My Favorite (Actually Niche) Youtubers

I wasn’t sure what I wanted my last blog of the year to be, but I thought I’d leave you all with some recommendations for youtubers I love and watch all the time. There won’t be a specific order to this list, and these creators will range from a couple thousand subscribers to a million or so, but they are all under-appreciated and deserve more attention. They will also range drastically in what their content is about- some commentary and reaction channels, some movie/media reviewers, some who craft and sew, and even more. I highly recommend you check out these creators over the summer!

1. Kennie JD

I’ve been watching Kennie since quarantine- probably late 2019 into 2020 was when I really found her. She’s been on youtube for at least 12 years. For the first five years, she mainly posted about makeup and storytimes, but, in September of 2019, she found a new niche. She posted a video about the movie Tall Girl, joking about the plot and dramatics over a girl being tall- as if tall women are oppressed or something. Kennie herself is six foot and talks a lot about her own experiences in the video, which made it more immersive. She started a series called “Bad Movies and a Beat”, where she does her makeup while reacting to or giving her review of a bad movie. Sometimes she’ll switch it up with “Good Movies and a Glam”, where she does the same as before, but discusses a good movie instead. I tend to have similar opinions to her when it comes to movies and plot lines, so it’s nice to see someone else experiencing the same confusion I have when watching a certain movie. I also love learning about movies through her videos. She is extremely funny and I highly recommend going to check out her stuff. She talks about many types of movies; from rom coms to horror/thrillers to dramas to cheesy christmas movies. She also reviews reality TV shows sometimes. Her most recent videos have been her reacting to old 2000s reality TV and they are extremely funny. She’s also an extremely talented singer- check out her spotify!!

2. Micarah Tewers

I found Micarah about a year before quarantine, I believe. She is one of the most popular people on this list, with over 2 million followers, but I rarely see people talking about her. She’s been on youtube for at least 8 years now, consistently posting videos of her making costumes and clothing with fast paced and comedic tutorials that no one is necessarily intended to follow. Her videos almost always have a vlog-feel to them, even if they aren’t explicitly a vlog. She has pet parrots, chickens, and ducks who appear in many of her videos. There always seems to be a side-plot to each video where she has to rescue a wild animal or help her dad with something or prank her brother or visit her best friend. She’s extremely funny and there is never a dull moment in her videos. Even if you don’t like sewing or crafting, you will have fun with her channel.

3. Sarah Spaceman

I found Sarah almost two years ago. She really brought back my love for cosplay and cosplay conventions with her video series on how she made this extremely complex cosplay and then went to compete in it at a huge convention. She’s extremely talented and I’ve learned a lot about crafting and sewing through her videos. I also love her vlogs where she goes to conventions as the cons she attends are huge and expensive cons that I won’t be able to go to anytime soon, so I get to live vicariously through her videos. Once again, even if you don’t like sewing or cosplay, you will be entertained by her content. 

4. Izzyzzz

I believe I also found Izzy over quarantine, though I’m not sure. Their videos are primarily about nostalgic events, people, websites, and fandoms from the 2000s-2010s. Their deep dives on the video game The Path is where I discovered my love for that game and obscure media in general. They is extremely good at their research, and their videos are always very interesting both visually and auditorily. They always makes sure to give the full context for events and fandom discourse, which helps give an honest and neutral view of the topics being discussed. I highly recommend their videos about the brony history, their deep dive into Animal Crossing, and their deep dive into the Norm of the North twitter account. They’re also working on an animated series right now, so go check that out too!

5. Reilly Elaina

I found Reilly a few months back when I was trying to figure out why everyone on tik tok was mad at a certain creator. Reilly has only been posting for three months, but I predict her account will blow up in the next year or so. She has an extremely soft voice that is really satisfying to listen to (I know how weird that sounds, but I put her videos on in the background while I’m playing Stardew Valley and it’s really satisfying??). She mainly discusses internet discourse, typically things going down actively online. She does extreme deep dives and cites all her sources, which I applaud. She also gives really interesting perspectives to discourse topics that are more ignored/less talked about. For example, she has BPD and talks openly about it and how there are many creators with BPD on tik tok who are spreading misinformation about the disorder and further stigmatizing BPD. You should go give her a follow!

6. Trin Lovell

Another GOAT I found over quarantine. Trin does movie reactions/reviews, but she is extremely funny and out of pocket with her takes and she isn’t afraid to share said opinions. She will pause the movie to go on a fifteen minute rant about the scene and I will listen to the whole thing, nodding along to every word. My favorite series of hers is when she watches the best and worst rated episode of every season of Glee. She is also a self described scaredy-cat and had a series called “The Girl who’s Scared of Everything Watches [insert horror movie]”. Her reactions are very funny and I really enjoy her perspective of the movies she watches, even if I don’t always agree. She’s very entertaining and I highly recommend you go watch her reactions to horror movies if there’s ever a movie you’re too scared to watch alone.

7. Aust

I had to include a gamer here somewhere. I found Aust a few months ago, maybe closer to half a year. He posts longform videos of him playing (mostly) vanilla minecraft. I found him through his 100 Days in Harcore Minecraft series. He’s very funny and also extremely talented and it’s so cool to see everything he can accomplish in a minecraft world. He also has a really calm voice, which is a drastic contrast to a lot of minecraft youtubers. He really reminds me of gamerboy80, my favorite minecraft player of all time. They’re both really chill and really talented dudes who are way too good at minecraft. Go check him out if you like minecraft, or gaming in general.

8. Emma artly

I’m going to be real with you, I’ve only watched one of Emma’s videos all the way through, and it was her deep dive on the MLP youtube fan series “Bride of Discord”. She’s been posting for over two years and her channel has a mix of speedpaints, art tutorials, and commentaries on her interests. Her art style is adorable- kinda a mix of animal crossing, human MLP, and popular fan artists of the 2010s. I feel really nostalgic watching her videos. She’s also very funny, her commentary is really insightful, and I love hearing about topics and niche fandom events that I wouldn’t otherwise have known about.

9. Muldered

I found Muldered the other weekend while I was cleaning my room. I was looking for another deep dive video to throw on in the background while I cleaned, and I found his video about The Minerva Alliance; an analog horror series on youtube that was created by a number of popular analog horror creators. I love analog horror and supporting smaller artists on youtube, so I’m always down to watch their videos or listen to someone give a deep dive on the universe that their videos exist in. As I explored Muldered’s account, I found that his native language is Russian and he uses that to translate Russian analog horror series for his primarily English-speaking audience. I thought this was so cool and have been watching his videos a lot more since, as I love that I’m able to learn about a whole side of analog horror that I would never have been able to before because of the language barrier. He also has great comedic timing and I highly encourage giving him a watch if you also love analog horror.

10. Night Mind

Night Mind has grown in popularity over the years, especially within the analog horror/online horror fan communities. I’ve been watching him for maybe two years at this point and I love everything he puts out. I found him when I was searching for deep dives on the Marble Hornets series, which was a part of the internet that I grew up with but never really engaged with. His videos are extremely insightful and he gives productive critiques to the artists who create the analog horror he reviews. He also works with his community to find really small and under rated channels so he can bring attention to their art and share their creativity with his audience. His passion when talking about a piece he loves will never fail to make me smile. I can tell how much he cares about the art, writing, and filming, as well as all the work that goes into a good piece of analog horror. He’s extremely kind and fosters an amazing community with his followers, something that can be rare amongst youtubers these days. I highly encourage checking him out, his videos are amazing and definitely worth the watch. 

Thank you for reading! I hope you check out one or more of these creators, and I hope you have an amazing summer. This year was fantastic and I can’t wait to see you all, plus some juniors, next year! 

i’m trying to party like it’s 2016 this summer

When I was younger, I used to love summer. To be fair, I don’t really remember this, but my mom insists on it. She tells me about how I used to want to go to the beach to swim all the time and how I wanted to spend all summer outside. I’ve been trying to relearn that feeling over the past few years. I love swimming, but I don’t go swimming often because I struggle to find swimsuits I’m comfortable in. I hate the beach- sand is my enemy and the sun is even worse. I like sunbathing just fine, but I swear to god, the sun at the beach is a million times hotter than the normal sun. 

All that is to say, I’m trying to hype myself up for this summer. I have a lot planned; I’m gonna finally get my drivers license, hopefully lock down a job once I have legal access to a car, and hopefully spend the rest of the summer hanging out with friends and family. Now you’re probably asking, how does 2016 fit into any of this? To that question, I pose my own question; When did summer seem the most fun? I was eight in the summer of 2016, and all I wanted was to look and dress like the influencers going to Coachella or the instagram models with their cakey, colorful makeup. I was a child, though, so I never got to live that dream. I’m finally old enough, and comfortable enough in my identity, to live out my childhood dreams. So besides the important things, like my license and job, here are some 2016-themed things I have on my summer checklist: 

1. Makeup

A cut crease, a bold or nude lip, thick contour, even thicker brows, so much highlighter that you’re seen from space. I miss it all. I’m always going to prefer cakey, over-the-top makeup to the “natural” or “no-makeup-makeup” looks. No hate for what you prefer, I’m just a sucker for the dramatics. I’m trying to get my hands on some of the popular makeup products from 2016, like Kylie’s nude lip sets and dip brow gel. 

2. Outfits

Here’s where the major difference of 2016 style begins to show. Even as a kid, I knew the difference between a tumblr girl and an instagram influencer. I also knew I wanted to be both of them. While I definitely feel more comfortable in the alternative, indie style that comes from tumblr, I want to venture out of my comfort zone and try to recreate some of the iconic outfits from 2016 Coachella. 

3. Music

I have at least two playlists dedicated to 2010s music. Most of my love for these albums comes from nostalgia, but I do genuinely love some of these songs. Colors by Halsey is one of my favorite songs, there’s a bunch of old P!ATD that I really love, and the entire Blurryface album by T∅P has ruled my life since I first heard Ride. Anyways, I’m gonna be playing these in my headphones all summer long. 

4. Recreating Iconic Photos

There are thousands more that I couldn’t fit here, but here are some of my top few. When I tell you these photos had a chokehold on me. Some of them will be easier to recreate than others, but regardless, you can expect to see them on my instagram at some point this summer. 

Now, I’ve got a bit more planned, but this is all that’s super important. I do plan on rewatching a bunch of tv shows and movies from the 2010s/late 2000s because I love nostalgia chasing. I also want to use this summer as an opportunity to watch some of the movies that I was too young to watch/never got around to when they came out in the 2010s. I also really want to read more, so I plan to spend a lot of this summer sunbathing with a good book. That’s pretty much it. I’m super excited for the summer and I can’t wait to party like there’s no tommorow. 

Part 3 of My “Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark” Review/Ramble

So let’s hop right back in. Chuck has just disappeared into thin air, and the whole time he was being chased down by this water-logged, black haired, glob of a creature, Ramon and Stella have been reading. They watched Chuck’s story actively being written, knowing that meant he was being killed (?), and yet they didn’t show up until right after he disappeared.

Now it’s just Ramon and Stella and everything looks pretty bleak. However, while Chuck was going through it, Ramon and Stella were doing research about Sarah Bellows (aka, reading through her medical records) and they found out about the abuse she had faced from her entire family. Sarah had a relative who worked at the mental hospital where she was institutionalized and would use his position of power to manipulate and gaslight her. It’s believed she killed him, and many other of her family members, though Stella believes that means that Sarah wrote stories about them and then the bad things happened (rather than Sarah commiting the violent acts herself). 

Ramon and Stella end up getting arrested for breaking into the hospital. Stella calls her dad from jail, and it’s actually a really emotional and sweet scene. She basically tells him that she’s afraid she’s going to die or go missing and that if she does, she wants him to know that she loves him. Then the evil police officer shows up to harass Ramon for skipping the draft and tell Stella she’s free to leave. Stella tries to explain that everything going on is because of Sarah Bellows and her magic book, but the evil cop couldn’t care less. He locks Ramon and Stella in separate cells for the night. Ramon and Stella have a sweet moment, but I don’t care to harp on that arc too much. 

Anyways, Stella left Sarah Bellows’ book on the cop’s desk and he (the cop) notices that a new story starts being written in it. He asks if Ramon and Stella are somehow writing it, but of course they aren’t. When they hear a new story is being written, they freak out and insist they’re gonna die, but the cop is too dumb to care. This story is about Ramon, and he recognizes that pretty quickly because he recognizes the monster that’s coming after them. This is the Jangly man, easily one of the most terrifying monsters in this whole movie in my opinion. The cop thinks he can just shoot it, but obviously it’s not that easy. Ramon and Stella manage to get free from the cells while the evil cop battles the Jangly man. This next part is blurry but I believe Ramon hijacks a police car to try and drive away from the Jangly man, while Stella takes the book and runs back to the Bellows house. 

Once at the Bellows house, it’s almost like Stella enters a time loop (similar to what happened to Chuck in the closet scene) because everything is restored to its original condition from all those years ago. There are ghosts/visions (??) of the Bellows family running around the house- The mother is yelling about how Sarah got out and the boys need to go find her and bring her back. Except, they find Stella and believe she is Sarah, so they take her and lock her down in the basement. This is where Stella and Sarah finally meet, and Stella confronts her about how she’s becoming the monster that everyone accuses her of being. Then Stella gets Sarah’s magic pen that writes with blood (her own blood) and Stella rewrites Sarah’s history so that she can be remembered in a more honest and forgiving way, rather than blamed to be a monster as most people choose to view her as. Then the house rumbles and shifts and Stella’s back in the present timeline. She finds Ramon and they rejoice, even though their friends are dead/missing.

The movie ends with the reveal that Stella has been writing all of this as a memoir of sorts- another one of her stories, though it is a true one. She mentions that Auggie and Chuck are still missing, but implies a sequel by hinting that she plans on getting them back. The very end of the movie, which is my favorite scene by far, reveals that Stella and her dad broke Ruth out of the mental hospital and they all drive off into the sunset. Also Ramon goes to Vietnam, but that felt like an afterthought. Anyways, roll credits. 

OKAY. So let’s get into how I think the sequel should be handled. I think the ending of the movie itself sets up some pretty concrete ideas for a second movie. We have a new magical object; a pen that writes with blood and can write or rewrite history. We have the same main character, Stella, but she’s grown as a person and has a new side character, Ruth. We still have the social/political side plot of the war and everything else going on in the late 60s, early 70s, and with two female leads, we could have a lot of interesting conversations about feminism in the B-plot. 

The main conflict is pretty obvious; we gotta get Chuck and Auggie back. I imagine they’re gonna be pretty traumatized from their stories and this second movie would have a perfect opportunity to tackle themes of PTSD and trauma. Auggie’s story had a lot to do with food and then he ended up getting pulled away from under his bed, so I could imagine him developing disordered eating habits and possibly a fear of something being under his bed. Chuck clearly developed a fear of red, specifically red rooms, but I could also see him becoming afraid of being alone, considering his story only happened when he separated from Ramon and Stella. 

On top of that, I could imagine a conflict of the characters arguing about whether or not they should bring Tommy back. If they do, maybe he’s even more evil and he becomes the new villian. Maybe he will become their friend. Probably not, but who knows. What about all the other people written into Sarah’s stories? Should they unwrite them, and if they do, what does that mean for them and their town? What about the monsters in the book? Could they get free, now that Sarah is gone?

Now what about the magical item, what’s the give back? All magic has an equal and opposite reaction, or whatever the laws of magic are. You can’t use magic without paying a price. Well, considering this pen writes with her literal blood, I imagine Stella having many fainting spells and becoming ill from blood loss/low blood pressure. She could be risking her life to save her friends. That is another huge piece of tension that could affect all of the characters. I also wonder if there could be another element of Stella becoming power hungry to some extent. In the first movie, she, Chuck, and Auggie are portrayed as the outcast weird kids of their school, so I wouldn’t be surprised if Stella became somewhat obsessed with having the ability to control history with a pen and paper. I also wonder if there is some element of darkness to the pen, which is what made Sarah Bellows evil in the first place. I’m not sure, but this would be an interesting plot point and way to build more tension between the main characters.

As for Ramon, I don’t really care what happens to him. I don’t know why they wrote him off to the war. I imagine that we’ll get scenes of Stella writing letters to him. Maybe we’ll get a subplot about him not writing back and everyone being worried he died. Maybe they’ll actually kill him off. I don’t care too much about him. 

As for NEW characters, I hope we get some more actors of color in this film. I’d love to have more scenes with Lou Lou and her daughter- Maybe they have more family members that are closer in age to Stella and her friends. Maybe Lou Lou’s daughter and Stella’s dad have a fling- I don’t know, I’m just spitballing ideas here. On the topic of new couples in the second  movie though, I want Chuck and Auggie to finally confess their love for each other or I swear to god I’ll lose it. I don’t care that it’s the 60s, gay people are everywhere. I can imagine (aka I’ve already written the fanfiction) the two of them growing from their trauma, bonding further over their shared trauma, and healing/coping together (because they’re the only people who can truly understand what they both went through). 

For the big finish of the movie, it depends on the route taken, but I figure it’ll be a cacophony of Sarah Bellows’ undead family members coming back with a vengeance, Stella battling any ailments brought on by the blood-ink pen as well as any evil curses that might be trying to control her, and the big question will be how do we rewrite the undead Bellows’ stories so they don’t kill us, while also not rewriting Chuck, Auggie, Ruth, and Ramon’s stories? Or maybe it’ll tie back to The Night of the Living Dead (which they were watching at the drive-in theater in the first movie) and they’ll have to fight the undead off like zombies. I’m not sure about how I think this second movie should end, but that’s something we’d figure out more and more as the writing process goes along. And maybe one day I’ll have a full script for this second movie and I’ll force you guys to read that too. We shall see.

Anyways, thank you for reading this ramble. This movie is so dumb, but genuinely one of my favorite things ever. Even if it’s to hate watching the plot, I highly suggest checking it out. It’s scary, but it’s also beautiful, visually, and it has some amazing CGI, costuming, and special effects. 

My “Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark” Review, Part 2

I’ll pick up right where I left off, so if you haven’t read the first part of this deep dive, you’re gonna be a bit confused. Anyways, all the main characters are in the basement of the Bellows haunted house and Stella has founded the rumored book of Sarah Bellows’ stories. Allegedly, these stories were written in the blood of children, or some spooky BS like that. Stella doesn’t seem worried at all and immediately wants to read it, but Chuck is insistent that they get the hell out of there. Suddenly the candles in the basement go out, everyone freaks out, then they run to the door and try to leave. Turns out, evil bully Tommy has trapped them there. Ruth is there with him, begging him to let her brother and his friends out. She ends up getting shoved into the basement as well and Tommy leaves them all locked down there.

They end up getting out pretty easily, but I wanna take this time to talk more about Chuck and Auggie’s relationship. As previously stated, Chuck and Ruth are brother and sister and have a pretty average, bickering sibling relationship. Auggie has some degree of feelings for Ruth and gets flustered when he’s around her, and this really bothers Chuck. My first thought is he’s just defensive of his sister and he doesn’t like the idea of his best friend dating his sister. However, he hates when Auggie flirts with anyone. There was a moment earlier in the movie where it was clear Auggie either has or did at one point have a crush on Stella, something Chuck also didn’t approve of. Chuck doesn’t show interest in anyone, except Auggie. More on that later, but, at this point in the movie, it became clear to me that these guys have something going on. 

When they get out of the house, they get back to Ramon’s car and find it’s been vandalized by Tommy and his goons. They wrote a slur on his hood and slashed his tires. Ramon had been living out of his car, so this is a huge issue for him. Stella, for some reason, suggests he come home with her and sleep in her basement. Girl, that man is an adult and a stranger… Anyways, he agrees because he has feelings for her. When he gets to her house, this is when he starts going through her room and reading her journals and stuff. Genuinely, my rage for this man grows the more I think about the crazy stuff they just let him get away with. Anyways, he does end up sleeping in the basement and not in Stella’s room, thank GOD.

Alone in her room, Stella takes out Sarah Bellows book of stories that she stole from the Bellows’ house. Like an idiot, she took the cursed book from the haunted house and now everyone is gonna die. She starts flipping through the stories and then finds some blank pages. She’s about to close the book when red text starts appearing on the blank pages. When she touches it, the red “ink” smears. She watches the story appear on the page and starts reading it and then Tommy’s name appears in the story. The camera cuts to Tommy at his family farm, doing chores for his mom. Long story short, he gets lost in the cornfield and then gets attacked by a living scarecrow that turns him into a scarecrow. 

The next day at school, there are cops everywhere because Tommy is missing and he’s on the football team so, of course, everyone is worried. Stella is trying to show the book to Chuck and Auggie and convince them that Tommy is somehow missing because of the book. Chuck seems to believe her, given that he saw that old lady at the house and generally he seems more open to the idea of the supernatural. Auggie, on the other hand, is a skeptic. He thinks his friends are just stressed and somewhat crazy and that the book is just making things worse. This, of course, means he’s gonna die next. 

Stella ends up throwing Sarah Bellows’ book in the trash and trying to separate herself from it. She tries to convince Ramon that the book took Tommy, and they even go to see the scarecrow on Tommy’s family farm. The scarecrow is wearing Tommy’s letterman jacket. Ramon isn’t convinced, but is more worried about a run in with the cops and insists they leave. They get back to Stella’s house and Ramon is right back to snooping through her stuff. He ends up finding Sarah Bellows’ book, which has magically reappeared in Stella’s room, and he starts reading it. Stella is terrified and wants to get rid of it. They fight over it, but then a new story starts being written and it’s about Auggie. Stella tries to contact Auggie on their walkie talkies, and she gets a hold of him but he’s still dismissive and doesn’t believe her. Eventually his story starts coming true and he freaks out. Stella and Ramon try to get to Auggie’s house and save him, but they’re too late. Auggie’s story is the story about the corpse’s toe that ends up in someone’s stew, and then the corpse comes back for their toe. Auggie ends up hiding under his bed but then gets dragged away by the corpse. It’s not clear where he goes, given he gets dragged through his wall and out of time and space. 

This is where another big question presents itself to me. Are people dying? Are they being transported to the book universe? Is that like limbo? Where are they going and can they come back? I have answered those questions on my own, but obviously none of those answers are canon. 

Anyways, Auggie is gone, and Stella has to break the news to Chuck and Ruth. Chuck loses his absolute mind over this. Like Achilles after the death of Patroclus, Chuck is angry, confused, and crying about how they have to get Auggie back. Chuck suggests they go to the police, but Ramon immediately shuts that idea down because he doesn’t want to talk to the cops. While I don’t think the cops could help them in this situation, I’m still pissed at how dismissive Ramon is. Like no one said you had to go?? We’ll go talk to the cops and you stay here!!!! Jesus… Anyways, Ruth still doesn’t believe that anything is going wrong- She thinks it’s some Halloween prank. She leaves in a huff because she is in the school play and has to go get ready. So, naturally, she’ll be attacked next.

In the meantime, Chuck, Stella, and Ramon try to do more research. They try to burn the book- doesn’t work. They go to the library to learn more about the Bellows family and Sarah Bellows as a person. While at the library, a new story starts being written and it’s clearly about Ruth. This leads to one of the more popular scenes in the movie, and one I still close my eyes during, despite having seen this movie multiple times. So, Ruth has had this pimple on her cheek from the beginning of the movie and it’s only gotten worse. Now, mere minutes before she’s supposed to go on stage for her performance, her pimple is swelling and pulsing. She runs to the bathroom to try and cover it up with more powder, but it ends up exploding into millions of spiders. I’m recoiling in my skin just thinking about it. However, Ruth doesn’t die. Stella and the gang are able to get to her in time. Chuck comforts his sister and protects her from the spiders while Stella and Ramon kinda just stare on in shock and horror.

Ruth ends up being sent to a mental hospital, but at least she’s alive. She will be important later, so don’t forget her. Anyways, Stella and Chuck have a conversation after Ruth gets driven off; Chuck is crying because he just lost his best friend and his sister, and Stella is like “It’s all ok though because we’re a team and we’ll figure it out” or whatever. Then the cops confront them and are like “Why are you guys always around or friends with the people being taken?” and they’re like “I don’t know, that’s so weird… Maybe you guys should do your job better”. There was also a scene after Tommy’s death where the main evil cop tried to accuse Ramon of killing or kidnapping Tommy, so it’s clear that all the cops in this town have it out for them. 

After Ruth is taken to the mental hospital, Stella, Chuck, and Ramon decide to do more research into Sarah Bellows in hopes of figuring out how to break this curse/get rid of the book. They visit an older black woman named Lou Lou, who’s mother had worked for the Bellows as a maid or servant. Lou Lou’s mother was fired as it was believed she taught black magic to Sarah Bellows. Lou Lou blind and generally unstable, both with her physical and mental health. Regardless, she remembers Sarah Bellows and tells the three main characters that Sarah was a misunderstood young girl who was abused by her family. When she sees the book, she gets upset and tells them they shouldn’t have messed with it. She begins spiraling and rambling about Sarah’s suicide after she was forced into a mental hospital by her family. The main three are quickly rushed out by Lou Lou’s daughter. 

This new clue leads the main three to break into the mental hospital that Sarah had been placed in. The security on this place is so insanely lax- I understand it was the sixties, but the scene of them sneaking in behind some other doctors genuinely felt like a slap in the face. Some parts of this movie are not taken nearly as seriously as they warrant, and this moment is definitely one of those. 

Anyways, they’re trying to find the records room where all the patient information is stored. Illegal, but who cares. The records room is dubbed the “red room” for some wack reason, but this really bothers Chuck as the mysterious room from the past that he saw while hiding at the Bellows’ house was a red room. He refuses to go with them, and they split up. Stupid, but I love Chuck so I’m defending him on this one. He was protecting his peace. Stella and Ramon go to the red room, and Chuck goes up to the top floor. 

This is where we get, arguable, the most popular and recognizable scenes in the whole movie. Chuck gets lost on the top floor and starts hyperventilating, then the security alarms start blaring because they finally realized three kids just broke in and red lights start flashing. Chuck is freaking out, running through the halls and trying to find his way out, when suddenly he sees this extremely pale, extremely bloated creature with long black hair slowly walking toward him. No matter what door he opens or what hallway he turns on, she’s there. I could go on and on about Chuck’s character and the possible metaphors behind this scene, but I’ll save that for later. Anyways, he ends up being consumed by this creature? It’s hard to explain- There are multiple versions of this creature and two of them get him in the middle and kinda merge together, around him? And he disappears into thin air. Crazy way to die. 

We’re almost at the end! Gonna call this here but the final part of this review will wrap up the general storyline, as well as my thoughts on how a second movie should go. I may even write an entirely different blog about the implications of the character’s and their deaths/stories, because this is something very important to me and I think about it often. Even little details, like the character’s halloween costumes, their house designs, their names- I love over-analysing stuff guys. Thanks for letting me ramble. I’ll see you again next week!

My Love-Hate Relationship With “Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark” (The Movie) Part One

As many of you are familiar with, “Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark” was a series of scary short stories written by Alvin Schwartz and released in various forms over the years. You’ve probably heard a story from these books, whether you know it or not. These were the type of scary stories that got passed around through elementary schools, all slightly different retellings and all under the pretense that the stories were true. These stories have always held a special place in my heart, so imagine my surprise when, in 2021, I discovered a movie adaptation of the books already existed.

In 2019, Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark was released. André Øverdal, probably best known for his movie The Autopsy of Jane Doe, directed this film. Guillermo del Toro helped produce this movie, one of my personal favorite filmmakers of all time. His more popular works include Hellboy, Pan’s Labyrinth, The Shape of Water, as well as his work on The Hobbit films. Two extremely talented horror and sci-fi artists got together to produce an adaptation of the popular scary stories book trilogy and what they created was… definitely something. 

I want to start off this movie review by saying that I absolutely love this movie, probably more than most people did. I’ve been obsessed with it for the past four years. I’ve been obsessed with the actors and their other works as well. I’ve put a lot of mental space into thinking about this film. That is why I feel entitled to criticize the plot holes, concerning age gap relationships, misused politicism, and missed opportunity for an amazing sequel. I have an entire script in mind for a second movie so if anyone knows how to get in touch with Andre Overdal, that would be much appreciated.

The movie starts out with a short introduction of sorts from our main character, Stella. She makes a point to mention the importance of stories and how they can change your life. In the grand scheme of things, this introduction isn’t needed. It feels really cliche and also makes it feel that you’re about to watch a kids version of a horror movie, despite the PG-13 rating. I personally think they should’ve committed to an R rated horror movie, because then they wouldn’t have felt the need to have moments like this that cater to a younger audience. 

We are introduced to Stella as she bikes around her small town on a random day in the fall. The movie is set in the 1960s, and we are shown that through the characters’ wardrobe, appearance of cars and building, but most importantly, political propaganda. This leads to my second issue; politics are thrown around as a sort of C-plot in this movie and it comes off very weak. I would’ve loved if they dwelled more on the politics of the era at the time, but it almost feels like the political topics were included as an afterthought, and in a very lazy manner. For example, the next character we’re introduced to is Ramon. Ramon is a Mexican American who is fleeing the draft after his brother died in battle. This is a perfect opportunity to discuss the horrible reality that was the Vietnam war, and how many young people lost their lives during battle. However, this whole aspect of his character is pushed to the side as the supernatural aspects of the movie come into play.

Ramon’s character is extremely difficult for me to decide my feelings on. For one, he is obviously eighteen or older if he is being drafted by the military, yet he is supposed to be Stella’s love interest despite the fact that Stella is, at most, 16. I know that’s only a two year hypothetical age gap, but there’s a lot more about their relationship that bothers me. For one, he owns a car, is actively on the run and living on his own, and is extremely vague and secretive about his past. There’s a scene where Stella talks about how she dreams of leaving her small town and going to the big city to pursue writing. Ramon immediately shuts that down and says the city is bad. Later on in the movie he also snoops through her things and starts reading her journals??  On top of that, he is very controlling throughout the movie, despite having just met all of the characters. I want to root for Ramon, especially given that he’s the only person of color in this movie, but he is a weirdo the entire movie and it irks me to my core. 

Back on the timeline, we get to meet Stella’s two closest friends, Chuck and Auggie. These two are the epitome of the black cat and golden retriever duo. Chuck is a prankster, a jokester, a class clown if you will. Auggie is extremely serious, stone-faced, and pessimistic. At this point in the movie, we also get to see into their homes and we are shown how different all of the characters’ lives are. Chuck lives in a cramped, messier home with his mom and older sister, Ruth. His palette throughout the movie includes a range of colors, patterns and textures; his house, on the other hand, is very darkly lit and decorated. Auggie’s home is large and spacious, with brighter colors and symmetrical decoration. He lives with his mother and step father, who he has a strained relationship with. Stella lives in a small and cramped home with her father, though her home seems much more comfortable than Chuck’s. The rooms are lit with warm lights and warm colors, a contrast to the dark lighting and muted colors of Chuck’s house. I could go on and on about the fantastic set design and wardrobe of this movie as well as the implications of those things, but that is for another time.

Stella, Auggie, and Chuck are all getting ready for Halloween, despite being highschoolers. It’s not clear how old they are exactly, but they’re not seniors. I know that because Ruth, Chuck’s older sister, is a senior and her football boyfriend, Tommy, is also a senior. Tommy is one of this movie’s non-monster antagonists. He’s super racist towards Ramon, abusive to his girlfriend, and just a cartoonishly evil high school bully to everyone else. On top of that, he’s played by Austin Abrams (one of my favorite actors of my generation), who does an amazing job with whatever role he’s given. The acting in this movie ranges from really amazing to mediocre at best. For example, the racist cop is a very one dimensional character and it’s clear that the actor did the best he could with what he had. There are also a lot of tense scenes throughout the movie that certain actors and actresses had a difficult time with. There are plenty of reasons that might explain why the acting wasn’t top tier, but at the end of the day, it’s still extremely confusing (and pretty hilarious) to see a character remain pretty stone faced after their best friends just died. 

Anyways, back to the timeline, the three main characters get dressed up for halloween and go trick-or-treating. The whole reason they’re doing this is so they can prank the school bully, Tommy (Ruth’s boyfriend. Keep up, guys), by throwing a bag of flaming shit into his car. They end up getting chased by Tommy and his goons into a drive-in theater where they have to hide behind rows of cars. They end up seeing Ramon in his car and, for some reason, Stella open’s Ramon’s passenger side door and hops in. Does she know him? Nope. Do Chuck and Auggie follow right behind her? Yup. If I was Ramon, I would’ve lost my mind. To be fair, he is upset about Chuck and Auggie being there, but he was happy that Stella was there. He started blushing and got all nervous- like what?? I don’t care how hot someone is- if they break into my car, I’m losing my mind on them. 

Anyways, Ramon doesn’t have any survival instincts and that becomes more and more clear throughout the film. He ends up defending the three from Tommy, and they all decide to leave the drive-in theater and drive to a spooky old house in the middle of nowhere. This is when we’re introduced to the main supernatural elements of this movie. This old house was owned by the Bellows family, a wealthy family who helped put their town on the map. However, legend says that the Bellows had a secret daughter, named Sarah, that they hid away because she was so… ugly? It’s not exactly clear what about her was so off putting- I believe she had albinism, but that is never directly said in the movie. It is how she is portrayed, though. Anyways, legend says that Sarah Bellows would write these stories that she would read the kids in the town through a pipe or hole in the wall that led out of the house. It’s also kinda unclear how she was able to read to these kids if she was locked away… but she’s magic so who cares. Anyways, the Bellows family found out she was reading to kids and they got super mad and tried to punish her, but legend says she ended up massacring her family. Good for her, they all sucked. 

Like any teenagers in a horror movie, the main four decide to break into the old haunted house. Almost immediately, Chuck and Auggie run off together. Considering it was the sixties, they never made it canon that the two of them were in love, but they were. This is another detail of this movie I could go on and on about, but I’ll save that for another time. Anyways, Stella and Ramon explore the house together and end up finding the secret room where the Bellows family kept Sarah Bellows hostage. Auggie and Chuck are upstairs at this point, playing hide and seek. Chuck hides in a closet (like come on…) but he suddenly sees light coming from the other side. He opens in slowly and finds that the old room he once was in was now restored to its original form. There is a large bed in the middle of the room, and an old woman sits on it with her giant dog. They stare at him- he gets scared and slams the closet doors. Auggie eventually finds him and teases him about freaking out, but Chuck is ready to get the hell out of there- and I don’t blame him. However, he and Auggie end up joining Stella and Ramon in the secret basement room. 

Okay, considering I’m barely a fourth into the movie recap and I’m already nearing 2000 words, I’m gonna call it here. Next week will be part two- Hopefully I can be more productive in that part and less ramble-y. Anyways, thank you for joining me on this ride. If you are at all interested in this movie and have never seen it, PLEASE watch it. The only reason I like picking this movie apart so much is because of how much I love it. Also, if you’re interested in any of the mini tangents I went on in here and want me to expand on them, feel free to let me know! I could talk about this movie for literal years. 

another fanfic draft i need to finish

So I was going through my fanfic drafts on google docs and realized I had some gold in there that I never finished. I want to finish these pieces, but I’m not sure where to go with them, and I’m also lazy. I thought I’d share a couple of drafts here and see how you all feel about it. Today, I’ll only be sharing one because it’s quite long, and it centers around Steve and Eddie from Stranger Things. There aren’t any spoilers exactly, but I wouldn’t read it if you’re worried about spoilers. Anyways, please enjoy and leave your thoughts and opinions below. If you enjoy, I have many more from many other fandoms, so just let me know. 

Steve pulled into the gravel parking lot of the artillery store. The others in the van were quiet, hushed conversations dying out when they recognized where they finally were. Steve parked the large vehicle, let out a somber exhale, then turned his head to the group.

“We’re here.” He said as if they didn’t already know. None of their replies were verbal; only silent stares, as if waiting for Steve’s instructions.

“Let’s stick together while we’re in there, okay?” Nancy spoke up. “Just in case.”

Robin nodded, eyes glued to the floor while her foot bounced. Max went straight for the door, Lucas not far behind. Nancy and Erica followed them out. Robin finally looked up, locked on Steve’s motionless state.

“Aren’t you coming?” Robin couldn’t mask the fear bubbling in the back of her throat.

“Just give me a second.” Steve nodded toward the too-small bathroom placed haphazardly in the middle of the van. For safety and his own sanity, Eddie had crammed himself in there. 

“I’ll stay.” Dustin butted in.

“Nuh-uh.” Steve stood, shaking his head. “You two- go. I’ll be fine.” 

Dustin opened his mouth to argue but Robin stood. She looked at Dustin and nodded to the door before she took her leave. Dustin huffed once more, stubbornly rolled his eyes, then marched out to join everyone else. 

Steve watched through the window as Robin explained the situation to Nancy. Nancy glanced up at him through the shuttered windows of the van, brows furrowed as if asking “Are you sure?” Steve nodded and the group left for the store. He waited until they’d all disappeared behind the large industrial doors. When they were truly alone, Steve spoke up.

“You can come out now.”

Silence. Steve walked over to one of the cushioned benches. He shut the window blinds behind him and stared at the bathroom door. It took about sixty seconds before the door creaked open. Eddie poked his head out like a cat sneaking around a corner. His dark, wide irises met Steve’s, searching for confirmation of his safety. A deer in headlights asking the driver if he could cross the road. Steve scooted over, making room for Eddie on the bench. Eddie stood silent behind the door. 

“We don’t have to talk if you don’t want to.” Steve toyed with the fraying fabric on Eddie’s vest. He twisted the string around his finger and pulled.

“Don’t-” Eddie took one step from the door before he froze. Steve glanced up. “Don’t do that.” He whispered and marched over to the bench. 

Steve dropped the loose string. “Sorry.” He stared up at Eddie with a faint smile.

Eddie’s brows untightened and his sour expression began to waver. He sat down next to Steve. The somber silence resumed while Eddie drummed his fingers against his thighs, eyes sewn into the floor. Steve watched him, wondering if he should speak or just let the moment linger.

“You should be honored, y’know.” Eddie’s tone was serious, so Steve made a confused noise. “That I’m letting you wear that.” Eddie turned his head, clearly fighting back a smile. 

“Really?” Steve asked, amused. “Is it like when a jock lets his girlfriend wear his lettermen?” 

Eddie’s brows screwed up again and he looked away. “No, it’s different.”

“How so?” Steve leaned into the wall of the van, arms resting on the back cushion of the bench. 

Eddie shook his head, knocking more hair into his face. “You wouldn’t get it.”

Steve scoffed. “Try me.”

Another bout of silence. Eddie’s foot drummed into the floor of the van. Steve rolled his neck back and forth. The muffled chorus of coarse breeze and chirping bird seeped into the metallic box they sat in. Eddie rubbed his left hand over his face. Steve watched the rings clank together. He wondered if they were cold metal, or if the heat from Eddie’s nervous body had made them warm. He wondered what they would feel like against his own skin.

“It’s… special.” Eddie dropped his hand.

“Huh?” Steve blinked, expression blank. 

Eddie turned his head slightly and gestured noncommittally toward his vest. “All those pins-” He poked at one, the large W.A.S.P pin by the collar. “-they’re mementos; merchandise from concerts I’ve been to, shit I got at parties, gifts.” 

Steve awkwardly bowed his head to look at the pins. He moved the vest around, trying to read the band names from upside down. Most were logos he recognized. AC/DC, Metallica, Judas Priest, Megadeath. Others with illegible fonts or symbols that meant nothing to Steve. As he moved the vest, one pin peaked out from under the folded collar and was noticeably different from the rest.

“What’s this?” Steve nudged up the collar and pointed at the pink triangular pin. Eddie’s wandering eyes met Steve’s for a moment, then froze when they recognized what he was pointing at. 

“It’s, uh-” Eddie scratched hard at a spot behind his ear like a dog with fleas. “It’s a symbol- Nazi soldiers used it during the Holocaust to label people as queer. Terrible shit- but, uhm-” Eddie spun a strand of hair around his finger. Steve could see his hand trembling. “Y’know, over the years, it’s become a symbol for queer liberation. Silence equals death, y’know?”

“Oh,” Steve took a moment to think, rubbing the triangle pin beneath his thumb as he did. “That’s metal.”

Eddie’s wide doe eyes flashed toward him. The rest of his face was covered with a thick layer of hair that he held to his cheek. Steve met his gaze, silent and patient. Eddie swallowed dry, shuffled some hair behind his ear, and sat up.

“Yeah.” He agreed. “Very metal.” 

Steve thought a moment more. He toyed with the collar flap.

“Why is it under here, though?” He dropped the fabric and it covered the pin. “It’s like you’re hiding it.”

Eddie scoffed, then noticed the confused look on Steve’s face and his smirk fell. “We live in a town that goes batshit when kids play a fucking fantasy game, why do you think?”

“Oh.” Steve scrunched his nose. “Right. Sorry.”

A small smile snuck over Eddie’s face. “‘s fine.” He stared at the collar of his vest for a moment, only somewhat losing focus in the tanned skin just past the jean fabric. Before his brain could process the signal, Eddie found his hand reaching out for the collar. He lifted the flap, slipped a hand behind the fabric, and unclasped the pin. He tried his best to not acknowledge how close his hand was to Steve’s pec. 

Eddie slipped the triangle pin out of its hidden spot. “Sometimes I don’t hide it.” He tugged at the jean pocket, ignoring the feeling of Steve’s eyes memorizing his every move. “Like at concerts or bars…” Eddie pressed the pin’s needle back into the pocket’s fabric, then reached inside to reattach the backing. “…places where people don’t care who you wanna sleep with.” With the pin clasped once more, Eddie leaned back. He finally let himself meet Steve’s gaze.

Steve nodded, unsure of how or if he even should respond. Despite having nearly the same conversation about a year ago in a dingy mall bathroom with Robin, Steve still found himself unable to form a proper reply. In that moment, his speechlessness was different from that night in the mall. With Robin, conversations were easy. They were stupid and often nonsensical, but Steve understood her. He figured they shared the same neurons that most biological siblings did; they could speak a language that only the other could process. Eddie was on a whole different wavelength. Steve had maybe one or two conversations with him over the years. At a party, buying weed. At skull rock, smoking a blunt while Tommy paid for the weed. 

“Your friend,” Eddie looked past Tommy and met Steve’s blown pupils. “he doesn’t talk much, does he?”

“He doesn’t need to.” Tommy slapped a bill into Eddie’s palm and shoved the plastic bag into his own pocket. 

Eddie ignored him. “Harrignton , right?”

Steve nodded.

“D’you play any instruments?”

Steve shook his head.

Eddie stepped past Tommy, shoving his hands in the pockets of his leather jacket. “If you ever wanna learn,” He stopped a foot or two from Steve. “my band’s lookin’ for a drummer-“

“He’s not interested.” Tommy marched over, grabbed Steve by the bicep, and yanked him back toward his car. 

Even in those purely transactional conversations, Steve found himself tongue tied and pliant. He could blame his current silence on the topic of conversation, but Steve knew that wasn’t the issue. Eddie was a twenty-sided rubix cube to Steve. Despite his natural enthusiasm and grandiose emotions, Eddie was excruciatingly hard to read. Even if Steve thought he understood Eddie’s intended tone or reference, he still couldn’t rationalize the why. Steve had come to accept that some people, including Eddie, would do or say things for no apparent reason. That realization didn’t kill his curiosity whatsoever. 

“Y’know-” Steve didn’t realize he was speaking until he heard his voice through the familiar silence. Eddie acknowledged him, curious eyes wide. Steve wanted to bite his tongue, but he let himself continue. “I keep thinking about how different I would be if I met certain people sooner. Like you and Dustin, even Robin, Max.” Steve ran a hand through his hair. “I was such a dick because I only hung out with assholes. I had all of these ideas about myself that just- none of it was true. My freshmen year, I could’ve told you where I was going to college, what I’d major in, who I’d marry, the names of all our kids.” Eddie leaned forward, nearly slipping from the bench as he held onto every word. Steve sighed. “Now I don’t know anything. I feel like a new person.”

Steve stared at his hands which laid limp over his lap. He chewed at his inner cheek, wondering if he should regret everything he’d just admitted. 

“Sometimes…” Eddie spoke slowly, picking his words with seamstress precision. “…Sometimes that’s a good thing.”

“Yeah?” Steve lolled his head over to look at his friend. 

“Yeah- I mean it might not feel like it.” Eddie crossed his arms and hunched back into the bench. “I mean, shit, sometimes it’s fucking scary. I know what you mean by feeling like a new person. Up until I was like, ten- eleven maybe- I was just an extension of my dad. I did everything he told me, taught me. It wasn’t until I started butting heads with him that I realized how fuckin’ awful he was. When I left to live with my uncle- sure I was happy but I was also lost, y’know? Everything I knew was poof, gone. I had to relearn everything about myself.” 

“How?” Steve had sat up, now leaning closer to Eddie with piqued interest. 

“It’s different for everybody.” Eddie shrugged. “I met new people, explored new things. It took years, but I found a community that made me feel-like-” Eddie placed a firm palm on his own chest. “-complete. Like I found all my puzzle pieces.” 

For a moment, Steve didn’t react. He stared forward, eyes hooded and unreadable, focused on the hand that Eddie still had to his chest. Steve noticed the red, bruising knuckles and dried blood that stood out without bulky rings. A thick link chain hung loose around Eddie’s wrist. Steve watched as Eddie moved his hand and the chain slipped down under his sleeve. 

“Bet that took years.” Steve slumped back against the wall.

“Sure,” Eddie pulled his legs up, sitting cross-legged on the bench. His knee hovered just over Steve’s thigh. “But it’s fuckin’ worth it, man. I’d do it all again if I had too. Better than livin’ as someone you’re not.”

Steve’s eyes were stuck to Eddie’s bent knee. It was clear he was intentionally holding it there, tensing all his muscles rather than letting his leg touch Steve’s. Without much thought, Steve moved his leg closer to Eddie’s. He wedged his thigh under the other’s knee. 

“Doesn’t everyone do that, though?” Steve ignored how his movement made Eddie even more tense. 

“Huh?” Eddie looked up from their overlapping limbs. 

“Y’know,” Steve gestured lazily into the stale van air. “Sometimes you gotta ignore your passions to succeed in life.”

Eddie went silent for half a second, then broke out in a barking laugh. When Steve didn’t react the same, he composed himself.

“You’re serious?” Eddie let his legs relax. Steve nodded. “Jeez man- Who told you that?”

“I don’t know.” Steve shrugged limply. “I guess I told myself. Y’know, I wanted to do band before I started basketball-“

“What?” Eddie stifled another sharp laugh.

“Shut up.” Steve rolled his eyes but felt a grin tug at his cheek. “I wanted to be in the drumline. I thought that was badass when I was seven.”

“It is badass.” Eddie was beaming. “Why didn’t you?”

“My dad was a sports prodigy when he was in high school, he expected the same from me.” Steve brushed back his hair. “Signed me up for basketball, track, and swimming before I had a chance to argue.”

Eddie let out a dramatic gasp. “What a dick.” 

“I don’t know,” Steve groaned. “It’s not like I didn’t want to do sports-“

“He should’ve asked.” Eddie was slowly inching closer as he bounced in his seat. His left leg was now pressed firmly into Steve’s thigh and he had turned a full one-eighty degrees to face him.

“What difference does it make? I would’ve said yes-“

“It’s the principle of it all.” Eddie thumped his shoulder and Steve finally met his eyes. “‘s fuckin’ disrespectful to make those desisions for you. You gotta have control of your own life man.”

Steve knocked his head back against the stiff metal wall. He squeezed his eyes shut and let out a sigh from deep in his chest. He heard Eddie snicker from behind his palm. Steve smirked. 

“I don’t know, man.” Steve shook his head, eyes still closed. “I’m not an expert on stickin’ it to the man like you are.”
“I wasn’t always this smart.” Eddie sighed as if his extensive knowledge was a pure burden to him. “I had to learn the hard way.”

“Yeah,” Steve opened his eyes and leaned his head over to the other. “I don’t think I have the skills for that. I think I’m content on living my life according to everyone else around me.”

“You’re telling me you’d rather be miserable for the rest of your life than try to learn about yourself?” Eddie slapped the back of his hand into Steve’s chest. “That’s not the Harrignton I know.”

“Oh, yeah?” Steve found himself using the coy smirk, hooded eyes, and teasing tone he only pulled out when on a date. He decided to blame the slip up on momentary insanity. “Who’s this Harrignton you know so well?”

“The Harrignton I know would never back down from a challenge.” Eddie crossed his arms. “He’d run straight at it and get himself torn to pieces or beaten to a pulp in the process, but he’d get there. He wouldn’t give up, no matter how hard or uncomfortable it was.”

“He sounds like a cool guy.” Steve scoffed. 

A soft smile slowly formed over Eddie’s face. “He’s cooler than he gives himself credit for, that for damn sure.” Steve cocked a brow. Eddie continued. “If I had to guess, he’s too busy worrying if everyone he cares about is happy, and doesn’t allow himself to be happy.” 

“You my shrink now, Munson?” Steve looked away and rubbed a hand against his dry eyes. 

“Nah,” Eddie shrugged. “Just a loser who knows a thing or two about feeling like shit.” 

Steve wanted to argue, wanted to lie and say he felt fine. Totally, utterly, perfectly okay. Nothing about his secret-keeping, demon-fighting life was bothering him. Nothing at all to complain about. Not the friends he was constantly worried about losing. Not the sleepless nights he spent trying to scrub vivid memories from his hazy mind. Not the shitty dating cycle that made him feel like he’d never truly be loved. Not even the ex-girlfriend who symbolized a part of his life that he desperately wanted to return to. Because Steve Harrignton wasn’t afraid of change. He loved it, actually. Loved that he rarely saw his parents anymore. Loved that he slaved away at a retail job, rather than lurking the school halls with his loser friends. Loved the foreign buzzing feelings buried deep in his chest when he watched My Beautiful Laundrette with Robin. All good, Steve wanted to say, but he didn’t. 

There was a sharp knock on the van door and Eddie sprung for the open bathroom. Before he could lock himself away, Nancy was holding the door open and ushering everyone inside. Steve stood and stepped out of everyone’s way. He and Eddie watched silently as the other members of their group filed bags and boxes into the van. When Robin entered, she shoved a small bag into Steve’s chest.

“Got you a shirt.” Her tone was sharp and she didn’t hover to talk. She slumped to the back of the van and sat down. Steve didn’t ask; he didn’t need to. They’d talk later. They always did. 

Nancy closed the door once everyone was settled in. She was headed for the passenger’s seat when Steve found himself moving on autopilot.

“Hey, Nance.” He reached out an arm to stop her. She glanced up at him, confused. “Would you mind sitting in the back? I think Eddie was getting sore from cramming himself in that bathroom. I was gonna let him take shotgun.”

“Oh.” Nancy glanced over to Eddie, who stood behind Steve with furrowed brows. “Do you think that’s a good idea?”

Eddie looked from the back of Steve’s head, to Nancy’s similarly confused expression. Steve turned his head to nod slightly at Eddie. 

“Yeah, I guess.” Eddie nodded too, shifting his eyes back to Nancy. “It’s gettin’ dark. I think it’ll be fine.” 

“Oh. Okay then.” Nancy glanced between them a couple more times before she turned on her heel and headed for the back. 

Steve moved for the driver’s seat. When he sat down, he turned his head to find Eddie motionless behind him, watching intently. Steve patted the open passenger seat.

“C’mon man.” He nodded his head toward the seat. Eddie paused a moment more before he finally took one slow step, expecting Steve to revoke the offer before he sat down. Steve didn’t mention it. Instead, he shifted the gears and began to pull out of the lot. Eddie sat down quickly, wrapped the seat belt around his front, and pulled his knees to his chest. 

Eddie figured he must’ve fallen asleep at some point on the drive. He remembered closing his eyes to a narrow forest road, surrounded by towering trees. When he looked out again, all he saw was dull grassy fields that stretched on for miles. The RV was parked and he could hear the shuffling of bodies moving behind him. He dropped his feet to the ground, stretched out his back, and rubbed the sleep from his eyes. 

“Hey there, sleepyhead.” Steve had walked back to the front of the van. He had put on the new shirt Robin got him, Eddie’s vest over it. 

“Where are we?” Eddie glanced from Steve to the grassy flatland he could see through the window. 

“We’re just taking a rest.” Steve leaned against the back of Eddie’s seat. “Gettin’ everything ready, y’know?”

“Eddie!” Dustin ran over the moment he realized Eddie was awake.

“Hey.” Eddie yawned through his greeting. 

“Do you wanna help me make shields? We got these trash can lids and I’m thinking we stab nails through them-“

“Give him a second man, he just woke up.” Steve had put a firm hand on Dustin’s shoulder to quiet him. 

Eddie smiled. “It’s fine man.” He turned to Dustin. “Sounds sick, I’ll be out in a minute.”

Best and Worst Soulmate AUs

If you were in any fandom spaces in the 2000s-2010s, you’d know how prevalent soulmate AUs (alternate universes) were. I could probably write a whole thesis on why that happened, but that’s a rant for another blog. For those of you who don’t know, these soulmate AUs were writing or art prompts based around a piece of media and typically a specific ship (couple) from that fandom. Each soulmate AU was different, and I want to talk about some of my favorites, as well as some I despise. This will not even scrape the surface of all of them. I’m sure there are videos on youtube doing deep dives into this if you’re interested in learning more. I’ve been thinking about different fanfic tropes recently and I wanted to rate some of the ones I enjoy and diss the ones I don’t like. I’ll be doing multiple parts to this series, so stay tuned. 

1. Soulmate Initials AU

The premise of this AU is pretty self explanatory. Characters in this universe are born with the initials of their soulmate somewhere on their body, typically their wrist. Sometimes it’s not something they’re born with; rather, they receive the initials on their 18th birthday or some other special day. This AU is pretty solid and leads to a lot of really funny miscommunication tropes where a character thinks their soulmate is one person who’s initials match their wrist, while in reality it’s someone entirely different (ie, character A thinks their soulmate is Jane Smith, when actually it’s their sworn enemy, John Smitty). 

At the same time, if you have a character with a really unique name, it’s hard to create any of those miscommunication plot lines. It’s something hard to misunderstand and it makes finding one’s soulmate generally easy. I’m a sucker for a pining slow burn, so this trope isn’t always my favorite. However, I am also partial to the “finding out your soulmate is your enemy” trope, and this AU is perfect for that. In the end, I give this AU a solid 7/10.

2. Soulmate Writing Transfer AU

This AU can differentiate depending on the author, but the general premise is as follows. Characters in this universe will be able to write, draw, or doodle on their skin in any form of ink and said writing will appear on the skin of their soulmate. Some authors include tattoos into this, while others write that tattoos stay only on the one getting the tattoo willingly, rather than both the character and their soulmate. Besides the ambiguous state of tattoos in this trope, the writing on your soulmate’s skin will eventually wash off as it washes off your own skin. However, you and your soulmate would not be able to wash off something drawn by the other person. 

This AU is easily one of my favorites. I love the trope of an artistic character drawing on their hands all day while their soulmate is someone who has never even colored in a coloring book. There is an obvious caveat to this AU, which is that you could easily write sentences on your skin and quickly find out who your soulmate is. I think that takes the fun out of this AU, but it is still undeniably a possibility. I love this trope because I think that mindless doodles are sometimes the best way to get to know someone on a deeper level. Like, yeah, there is a reason I like to doodle cats on every blank piece of paper I see. Anyways, this AU is a 9/10 for me.

3. Color Blind Soulmate AU

This AU is difficult to explain because it ranges in complexity, but I’ll do my best to explain the general idea. In this universe, characters are born with the inability to see color, and won’t be able to see color until they meet their soulmate. It’s typically a gradual process of them gaining the ability to see color, but it’s generally obvious who/what caused the color to appear. In other versions of this AU, characters aren’t able to see a specific color, until they meet their soulmate. Often, this AU has a moment where character A looks into character B’s (their soulmate) eyes and suddenly they can see the color of their eyes after never being able to.

I forgot how much I loved this AU. If you’re a Homestuck like me, you’re probably familiar with this trope. There was a specific human character in Homestuck who had red eyes, which he hid with sunglasses, and this spurred a lot of fanfics with this AU. I think it’s a really sweet idea and I love how it plays on the concepts of color being brought back into someone’s life, metaphorically and literally. My only note is that this AU isn’t sad enough. I know that’s a weird issue to have, but I think a good AU has conflict built in, and this AU is pretty plain on that front. It’s something you’d see in a K-Drama, which isn’t bad by any means, but it is definitely a level of soft, fluffy romance that I’m not personally interested in. I give this AU a soft 8/10.

4. First/Last Words Soulmate AU

This AU is once again, pretty self explanatory. Characters in this universe are born with the first (or last) words that their soulmate will ever say to them. Typically, this is found on their wrist. Similar to the Soulmate Initials AU, there are versions of this AU where the words won’t appear till a certain age. This makes for a pretty cut and dry storyline. Often, stories with this AU will follow a character who is either desperate to find their soulmate and thus trying to manipulate conversations to lead into the quote on their wrist, or the exact opposite and the main character barely talks to anyone because they don’t want to meet their soulmate.

Finally an AU I absolutely hate. There is so much of this AU that I want to nit pick. What if my soulmate likes to talk and their first words to me span over the entirety of my forearm? What if their first word is something lame like “Hey” and I meet twenty other people whose first word to me is also “Hey”- How do I tell which is my soulmate? To be fair, some authors will work around this and write that the words on the character’s wrist will disappear/fade after they meet their soulmate. The only aspect of this AU that I’m interested in is the concept of knowing your soulmate’s late words to you. This easily leads to some of the most gut-wrenching angst you’ve ever read. One thing about me, I love some angst (if it isn’t obvious). However, this AU leans too far into the territory of those POV Tik Toks where the main character knows how long they have left to live. I don’t like those, I don’t wanna know when I’m gonna die, LAME. Only story that’s ever done that AU well is “They Both Die at the End” by Adam Silvera, and that’s strictly because of how well the universe around the characters is developed. Anyways, I hate this trope but it has the capability to be good so 4/10.

5. Soulmate First Touch AU

This AU is very much a dealer’s choice situation. The main version of this AU centers around a universe where characters will have some sort of marking on their body which indicates the point where their soulmate will first touch them. Sometimes these markings are  distinct birthmarks, moles, or freckles. Other times the markings will be less natural, like inky blobs or a clear imprint of a hand. This is not the only version of this AU though. Sometimes the first touch of a soulmate will lead into other AUs. For example, a character unable to see color might be touched by their soulmate and suddenly they can see color. Or a character may get visions of their future with their soulmate when they first touch. There are a lot of ways to play around with the other versions of this AU.

The base of this AU is something I enjoy quite a bit. I’ve always loved the idea of freckles being “angel kisses” and I find it even sweeter if those freckles/moles/birthmarks were given to you from a soulmate. This AU also leads to a lot of really silly, stupid moments in stories, like jokes about where a character’s soulmate mark is located. Like, what do you mean you have a giant birthmark on your neck? Is your soulmate going to choke you out the first time you meet??? As for the other versions of this AU, I’m not sure how I feel. It feels like an afterthought that ties this AU into other, previously existing AUs. I think this AU works well on its own and I really love the implications of it. I especially love an AU that goes hand in hand with this one; a universe where your birthmark(s) is where you suffered a fatal injury in another life OR your birthmark(s) show where you will suffer a fatal injury in the future. Once again, this spurs so many questions and interesting plot points. Anyways, solid AU and as someone with a lot of moles and freckles, I hold this AU dear to me. 10/10

guess what cured my writers block…

guys, can you guess? 
Story pin imageStory pin imageStory pin image
you’re right. it was the compelling relationship between to male characters with depressing backstories from a koren television show that recently came out with it’s second season. anyways, here’s a draft of the first chapter of a fanfic i recently started. it follows the plot of squid game (specifically folowing thanos and namgyu’s characters…), expect the main difference is there is no drug use. i think both thanos and namgyu would be really compelling/more compelling characters if they were sober during squid game, so im using this fic to explore that idea. this first chapter is just an introduction to that idea, but if you guys enjoy this, there will be more. or you can hunt down my ao3 account lol.
also this has not been beta read and im dyslexic so if there are any spelling errors, just ignore them thank you.

trigger warning for implied suicide attempt, reference drug use/addiction, and general mature themes. 

 

EPISODE 00 – Playing with Fate

On the North end of the Hangang bridge, Choi Su-bong stood with a cross-shaped locket in his hand. He had taken it off of his neck and let it sit limp in the palm of his hand as he held it out over the railing. The lingering high that still clouded his mind told him to close his fist and shove the locket back in his pocket. The longer he stood there, the more Su-bong could feel himself sobering up. His sober mind made his hand tremble, daring him to throw the necklace in the river and then jump in after it. 

Su-bong glanced past the necklace, down to the dark blue of the Han river. Even as the sunset blackened out the sky, the river was a starkly different shade of black. It dominated the darkness, hiding beneath secrets that no man had ever lived to tell. Su-bong found himself pulled toward that secretive pit. With the state his life was in, he figured diving into the endless void below him was the only productive way to drown his sorrows. There was no point in driving himself into more debt to pay for drugs when death is the strongest drug of them all. 

“Sir.”

Su-bong felt a strong hand grab onto his shoulder, pulling him back into the present moment. He jumped at the sudden movement and the necklace in his palm slipped from his grip. He clasped down onto what he hoped was the chain, but as he wiped his head back to his hand, the locket was nowhere to be seen. 

“Shit.”

“I’m sorry, did I startle you?” The stranger removed his hand from Su-bong’s shoulder, sliding it into the pocket of his slacks. 

Su-bong took a moment to acknowledge the strange man. He was dressed nicer than anyone had any business being at this time of night. In his other hand, the man held a small briefcase. Su-bong figured it couldn’t hold much more than a laptop and some books, if that. He gave the man another once-over, brows furrowed.

“I didn’t mean to alarm you.” The man continued. “I simply came to make you an offer.”

“Tch,” Su-bong rolled his eyes and turned away from the man. “I’m not interested, dude.”

“Is there a reason you haven’t jumped yet?”

Su-bong wiped his head around again. “The fuck did you just say?”

The man held his hands up with a coy smile. “Perhaps you’re waiting for someone to come change your mind, hmm? Is that it?”

“You don’t know shit about me, man.” Su-bong pressed two fingers against the man’s chest and pushed his back. 

“I know you’re different from most of the people I talk with.” The man raised his briefcase, withdrew his hand from his pocket, and opened the case. 

Faintly illuminated by the flickering lamp posts, Su-bong found himself staring down at stacks of won and two sets of ddakji tiles. Su-bong stared blankly at the cash. He knew the won in the suitcase couldn’t even pay off ten percent of his debt. Unless he could pay off all his debt at once, Su-bong knew he’d end up spending the money on drugs. And as much as he didn’t want to admit it, the drugs were simply postponing his inevitable fate at the bottom of the Han river. 

“I know that this means little to nothing to you.” The man shut the suitcase and lowered it. “You wouldn’t be standing here if you cared about a couple thousand won.”

“What’s your point?” Su-bong rubbed a hand over his face.

“What if I told you that there was a way you could make billions of won simply by playing childhood games, such as ddakji.”

Su-bong scoffed. “I’d say you’re crazier than me, bro.”

The man smiled and reached into the breast pocket of his suit jacket. He pulled out a rectangular business card and held it out. Su-bong stared down at the brown card and the three simple shapes that were printed on the top. 

“Just call the number on the back.” The man maintained eye contact, still smiling in a way that made Su-bong’s stomach turn. 

Su-bong took the card. He flipped it over and, sure enough, there was a number on the back. He glanced up at the man once more, still unsure. 

“You’re serious?”

“Very.” The man straightened out the front of his suit jacket, squared his shoulders, then stepped back. “That is all. Have a good night.”

“Yeah, thanks.” Su-bong didn’t put much emphasis behind the farewell, more focused on the vague card in his hand. 

He flipped the card between his fingers. The simple design left much to the imagination, but regardless of whether or not the strange man was telling the truth, this was definitely a second option that Su-bong now had to consider. He could either drop the card and proceed with the fate he assumed was set in stone, or he could call the number on the back of the brown rectangle and play a game with fate. 

The longer Su-bong stared down at the nondescript card, the more curious he grew. A fresh start was what he needed. If he could pay off his debt, he’d change his whole life around. He’d never indulge in any of his vices ever again. He’d use any leftover cash he had to buy his mother a nice house in the countryside. He wouldn’t expect her to take him back in, but he’d do anything in his power to give her a comfortable life in her old age. Maybe he’d go back to school, study business and settle into a corporate job like his mom always wanted. All of that sounded better than spending the rest of eternity at the base of the Han river, while his poor mother wondered what she did to raise such a worthless brat. 

Su-bong rubbed a hand over his face again. He could feel his brain pulsing against the sides of his skull, as if trying to break open and spill down his face. He squeezed his eyes shut and swore under his breath. He needed a drink, a pill, anything. All he had was a stupid business card and the vague promise of billions. Su-bong groaned, shoved the card in his pocket, then turned back toward the Dongjak district.

Richie Rambles: The Best Video Game You’ve Never Played

Yes, the title is presumptuous of me, but I’m 99.9% sure you haven’t played this game. Unlike my other deep-dives on video games that interest me, this will simply be a ramble about why I love this game so much. If it’s interesting to anyone, I will gladly do a deep-dive! Regardless of what you think by the end of this blog, this game is cheap on Steam and you should play it. 

The day is June 14th, 2011. I am simply a baby, I have no idea the importance of this day. For on this day the game Alice: Madness Returns is released. This game follows the main character, Alice Liddell, and her adventures through Wonderland. In this game, Alice lost her parents and sister in a house fire. This fire severely burnt Alice and, after being accused of starting the fire, Alice was forced to live in an asylum. She is watched by a doctor (who only traumatizes her more), until being transferred to a home for wayward children. She is treated horribly by the staff and other children who live there, as many believe her to be a murder (at worst) or simply a weirdo (at best). 

The artstyle of the game is my favorite part. With this grim twist on Alice in Wonderland, playing around with character designs and the settings is the most vital part- and this game does an excellent job. The dark and dingy normal world, the steampunk land where the Mad Hatter lives, the colorful and dangerous forest where you first meet the Cheshire cat- Everything is detailed perfectly. Every character is throughout in design, personality, and storyline. Despite the dark twist, the familiar characters of Alice in Wonderland still have many of their recognizable traits. The Chesire cat is playful and mysterious, the Queen of Hearts is power hungry and fueled by rage, and the Caterpillar is a wise oracle. 

My favorite part is that, to go along with these new environments, Alice gets a new outfit! It’s a minor detail, but it’s vital in keeping everything cohesive. 

While the story is very dark, and I definatly encourage people to be careful before playing (not only to watch out for gore, but also for the dark topics), I still highly encourage anyone interested to do more research and play this game! The gameplay is difficult, but fun, and the graphics are a bit outdated, but it adds to the charm. This game is one of the best examples of a story told through the video game medium (in my opinion) and more people should know about it!!

Richie Rambles: My Hero Academia

In this first installment of this new series, I (Richie) am going to be rambling about My Hero Academia. Back in 2018, when MHA first started coming out, I was introduced to the manga. I believe this was my first introduction to manga and one of my first interactions with anime as a whole. My memory of back then is very blurry, so I’m not sure how I found out about it but I’m sure it was the internet. I’ve always been a big nerd. 2018 was the same year that the new generation of Voltron was coming to an end, so my nerdy 11 year old self needed a new thing to fixate on. MHA it was! I was also learning about Homestuck around this time, but that’s a conversation for another day.

Anyways, I don’t remember much about how I originally felt about MHA. I know it was a big deal; it was something I was passionate about for years despite the fact I never actually watched the anime (I read the manga… not sure how well I kept up though). I was heavily involved in fandom spaces online. I was able to log back into my middle school Wattpad account last year and I found a bunch of MHA fanfics… Maybe I’ll revise some and publish them here in the future. MHA also got me much more involved in cosplay. Voltron was definitely my cosplay journey beginning, but I had never met another cosplayer in real life until I joined the MHA fandom. A couple of my longest friends are people I met through the MHA cosplay fandom, actually. 

Long story short, MHA was really important to me for a long while. Then, I’m not sure exactly when this happened, but I found a new interest and I went through that period where I thought that everything I enjoyed in middle school was cringe and lame and I didn’t like it anymore. After about two years of a really bad depressive episode, I realized I actually enjoyed being cringe and I wanted to re-introduce myself to all the interests I abandoned for those two years. I started with cosplay and shows like Monster High and My Little Pony. I started watching new anime and reading new manga that my friends recommended. I felt like myself for the first time in a while.

The past few months, I’ve been rediscovering my (early) middle school interests. It started with tracking down 5-6 year old musically cosplay compilations on youtube and eventually I began rewatching Voltron. Then, last month, I heard that MHA was finally coming to an end. I had seen some leaked panels from the manga circulating online and I found myself slipping back into the fandom space. I realized how much the fandom had changed over the years, and how much I had missed it. I also remember that Netflix had added the first four seasons of MHA to their streaming service. Since I had never watched the anime, I really wanted to watch it from start to finish, in preparation for the end of the series. I have a really bad attention span though, and I knew the only way to keep my focus would be if I watched it with my family. I gave a brief description to my family, and they agreed!

So far, we’ve just about finished the first two seasons. Everyone loves it so far. My dad’s favorite character is Present Mic, and he loves quoting All Might’s “I AM HERE” at any random time in the day. My mom relates to Aizawa and All Might (when he’s in his weak form). My sibling loves Tsuyu and they agreed to cosplay from MHA with me for an upcoming convention! We also have been playing the MHA card game as a family and it’s a very fun game. We’ve actually owned it for years (probably since 2018) but we’d never played it before. I highly recommend it to anyone who’s curious!

Anyways, that is all for today! Oh, for anyone curious, Kirishima is my favorite character!