten OBSESSED with kellin quinn & sleeping with sirens… same thing with pierce the veil. i listened to a couple of their songs when i was younger, but i’ve gone all in now. i’m absolutely in love with all of their songs combined. also, not really emo, but i’m sort of having a Tool phase too. i’ve been absolutely drowning in music and old favorite frontmen for the past month. 

final college decisions & letting go of my ego

i’ve made my final decisions & it took tons of self-reflection and deciding what was best for me. i felt like i’ve been seen as the really smart kid my entire life, and if i didn’t go to some impressive college then everyone would be disappointed in me. well, i don’t care anymore. i’m not going into debt for the first two years of my college life when i can easily go completely for free & live back at home (i’m tired of sharing things with people). i’ve decided i’m going to go to holmes community college in ridgeland and commute from my home every day. i’m also going to get a job and work at the same time so i can have some money saved up for when i transfer, because that is most likely when i’ll be moving out of home. i’m working on getting my license right now and looking at possible jobs. coming to this college conclusion has completely taken away my anxieties about college and has made me excited to go. i’m so easy to please that the idea of just getting to listen to music on the way to class in my own car makes me happy. 

so many concerts- so little money

guys, going into the new year i remembering telling myself i would go to more concerts this year…. i didn’t expect every artist i love to go on tour all at once. i mean, green day & smashing pumpkins, pixies & modest mouse, BOB DYLAN, and Tool??? i do NOT have the money in my bank account for this. it all started off when i saw green day & smashing pumpkins going on tour together & asked my best friend if he wanted to go with me to see them. we made plans and decided on it and i worked on getting the money for tickets and finding an airbnb… then the pixies and modest mouse announced THEIR tour… and then BOB DYLAN…… and now as we are both going through a Tool phase, we find out Tool is playing in biloxi THIS WEEKEND. how am i supposed to live like this guys. i want to see every concert ever.

ready to graduate & get out of here

i’m sure you all can agree with me here. i am so ready to graduate and GET OUTTA HERE. i miss all my friends from last year SO MUCH and i cannot wait to be able to get to hang out with them over the summer (if my job lets me). i am excited for college and feeling like an adult and just…. everything man. i’m so excited for my own income and getting to spend my own money on what i want (every pierce the veil shirt that has ever existed). i’m excited for concerts and making memories with friends and hopefully meeting new people that will stay in my life!!! i cannot wait for the friendships and relationships that i’ll find myself in within these next couple years. i’m not ready for life after college just yet, but as of right now, i’m starting to warm up to the idea of change.

so yeah! just a yapping blog today. i’ve been wanting to talk a lot recently so i guess this was my chance to get it all out. love u all, read u next time.

Heyyy everyone. I could not let this topic go untouched. I’m kind of late doing this but I figured why not do it anyway. I wanted to give my honest insight on the new FNaF movie. It became very controversial among the fanbase because half of them hate it and half love it. So, I’m adding my own two cents. 

Casting

This is the one thing I feel they did great on. I absolutely loved Matthew Lillard being casted as Afton, and Josh Hutcherson as Mike. Elizabeth Lail was also a nice pick for Vanessa. I also enjoyed how they included fan favorite YouTubers in the film as backing characters. People loved seeing MatPat and CoreyxKenshin in the movie. 

Characters

There was only one character in the film that was somewhat accurate to the lore and played well, Afton. I enjoyed Afton and his part in the film and I thought it was decently accurate (50%) compared to the others who aren’t accurate at all. I did not enjoy Mike or Abby very much. Mike was 100% not accurate and Abby did not even exist. Vanessa is one of my favorite characters in the books and games but in this movie they changed her so much it did not even feel like Vanessa anymore. I thought the animatronics were alright. The movie decided to take a different perspective on the animatronics that I would still consider decently accurate. They head first dived into the fact that the animatronics were haunted by children, which is true, and the movie decided to really embrace that aspect of the lore. Mike, Abby, and Vanessa end up drawing and building forts with the animatronics as well as making friends with them in general. Embracing the robots “inner child.” It shows how much the children were manipulated and I cannot say I enjoyed this but I won’t bash them for taking that route as it was a PG-13 movie.

Plot

The plot line for this movie was my least favorite portion. It was very inaccurate to the lore but that is my last concern. I understand that I am watching this movie from a different perspective. I know the lore and I have been in this fandom for a few years. Naturally, I did not enjoy the movies plot. I would have loved to see an R rated film, accurate plot, gore, and the whole nine yards. Instead we got a kid friendly spin off. If you were someone seeing this movie unaware of any of the lore, I could understand why you enjoyed the movie. Typically, those people were the ones enjoying this film while the lovers of lore were on the outside side eyeing it. I just would have loved to see something a lot more similar to the games. The movie shares almost nothing in common with the games besides the animatronics, they looked wonderful. I also understand that the lore is NOT set in stone. Almost all lore is what the fan base put together after studying the games and books. Some has been confirmed but not all, so who knows if the lore is what Scott Cawthon actually wanted it to be. To me, the best part of this movie was the end credits. Thank you.

The Lizard Man of Scape Ore Swamp is one of the lesser-known cryptids in American folklore, yet it has captured the imagination of cryptozoology enthusiasts and curious locals in South Carolina. This creature is said to inhabit the swamps and woods around Lee County, primarily in and around Scape Ore Swamp. This area is located near Bishopville. The legend of the lizard man dates back to the late 1980’s. The Lizard Man is often described as a reptilian humanoid. He is said to be around seven feet tall. He has scaly, green skin, three toes on his feet, and three fingers. People claim it has glowing red or orange eyes and sharp teeth as well. Some people mention it having a tail. The legend of the Lizard Man has become an integral part of local folklore in Bishopville and the surrounding area. It has inspired books, documentaries, and even a local festival called “Lizard Man Festival.” This event attracts enthusiasts and curious visitors looking to learn more about this cryptid.

The first notable sighting of the Lizard Man occurred in the summer of 1988. A local teenager named Christopher Davis claimed to have been attacked by a creature matching the description of the lizard man while changing a flat tire near Scape Ore Swamp. Davis reported that the creature damaged his car and left scratch marks on the vehicle. His account, accompanied by photographs of the damaged car, gained widespread attention. Following Christopher Davis’s report, numerous other witnesses came forward with their own stories of encounters with this creature. Some claimed to have seen the lizard man in or near the swamp, while others reported damage to their vehicles or property, similar to Christopher’s experience. Skeptics have given various explanations to everyone’s encounters saying witnesses may have seen misidentified animals or were influenced by the media attention generated by Christopher Davis’s encounter. However, believers in the Lizard Man’s existence point to the consistency of eyewitness accounts and the relatively remote location of the swamp, making it less likely for hoaxes to persist.

The Dover Demon

               The Dover Demon in an American cryptid that came around in the 1970’s. It is associated with a series of sightings in the town Dover, Massachusetts in the course of 2 nights in April of 1977. The Dover Demon is described as small and humanoid. It stands around 3-4 feet tall, thin limbs, and hairless. It has peach-colored, pinkish-grey skin. It is described as having large, glowing, orange eyes, a melon-shaped head, and long fingers. The Dover demon remains a legacy in American folklore and cryptozoology. Although the sightings in Dover are isolated to a few nights in 1977 we can talk about that.

               The first reported sighting of the Dover Demon was on the night of April 21, 197. Three teenagers, Bill Barlett, Mike Mazzocca, and Andy Brodie, claimed to have an encounter with this creature while driving in separate vehicles. They gave a description matching the one above saying it was walking along a stone wall. The nights after these many other sightings were reported by different witnesses. There were no documented photos, but the sightings became a local interest. Some believe it as a teenage lie for attention, others say it was a moose or fawn. 

Hey guys, it is October, and I am super excited for Halloween nevertheless, but today’s blog is not about that. Today’s blog is about my experience applying for colleges so far. Okay so I have applied upward towards about 40 colleges. I have them in a binder in my room, but off the top of my head I have applied to  

Mississippi State University (MSU)      

Delta State University (DSU)           

Belhaven University                             

Arizona State University (ASU)         

University of New Orleans (UNO)     

University of Memphis (UofM)       

University of Notre Dame (UND)     

School of the Art Institute of Chicago (SAIC)

Xavier university       

University of Mississippi (Ole Miss)   

Clemson University             

Baylor University       

Kansas State University (KSU)     

Texas A & M Vet Med School            

Florida State University (FSU)   

Spelman College and many more.   

I love MSA (Mississippi School of the Arts), and I have enjoyed my time here even though I have about 7 months left, but I am ready for something new. I like knowing what to expect, but I hate stagnancy. I love the routine I have created for myself and the life I have here. I have met the best people and some of the not so best but nevertheless it has been amazing. Back to the college experience, going into the process I really did not know what to expect. I did not know what the process was like, where I wanted to go, or what I wanted from a college. I did not even know what I wanted to major in. I had some colleges in mind that I really liked, for example SAIC (School of the Art Institute of Chicago), Notre Dame, and UofM and I still like them, and I thought I would major in screenwriting, but my mind has changed since last year. I may minor in creative writing, but it will not be my main occupation. I will be majoring in Pre-Veterinary Medicine (specifically biology/ animal sciences). I could also major in chemistry but uhmm that’s an obvious no, because me and math do not mix. Also, going into the process I was not necessarily worried, because things always work themselves out, but when I first started it STRESSED ME OUT. I think the first college I applied to was either Delta State University or Belhaven University, and it was not hard, but it was most definitely not pretty. Belhaven had a lot of links and different ways to get to the application in the email they sent me, so that threw me off as well as trying to find the link to the Angie Thomas Scholarship and what they wanted in my writing portfolio, but on the other hand Delta State University, was so smooth and easy. After applying to Delta State, I began carrying my laptop everywhere I went and was applying to schools in all of my free time and even my busy time, but what I absolutely DREADED was FAFSA (Free Application for Federal Student Aid) oh my goodness. I know it has not even opened yet, but you still have to make an account as a senior before it opens on December first and I have never in my life, been interrogated so specifically. It takes a long amount of time to create an account, but I have been told by admissions groups at different schools that they have decreased the number of questions by half or more so when it opens on December first, I will not have to answer questions for hours. I don’t want to make it seem like I hated the process I absolutely enjoyed applying for colleges, and the virtual tours were really helpful, especially when it came to the dorms, bathrooms, and other living space amenities. I think my favorite online application had to be scholarships. I loved applying for scholarships and even when applying generally to a college most would take that and put it in as a scholarship application so less work for me. Mississippi State offered me about $6,000 but that is the scholarship they give all first-year students if you have the right ACT score, but I have not applied for anymore there, because I am not going there duh! However, Kansas State University offered me $67,496 over four academic years, but I also have not applied for any of their other school specific ones. I have also applied for the Gates Scholarship which pays full tuition and more, btu I have not heard much back yet. The biggest scholarship I have right now is the Coca-Cola Scholarship which started off with more than 100,000 applicants but now is down to 1,515 applicants and I am one of those semifinalists. If I make it through this phase, then it will be 250 applicants and I must go through an interview process to be one of the 150 applicants who are awarded. This scholarship awards 80,000 dollars to be used over 4 years, it also covers books, certain personal expenses, and will pay for my travel to and from college since I will be going out of state. This scholarship also grants me a week trip to Atlanta, Georgia for a ceremony, and other activities fully paid for. I have been accepted into every college I have applied to and heard back from and scholarships so far as well, and I could not be more grateful. All I could hope for is more scholarships, financial aid, and grant money to come my way soon, Thank you guys for reading. Until next time! 

I have no other idea of what to write about, so I’d like to use this month’s blog to kinda spill out what has been my inspiration lately as well as some workshop ideas for future pieces. Since we are now in our poetry unit, I have been using platforms like Pinterest to spark ideas and I normally look for photography that is very creative/unique and kind of tells its own story. I love using pictures as visual prompts for future poems and I thought I’d share some of them and maybe they spark something for you as well 🙂

Some of these I’ve already used for a piece, but these are some that I find really cool and would love to use them for prompts in the near future. I’ve used the lighthouse photo for an idea for a story that I’m not quite sure if I want to do for the national writing month. I was thinking something like a haunted lighthouse that a young woman has to look after since her family member passed away or something like that. I think it may be interesting especially if the lighthouse is isolated from the mainland like in the picture. I don’t know, it’s still a work-in-process kind of an idea. I’ve used the picture of the girl with the bottle for one of my poems in my collection(which y’all will see soon enough). When I first saw if, of course, the first thing I though of was bottling emotions so I ran with that idea. I feel like some of the other pictures could be used to write something spooky or eerie. Maybe y’all see something different in these photos. I especially love the photo of the girl and the headlights and the one where it looks like someone is trying to escape a mirror or painting.

Here are some others that I really love and I think each interpretation of these could go a bunch a different ways, so that’s why I added these.

Some other ideas that I had for the national writing month are more along the lines of fantasy and mystery. I started something a little while ago about a girl named Briar and her two best friends, Kat and Serena, sleeping over at Briar’s house and someone breaks in. What I have written down so far is simply the character detail and background of Briar and what her current situation is leading up to the first main event. I’m not sure where I want to take it and how I want to evolve(for lack of a better word) the situation. I’ll just have to cross that bridge when I get to it. The thing is that I don’t know which idea I like more: Briar’s story or the story with the lighthouse. What do y’all think(no, seriously, I’m looking for honest opinions and you can even tell me that they’re silly if they are)?

I know this is a particularly short blog, but I figured I wouldn’t bore y’all too much with so many details. Spooky day is almost here so I hope that each of you have a happy Halloween and I’d love to know what or who y’all are dressing up as. I hope y’all enjoyed this and I will see you guys next time. Much love<3