The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes: A Spoiler-Free Review

Ah, The Ballad of Songbirds of Snakes. This book got me through my hospital stay and refueled my fleeting love for The Hunger Games series. I bought the book right when it released, but only got around to reading it this month. I was a little wary to read a novel where the protagonist was 18-year-old Coriolanus Snow, of all people, but I fairly enjoyed it!

P.S.: If you’re reading this review, I’m going to assume you’re already familiar with the Hunger Games series, so I won’t be explaining the events of the previous books or avoiding spoilers from them. You have been warned!

The book takes place sixty-four years before the events of the first Hunger Games novel, but it still very much so takes place in the future. In this book, we’re reminded just how far ahead Panem is. Even so far into the past, we’re still greeted with wonderful science-fiction elements as we were in the original trilogy and a glimpse of the ruins of what used to be North America. 

In short, the book tells the story of the 10th annual Hunger Games and Coriolanus’s involvement in them. This was the first time mentors were introduced, and they happened to be the graduating class of the Academy, which is essentially high school for the Capitol. We get introduced to how several aspects of the games were introduced, and most were proposed by Coriolanus himself. Even some the songs of the series were written and performed by another main character, Lucy Gray Baird.

Speaking of Lucy Gray, the two have a budding romance, and hearing the thoughts of Coriolanus, it can’t help but make you feel uncomfortable. From the very beginning, you can tell something is off in the wording of his thoughts, and it isn’t until later on when it sets in that something just isn’t right. However, the wholesomeness of young love really does shadow over it in the beginning, and I couldn’t help but wish the best for the two while ignoring the red flags.

Young Coriolanus Snow
Official illustration of 18-year-old Coriolanus Snow.
Lucy Gray Baird
Fan-made Illustration of Lucy Gray Baird by mathilde’s art blog on Tumblr

I definitely wouldn’t be the first person to write that I found Coriolanus’s character FASCINATING. He’s written as the protagonist, and at first you can’t help but root for him. Sure, he starts out with little moments here and there that make you question his character, but it’s just a result of his upbringing, right? That’s the way you think throughout the book, and while I can’t say much here, watching his character devolve was exciting and heartbreaking at the same time. While reading, you forget what President Snow did and how he was in the original trilogy, which makes you forget that this is supposed to be a villain origin story. His character is complex and captivating, and I couldn’t help but hope that somehow everything would end up okay. 

Lucy Gray was by far my favorite character in this story, however. She was the tribute assigned to Coriolanus and instantly captivated both the audience in universe and and out. She was a member of the Covey and resided in District 12- The same district Katniss Everdeen would eventually be a citizen of. She serves as one of the biggest connectors to the culture of the Districts.

Overall, I loved the commentary that came with Snow’s character mentioned above and the lovely writing and imagery in the book. The callbacks to the original trilogy were wonderful bonuses, and the characters were all super engaging and fun to read about. I also ADORED the main antagonist, Dr. Gaul. However, my biggest gripes with the story has to be the pacing. It’s EXTREMELY slow at the beginning, and sometimes it just feels as if events are being thrown in to make the story more entertaining before the Hunger Games. That would have been more okay if the pacing of the story didn’t kick off and go a million miles an hour at the third part. It just felt very underwhelming, but it definitely make you think while reading, which is a great aspect to have in your writing.

I give The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes 3/5 stars.

SCP 3300 ‘The Rain’ Review

What if I told you there was a place where every year, people changed.  Well that’s obvious, everyone changes, but I mean really changes.  Somewhere where every year, everyone becomes someone new entirely.  Well that somewhere is the small town of Clearwater, Montana.  Once a year it begins to rain.  It is a light rain at first; then it becomes a violent storm.  The storm takes all who once were, and recycles them into new.  The old are gone, the rain misses them, they have to go to it.  Each year the rain dissolves each person into water; it then reforms them into new people that are always different from before.  The foundation has had trouble studying this phenomenon because when the event starts no one can enter; no one can leave.  Everyone in the town becomes a totally different person with no memory of their previous self. 

Rain can seem dreary, but also represents life and rebirth.  This is an ironic truth in the case of Clearwater.  The event is typically in June and lasts for six to eighteen days.  For the first forty eight hours, it is light and calm rain; however after that it becomes a violent thunderstorm that will last until the event ends.  Any attempts by the foundation to enter the town during an event have failed, either by loss of personnel, or emerging on the other side of the town; just like it was never even there.  If a resident of Clearwater is absent for the event, they will simply disappear.  There is also an effect on people who do not live in the town to quickly lose focus while talking about the town or its citizens.  They do not forget about it, simply have trouble paying attention to it.  

Our main source of information comes from a girl who was keeping a journal during one of the events, and the journal was recovered by the SCP foundation.  A young woman identified as ‘Margaret Lane’ was the author, in the event of 1995. 

The SCP Foundation is a fictional organization that focuses on capturing “anomalies” aka, anything that may have special powers or can break the natural laws.  SCP stands for Secure, Contain, Protect, the foundations goal is to keep these creatures in check while studying them and keeping the public from knowing the truth.  They seem to be a morally gray organization as they are fine with doing inhumane experiments on harmless and even friendly creatures.    

Check out the story of SCP 3300 and others here: https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/scp-3300

The people of clearwater are not exactly people, well in the normal sense that we think of people.  For most of the time they are people, down to their DNA, as the foundation can not find anything anomalous about the citizens in themselves.  During the 3300 event something changes, every resident of Clearwater, Montana dies by being turned into water that makes up this storm that is the anomaly.  The storm then makes a new set of people, who think they have lived in Clearwater for their whole lives.  The new people behave very strangely during the event, but once it is over they seem to be perfectly normal citizens of a small town.  They retain no memory of being made by the storm, or their previous selves.  The dreams give us clues into the start of this occurrence, some form of ritual that started when a village tried to save itself from destruction.  They did in a way save themselves by becoming part of the storm, but it came at the cost of continual, tragic loss of life, even if they may not exactly be what we consider ‘normal humans’.  

The story of Clearwater may seem like mere fiction, but can also be considered in a more philosophical sense.  If you think about it, the citizens of Clearwater are experiencing the same thing as everyone else, just at a much more accelerated rate.  We all will eventually succumb to death, and no matter where you run or where you hide, it is inevitable.  We can all learn a thing or two from Margaret and her friends struggles.  You should enjoy the life you have while you have it, before you are whisked away and gone forever, doomed to be forgotten in the unforgiving winds of time.  So ask yourself, is it really so different from us?  Maybe you are a thrill seeker, or maybe you stay shut up in your house, scared of the outside world.  But no one wants to die; not even those who say they do.  Those who wish to take their own life only do so as a last resort, as the only way that they can see out, but even they do not truly want to die.  It is just because their situation has become so bad, they wish to end it by any means.   If they had a better life, if they weren’t so stressed, if, if, if, if…you get the idea.  You have a natural instinct to survive, every creature does.  Live, eat, drink, sleep, repeat.  Did you know you can’t snap your own neck?  Go ahead, try it, it doesn’t matter how strong you are, it’s impossible.  It’s because your brain won’t let you use all of your strength as it knows it will most likely end to your death, so it keeps you from doing it.  Maybe we can all learn to appreciate life a little more from now on, because we never know when our time is up.

 

Lord, Oh Lorde Part Tres (3)

This is the last installment of my analysis on Lorde’s Solar Power album. As with my last two parts, just as a disclaimer, this is my initial listen on all songs. I’ll then be giving my raw thoughts afterwards as I interpret the song. Last post, we stopped on “The Man with the Axe” which leads us into “Dominoes.” Feel free to listen along to the album songs as you read my thoughts on them. Links will be provided. 🙂

8. Dominoes

Lyrics

I heard that you were doing yoga
With Uma Thurman’s mother
Just outside of Woodstock
Now you’re watering all the flowers
You planted with your new girlfriend
Outside on the rooftop
Just another phase you’re rushing on through
Go all New Age, outrunning your blues
Fifty gleaming chances in a row
And I watch you flick them down like dominoes
Must feel good being Mr. Start Again
I know
Know a girl who knows a
Another girl who knows the woman that you hurt
It’s strange to see you smoking marijuana
You used to do the most cocaine
Of anyone I’d ever met
Just another phase you’re shooting on through
The whole world changes right around you
You get fifty gleaming chances in a row
And I watch you flick them down like dominoes
Must feel good being Mr. Start Again
Yeah, it must feel good being Mr. Start Again
Don’t get up
Yeah, it must feel good being Mr. Start Again
 

Raw Thoughts:
 
This track, it feels calming in a way. There’s this nice, simple beat that continues throughout with flickers of new additional sounds that pop up fittingly. It’s one of those beats that make you just wanna say back and forth. 
 
With the lyrics themselves, the beginning lines make me think she’s singing about someone who’s older to have experienced Woodstock with Uma Thurman’s mother. This person is also a party spirit I can imagine from the copious amounts of cocaine they seemed to used to do. He seems like a fun guy, “Mr. Start Again.” Also, the second to last line of, “Don’t get up,” gives me more reason to believe he’s someone older. 
 
My biggest question is whether this is someone Lorde knows personally, or if this is just a random narrative about someone fictitious. This person who has changed with a seasoned reputation in life. Who are they?
 
 
9.Big Star
 
Lyrics
 
 
Everyone knows that you’re too good for me, don’t they?
I’m a cheater, I lie, and I’m shy
But you like to say hello to total strangers
Shivering pines and walls of colour
I can’t believe I used to stay inside
But every perfect summer’s gotta say good night
Now I watch you run through the amber line
I used to love the party, now I’m not alright
Drinking in the dark, take me home tonight
Baby, you’re a big star
You’re a big star
Wanna take your picture
I toss up if it’s worth it now
Every time I get on a plane
I’vе got so much to tell you
And not enough time to do it in
But еvery perfect summer’s gotta take its flight
I’ll still watch you run through the winter light
I used to love the party, now I’m not alright
Hope the honeybees make it home tonight
Baby, you’re a big star
You’re a big star
Wanna take your picture
‘Til I die
‘Til I die
‘Til I die
 

Raw Thoughts:
 
This is a negative-self view song. It differs from the perspective I think the other songs have been in because they remained more as a positive new self Lorde sung about. Reflecting back to the beginning track though, “The Path”, I remember the journey it mentioned. If this album is symbolic to that journey, this may be the hard parts where she’s grown from.
 
I do think talking bad about herself, causes the descriptions of this “Big Star” to be even more grand than if it had been if described on its own. 
 
There is still growth shown nonetheless besides the ‘hate talk’. Towards the beginning of the track there is mention of how she became isolated and drank more, then it shifts to her on plane rides. I do sense there is more productivity in the routine with this line, but afterwards with, “I’m not alright,” obviously it shows this is only the start regaining balance.
 
 
10. Leader of a New Regime
 
 
Lyrics
 
Wearing SPF 3000 for the ultraviolet rays
Made it to the island on the last of the outbound planes
Got a trunk full of Simone and Céline
And of course my magazines
I’m gonna live out my days
Won’t somebody, anybody, be the leader of a new regime?
Free the keepers of the burnt-out scene
Another day, lust and paranoia reigns supreme
We need the leader of a new regime
 

 
Raw Thoughts:
 
This continues the story! “Made it to the island on the last of the outbound planes” In the last song she was getting on the plane, now she mentions her destination was to an island. This changes everything. If we’re following the album’s story, I feel like I must have missed a shift earlier that the album took. When the album was starting with “Solar Power” and talking about not having any cell service and being on beaches…(*wink wink*)…where we seem to be going back to? 
 
This is where I’m not sure. Did I miss something? I’m not sure whether right now with this track if Lorde is going back to the beaches and island bliss or if the album started there and then began a flashback to show why Lorde went to the beaches/islands in the first place. 
 
Also, “Free the keepers of the burnt-out scene.” This line right here makes me wonder if she is referring to herself as one of these keepers because she is going to get her freedom. Then, the next line mentions that so far nothing is changing. Acknowledging the problem but then not volunteering to fix it, I think she is saying someone else needs to step up. Obviously I hope it doesn’t go as literal to mean she is done with music now. Please no 🙁 I must have just misunderstood… *gulp*
 
This song may be short, but it is vital to the story-telling of the album. I can’t wait to see if the next song answers my questions.
 
 
11. Mood Ring
 
 
Lyrics
 
I’m tryna blow bubbles, but inside
Can’t seem to fix my mood
Today it’s as dark as my roots
If I, if I ever let them grow out (ah-ah)
Now all of my oceans have riptides
Can’t seem to find what’s wrong
The whole world is letting me down
Don’t you think the early 2000s seem so far away? (Ay-ay-ay-ay)
Ladies, begin your sun salutations
Transcendental in your meditations (love and light)
You can burn sage, and I’ll cleanse the crystals
We can get high, but only if the wind blows (blows just right)
I can’t feel a thing
I keep looking at my mood ring
Tell me how I’m feeling
Floating away, floating away
I’m tryna get well from the inside
Plants and celebrity news, all the vitamins I consume
Let’s fly somewhere eastern, they’ll have what I need (they’ll have what I need)
Let’s go
Ladies, begin your sun salutations
Pluto in Scorpio generation (love and light)
You can burn sage, and I’ll cleanse the crystals
We can get high, but only if the wind blows (blows just right, ri-ri-ri-right)
I can’t feel a thing
I keep looking at my mood ring
Tell me how I’m feeling
Floating away, floating away
All the sad girls sing
We’ll keep dancing ’til the mood rings
Tell us how we’re feeling
We’re floating away, floating away
Take me to some kinda
Take me to some kinda
Take me to some kinda place (anywhere)
Watch the sun set, look back on my life (take me to some kinda)
I just wanna know, will it be alright? (Take me to some kinda)
Take me to some kinda place (anywhere)
 

 
Raw Thoughts:
 
And, the story continued. (I don’t think that was a complete sentence. The story isn’t either though, so it should be okay.) Here we are, this feels like Lorde has made it to the island and doesn’t exactly know how to heal. The song does seem to have a spirituality to it. With the mention of the astrological of “Pluto in Scorpio generation” and then again with the mentioning of crystals and sage, an herb known for cleansing. She is trying to find ways to shake off the negative energy that has brought her down in the rest of the album. It feels like a fresh start.
 
I think the use of saying she needs a mood ring to understand her emotions is such a clever thing to have done. To my knowledge, mood rings are almost known as a youthful, childish-even, thing. Also, with the line about her reflecting on how “far away” the 2000s seem shows that she is thinking to the past. Possibly even to a time when she was younger and may have possessed a mood ring, except this time the ring has new purpose for her now. It’s all very poetic and stunning.
 
Sounds amazing as well! This is truly all circling back to the beginning of the album and feeling so cohesive in its storytelling. I’m impressed.
 
 
12. Oceanic Feeling  (Final Track)   🙁
 
Lyrics
 
It’s a blue day
We could jump Bulli
When I hit that water
When it holds me
I think about my father
Doing the same thing
When he was a boy
When he was a boy
It’s a blue day
We could go fishing
You’ll cast the big one
Ah
Sliding the knife under the skin
Grateful for this offering
And all the living things
Under the sun
Under the sun
Little brother
I think you’re an angel
I see your silver chain levitate
When you’re kick-flipping
Baby boy, you’re super cool
I know you’re scared, so was I
But all will be revealed in time (time, time)
Oh, look, the rays are in the bay now
Can you hear the waves and the cicadas all around?
I can make anything real
Rays so hot, it’s a summer body
Everyday is blue and never cloudy
Don’t look down
I can make anything real
In the future
If I have a daughter
Will she have my waist?
Or my widow’s peak?
My dreamer’s disposition, or my wicked streak?
Will she split a tab with her lover?
Laugh with the stars like her mother
When she was a girl
When she was a girl
Now the cherry black lipstick’s gathering dust in a drawer
I don’t need her anymore
‘Cause I got this power
Just had to breathe
(Breathe out, breathe out, breathe out, breathe out)
And tune in (tune in, tune in, tune in, tune in)
Just had to breathe
(Breathe out, breathe out, breathe out, breath out)
And tune in (tune in, tune in, tune in, tune in)
I just had to breathe
And tune in
I just had to breathe
And tune in
Just had to breathe
Oh, has enlightenment found?
No, but I’m trying, taking it one year at a time
Oh-oh, can you hear the sound?
It’s shimmering higher
On the beach, I’m building a pyre
(Used the wood brought in by the tide)
I-I know you’ll show me how
I’ll know when it’s time to take off my robes
And step into the choir
 

 
Raw Thoughts:
 
 
She’s got it. She’s on the right track. This song is living proof of that because she has grown enough on this album to look outward from herself. She is singing about not only herself but also her family, and it’s super sweet. Finding comfort in the ocean and relating it to her father was everything. Hearing Lorde give messages to her little brother and just tell him like, ‘I see you. I went through the same thing. You got this.’ It’s just so refreshing to hear. After all the struggle this feels like a great close off.
 
She doesn’t need her cherry black lipstick anymore I feel has to be a reference I can’t realize at the moment. There’s a confidence that I enjoy seeing. After hearing of the hard times along the album, I’m glad to see Lorde take a stand.  Her healing process feels like it’s becoming complete. Her growth is going to take off from here. 
 
The little bit at the end about having not reached enlightenment was nice to here. I think it’s a message people need to hear. Sometimes you just have to take it one small bit by a time to stay okay, or better. 
 
This song feels like it has caught up to “Solar Power’s” point of life progression-like we’ve officially caught back up from the flashback the album took. Now though, we caught up and kept going, and I think that was the point. I feel satisfied as a listener with this ending. The album and collection of tracks feels like a whole, solid artwork. It’s masterful.
 
I’m so glad I got the opportunity to delve deep into looking at all the little gears that turn for this album to work so well. I’ve always been a fan of Lorde since her debut album, and nothing has changed after hearing this one.
 
Also, thanks for reading! I hope you enjoyed this as much as I did making it.
 
I obviously can’t wait to see what she does next. Until then though, I think she’s taught me to just live in the moment and until the moment comes: “Breathe out, and tune in”  ♥
 
 
 

The Chaos Chapter: Freeze (Part One)

Introduction

Ahh, welcome back to the second installment of the Tomorrow X Together review series! In this blog, I’ll be reviewing four songs from their second studio album The Chaos Chapter: Freeze. I’m working my way back in their discography, so in the next post about them, I’ll discuss the other four songs, then we’ll move on to min1sode: Blue Hour. Freeze was their most recent release when I discovered the group, so I hold it near and dear to my heart—-and that means you have to like it too! If you want to listen to the album yourself, you can do so here: https://open.spotify.com/album/5Zdr9vactwnJH4Vpe9Mid9?si=LsDSOcS_Rd6GWvHBgbvRmQ

OR

…you could…

…you know…

…take a few minutes to stream the “Frost” Music Video that dropped Wednesday…

Just an idea.

 

 Before We Get Into It   Because this is a blog mostly viewed by my peers, I make the choice to use the simple English translations from the reliable sources available to me and discuss those versions of the writing. They are not perfect reflections of the original writing, and unfortunately, they cannot capture the nuance of the writers’ words. If you enjoy music in languages that you yourself are not fluent in, I strongly encourage you to seek commentary on your favorite tracks from native speakers!! I find it really fun/interesting to research elements of music that cannot be conveyed through translation software, regardless of how advanced it might be, and it can be super helpful in getting you the full picture of what the artist(s) intended to capture and/or accomplish with their work.

Anti-Romantic

In this track, the writers tell the story of a person developing intense romantic feelings for a person, despite having sworn off love.  It is a catchy pop ballad infused with R&B that is representative of the conflicting feelings of wanting to be in a relationship but being petrified by the consequences of such vulnerability. Of course, there is the initial irony of a narrator describing how uninterested the are in romantic activities and emotions in a poetic love song; the mere existence of the song is a testament to the power of the narrator’s feelings, and makes the experience that much more intense for listeners. There are many references to romantic tropes shown in contemporary media, such as buying a person chocolates and watching Rom-Com films. These ideas are starkly contrasted with metaphor of the speaker’s heart both burning like and being burnt by a fire: “My heart is already chasing after you / And burning with small embers…/ As my entire heart burns / I’m afraid that only black ashes will remain…” Despite being a story of realizing that one has begun to fall in love, the tone is generally pessimistic, and this helps the audience to feel the turmoil of the speaker and sympathize with their fear of opening up to a person, only for them to end up a stranger again. “Anti-Romantic” has a compelling message, and the beautiful writing amplifies that, making it one of the group’s most popular songs. 

 

0X1=LOVESONG (I Know I Love You) ft. Seori 

“0X1=LOVESONG (I Know I Love You)” is the title track of Freeze, and it is the predecessor to the “emocore” version that was released in the repackaged version of the album. The name of the song is a call toward the lyrics “In this world of zero / I know you’re my one and only” that refer to the subject of the song being the speaker’s only salvation from a harsh world. It is about choosing to believe in love despite the depravity of the world around the speaker, and it is an incredibly emotional piece. Repeating the lines: “Say you love me, say you love me / Till the end of the world (I love you) / All or nothing, I want all of you / I know I love you (You)” speaks to the narrator’s desperation to sacrifice themselves to this relationship. The manner in which the speaker tells about their experience is abrasive and intense, reflecting how consuming their emotions are. Many lines reference ice and being frozen, all of which tie back into the “Freeze” concept. On a less academic note, this song severely hurt my feelings. “I’m full of problems, love sick / No way to go / I was fine to die / I’m a loser in this game / The only (one) rule of this world / Save me / Take my hand / Please use me like a drug (I know I love you)” had me distraught on the bathroom floor, please—-the sensations described are so raw and painful and so accurate to the pains of a longing heart. I personally think it was a perfect choice for a title track; it set the tone for the release of the full album, and it showed Tomorrow X Together’s versatility when it comes to genre and subject matter. It is 100% near the top of the list of my favorite songs from this album!

 

Magic

Magic, my beloved! As one can tell from even the first few seconds, it is more bright and cheerful than the previous tracks, which makes for a refreshing listening experience. Like all the songs on the album, there are allusions to the Freeze concept with lines such as “Stuck in one place so cold / Feeling like my heart just froze”. The band themselves have interpreted the song and its accompanying music video as amplifying the message that “human emotions are the real magic rather than a magical future,” and during an interview with Good Morning America, member Yeonjun said, “‘Magic’ is about your magical ability to melt me.” I really appreciate how the writers use repetition without making the song feel monotonous. The bridge of “Everybody clap your hands / If you’ve got a broken heart just take a chance (Chance) / I say everybody clap your hands” adds a unique element to the song of the speaker being so enthralled in this connection that they feel compelled to share it with the rest of the world so they can feel the same joy. It’s just a fun, catchy, disco-pop song with the uplifting message that a person can find genuine happiness in their romantic relationships, which, as implied in “Anti-Romantic”, is a reality that was once perceived as being unfeasible. I tend to gravitate to more melancholy music, but this song reeled me in the moment I pressed play, and I’ve been addicted ever since.

Ice Cream

I have to give “Ice Cream” the title of most underrated song from this album, and maybe even from Tomorrow X Together’s entire discography. It just screams dystopia, from the upbeat tone veiling the dark lyrics to the awareness of inescapable surroundings that the speaker can (seemingly) do nothing to combat. In the song, ice cream is a metaphor for happiness, and knowing the meaning behind the song gives it an eerie feel when listening to what, on the surface, sounds like another summer bop from the group. The speaker makes a wish that everyone in the world will feel the same negative emotions that they do, and now they all are screaming desperately for an ounce of hope and joy. Many people make the assumption that all of the group’s songs are upbeat with messages of pleasantries and gladness because they do not take the time to research translations of the lyrics, and they dismiss “Ice Cream” as being a filler track; it pays homage to the human frustration of not wanting to be positive all the time, and the idea that bad times can simply be bad without covering them in a layer of inauthentic, sugary meaning. Being a bit spiteful and wishing for others to feel the same negative emotions, is an incredibly human thing to feel, and not many people are willing to acknowledge that piece of themselves, especially popular artists.

The Holy Trinity: Alice in Borderland

I have, once again, decided to hurt my own feelings. In four days, I watched three of the most popular dramas on Netflix: Alice in Borderland, Sweet Home, and Squid Game. These shows have reignited my love for screenwriting, and each time I finish one of them, I find myself in awe of the creators and their skillful writing. I want to review the techniques that made these shows so memorable for me, starting with the one that has been out the longest: Alice in Borderland (2020). There won’t be any spoilers in this review, but if you want to go in blind, this is the place to stop.

To make something great, a writer needs a genuinely interesting premise, and the creator of the manga, Haro Aso, had just that. An obsessive, apathetic gamer and his two friends unexpectedly find themselves stuck in a barren version of Tokyo, and they are forced to compete in a series of deadly games in order to extend their visas, which are the only things sparing them from execution. It speaks directly to a generation of video-game enthusiasts who are constantly searching for ways to immerse themselves.

Yoshiki Watabe and Yasuko Kuramitsu created the actual Netflix series. They have a distinct way of making the audience care about the characters, despite their flaws and the limited amount of time we got to know them. While the main character, Arisu, wants an escape from his life, he does not choose to enter this post-apocalyptic city; neither does anyone else who is forced to join it. This makes us automatically sympathetic to most of the people we are introduced to, as they are all frightened and confused by the circumstances they find themselves in. Because this is a survival drama, we go in knowing that not all of the characters we have grown attached to will make it to the final episode. However, the character writing is so compelling that we allow ourselves to care anyway, which amplifies the intensity of the emotions we feel when they inevitably lose their lives to the game. It also fuels our hatred for the antagonist, the gamemaster, and the fact that we share this feeling of anger with the protagonist emphasizes our connection to him. We, the audience, have the same desire as he does: for him and his comrades to survive.

In my opinion, one of the most interesting literary devices used in the story’s creation is the use of foreshadowing with the playing cards. After a player has registered for a game, they are shown a digital version of the playing card they are competing for; the type of card indicates what the player will be tested on, and the number determines the difficulty level of the game. Spades are a challenge of physicality, clubs of teamwork, diamonds of wits, and hearts of betrayal and heartbreak. Depending on which character you have come to favor, seeing the cards will either excite relief or dread in you, as each person has their own weakness, whether it be a lack of physical strength or a hothead that prevents them from thinking clearly in stressful situations. It builds anticipation, leaving the audience on the edge of their seats. The heart cards in particular strike with dread because without a doubt, it will result in tragedy.

With a script full of compelling dialogue, situational irony, and enticing flashbacks, Alice in Borderland is the perfect binge watch. After I pressed play, I lost the will to tear myself from a screen, whether it be my phone or laptop, or television in the common area. I slammed through the series in a matter of hours, refusing to acknowledge the world around me. As the creators intended, I ended the show in a similar fashion to how Arisu started it: completely immersed and undoubtedly addicted to my preferred choice of entertainment.

Why H.E.R’s “Take You There” Will Be Played @ My Wedding

Peaking from the opening of a poorly made living room fort at Disney princess movies, I would always daydream of my future wedding growing up. Who would I marry? What colors would my bouquet be? What talking animal would I have as a sidekick to help me navigate life? A question that didn’t really cross my mind up until the later years of my childhood was what will be my first dance song?  And another is what will be on my “special day” playlist?

While some of those question remain unanswered, I have figured out one  song that makes the cut to be featured on this playlist. That song is none other than “Take You There” by H.E.R.  She is known for her entrancing voice and thought out lyrics. This song features both her amazing song writing skills and her melodically gifted voice. There is no further explanation needed as to why this song and many other by her will be featured on my wedding day/special day playlist.

The Simpsons Cartoon GIF - Find & Share on GIPHY

The songs opens up posing the questions of “Where’d you go? Who you know?” Now, my initial thought when I first heard this song was it’s just another sappy heartbreak song. I’m pleased to say that I was mistaken. As the first verse ends, the pre-chorus hits. Now, this pre-chorus is responsible for me to not second-guess this song as one of many to be featured on my distant future wedding playlist.

“It’s about time for making up
The times you wasn’t with me waking up
Lying if I said I didn’t miss your touch
I need it to, I needed to
Needed to distance myself from you
Oh, just to know you were the truth
So come closer won’t you, won’t you”-H.E.R “Take You There”

Wanting nothing more than to be close with her lover H.E.R uses her skills of writing lyrics to express her yearning in such a loving and not begging way. When I first heard this, I was immediately put in such a calm space. The way that she was able to express her love for this person without blatantly stating it is so impressive. Enough of me gushing over this pre-chorus, lets move into the chorus. 

In Love Hearts GIF by The Valentines - Find & Share on GIPHY

“With you Heaven is a place on Earth and I will take you there” is my favorite line from the entire chorus. From the way she sang it to the way it was written everything is just *chef’s kiss*. To be willing to offer someone something so vast and metaphoric and for a person to make you feel like that, I am here for it.

The song continues to display H.E.R’s love for her person in her expressing of wanting to be close with them for the time made up. Some may interpret this song as two past lovers rekindling, I, however, interpret this as a meeting of soulmates finally.

In short, H.E.R has not only stolen her lovers heart but also mines. #STAN There are multiple reasons why this should be played at every wedding but this short analysis is why it will be played at mine. Down below will be a link to the song. I hope you guys will give it a listen and enjoy it just as much as I do.

Heart Years and Heaven,

Certified Lover Girl <3

 

Heart of the Woods: A Mostly Ghostly Romance

If you’ve talked to me in the past couple weeks, you know I’ve been obsessively talking about and playing one of the latest visual novel releases from Studio Élan, Heart of the Woods. So, what’s a better way of progressing my obsession than reviewing it on my monthly blog assignment?

Heart of the Woods Promotional Image
Heart of the Woods Promotional Image

Heart of the Woods is an LGBTQ+ romance visual novel that tells the story of four young girls meeting in unusual circumstances and fighting against an evil force trying to rip them apart. The main protagonist of this story, Maddie Raines, is the manager of a paranormal web-show hosted by her best friend, Tara Bryck. However, Maddie has bigger plans for her future than running a mildly successful web-show for years about something she doesn’t even believe in for the sake of her best friend.  So, she announces her departure from the show before her last big episode, and Maddie and Tara enter a largely unspoken grudge on the ride to a whole new country. The two instantly strike the player as opposites, and it makes you wonder how they became such close friends in the first place. Maddie is professional, logical, and cold, while Tara, on the other hand, is brash, positive, and energetic.

Maddie and Tara on the way to Eysenfeld
Tara (left) and Maddie (right) on their way to Eysenfeld

The pair arrive in Eysenfeld, a quaint, isolated village in Germany. An eager fan of the show had invited Maddie and Tara out to her small town to investigate paranormal happenings in the woods around Eysenfeld, calling it a “ghost-hunter’s paradise.” This fan, as we’ll soon come to learn, is Morgan Fischer. 

Morgan is, well, different. She’s not interested in antiques, yet runs an antique shop (that no one shops at), claims to own a talking cat, seems to show little to no emotion, and the entire town of Esyenfeld treats her coldly and as if she’s some sort of stain on the town’s reputation. However, she has her quirky charms o her. Tara is quick to dismiss this, but Maddie is wary of her. Maddie instantly regrets coming on the trip. It’s unbearably cold, far away from home, and they’re even staying with who she believes is a lunatic.

If only there was something, or rather someone, who could convince her to stay a little longer…

Abigail reaching out to Maddie.
Abigail reaching out to Maddie.

Fast forward a bit, and you’ll soon meet Abigail, the ghost of a young woman trapped in the heart of the woods, as you may say. Maddie encounters her in the forest of Esyenfeld one day while trying to clear her head, and the pair quickly become close friends. Abigail had not spoken to another person in over one hundred years, so Maddie is wonderful company to her. Even after all that time, she is still mostly herself—meek, kind, and playful. Maddie is unable to hear or touch Abigail, but Abigail can understand her. Maddie finds out her name by bringing a book of baby names and reading them out one by one until the ghost girl confirms: Abigail. Maddie continues to read to her at an abandoned church every day, and the pair grows closer each visit. The two agree to keep Abigail’s existence a secret from everyone.

Abigail pointing out her name in the book.
Abigail pointing out her name in the book.

So, now that you know the basics of the game and its characters, let’s move on to the review!

Overall, I enjoyed Heart of the Woods a lot! Abigail and Maddie’s romance in particular was really intriguing, and not once was I bored with the story or characters. The game description calls it a “take on a fairy tale,” which is absolutely well executed. The whole story is magical, and the forest makes you feel as if you’re stepping into another world. The descriptive writing is phenomenal, and all the characters are fleshed out and feel like real people. (Except for, in my opinion, the main antagonist, but I’ll get to that later.) The music was also EXCEPTIONAL! I listen to the OST all of the time now, and I cried while listening to the ending song by In Love with a Ghost. (A very fitting guest appearance.) It just felt as if the team truly did put their heart and soul into the project, and I would heavily recommend it to everyone. It’s safe to say I’m super excited for my Maddie x Abigail keychain to arrive. 🙂

The group notices a strange faint light in the sky.
The group notices a strange faint light in the sky.

The pacing of the story starts off pretty slow, but I never saw that as a bad thing. However, the pace very quickly speeds up towards the end, and it felt almost as if the game was trying to shove as much into the last chapter it could. The multiple endings were based on one decision towards the end, and it felt quite forced. Maybe it was just me, but I felt very overwhelmed, and I believe it might have flowed a bit better if it was drawn out just a few thousand words more. Another thing I noticed was the varying quality of the voice acting. Some voices felt much more fitting and experienced, while others felt almost mediocre. However, all the voices were fine, in my opinion, and didn’t take away from my playing experience at all.

Now, my major issue with the story was the main antagonist. I can’t reveal who it is at risk of spoiling the game, but you’ll probably be able to guess. The villain was very one-dimensional, and while the reasoning for their power-hungry and violent character is explained through their “moonsickness” and desire for immortality, the game never really gave them any redeeming qualities or humanity at all. It’s possible this was to parallel old fairy tales, but I’m just the type to enjoy complex antagonists. 

Thanks for tuning in, and I hope you check out my next blog, whatever that may be. I hope you had a good read and that I encouraged you to purchase this wonderful piece of art for yourself!

Maddie and Abigail in front of the forest lake.
Maddie and Abigail in front of the forest lake.

Lord, Oh Lorde Part Deux (2)

Here I am again with the next installment of analyzing the Solar Power album, by Lorde. I hope you’re finding your paths, and if it led you here, well you’re more than welcome to stay. Last week I mentioned how this is going to be my initial listen to the songs, and then I will put in my raw thoughts. Last post’s ending song was California, so we will continue from there. Again, feel free to listen along as you read my personal takes. 

4.  Stoned at the Nail Salon

Lyrics

Got a wishbone dryin’ on the windowsill in my kitchen
Just in case I wake up and realize I’ve chosen wrong
I love this life that I have, the vine hangin’ over the door
And the dog who comes when I call, but I wonder sometimes what I’m missin’
Well, my hot blood’s been burnin’ for so many summers now
It’s time to cool it down, wherever that leads
‘Cause all the beautiful girls, they will fade like the roses
And all the times they will change, it’ll all come around
I don’t know
Maybe I’m just stoned at the nail salon
Maybe I’m just stoned at the nail salon again
Got a memory of waitin’ in your bed wearin’ only my earrings
We’d go dancin’ all over the landmines under our town
But the sun has to rise, when it does, we’ll divide up the papers
Two former hell-raisers, I’m still crazy for you, babe
Well, my hot blood’s been burnin’ for so many summers now
It’s time to cool it down, wherever that leads
‘Cause all the music you loved at sixteen, you’ll grow out of
And all the times they will change, it’ll all come around
I don’t know
Maybe I’m just
Maybe I’m just stoned at the nail salon again
Oh, make it good
Oh, make it good
I’d ride and I’d ride on the carousel
‘Round and ’round forever if I could
But it’s time to cool it down
Whatever that means
Spend all the evenings you can with the people who raised you
‘Cause all the times they will change, it’ll all come around
I don’t know
Maybe I’m just stoned at the nail salon
Maybe I’m just stoned at the nail salon again
 

 
Raw Thoughts:
This one. As I was listening to it on Spotify getting ready to type, I was reading the little quotes from her about the song’s inspiration. Lorde was mentioning there about how this song came to her after the end of a tour. Usually during this time all these grand questions and worries of life begin to come at her. I think it comes across in the song very well.
 
There is still the uncertainty at certain parts when she’ll sing something profound and then follow it with, “I don’t know.” It seems reminiscent of when someone younger, or even a child, wants to express their emotions but isn’t quite sure how their feelings will be taken. This doesn’t lessen the value of the lines in anyway. If anything it adds to the depth of growing up. There are all these ideas of what “grown up” should be. Sometimes disregarding age, we’re just lost and/or confused. I do think this song is about that growing up moment when all the sudden realizations start hitting right in the feels.
 
This one’s deep.
 
5. Fallen Fruit
 
Lyrics
 
 
To the ones who came before us
All the golden ones who were lifted on a wing
We had no idea the dreams we had were far too big
Far too big
And we will walk together
Psychedelic garlands in our hair
Through the halls of splendor where the apple trees all grew
You’ll leave us dancing on the fallen fruit
The fallen fruit
The fallen fruit
The fallen fruit
From the Nissan, to the Phantom, to the plane
We’ll disappear in the cover of the rain
Took the great minds and the vapers
And a pocketful of seed
It’s time for us to leave
And we will walk together
Psychedelic garlands in our hair
But how can I love what I know I am gonna lose?
Don’t make me choose
 

Raw Thoughts:
I read the very little detail from Spotify from Lorde, and she said this song is about the environment and the parent generation. 
 
I love how it begins with how the- I’ll refer to the newest generation as “us” and “our” because I am part of it- anyways, the way it describes our generation’s dreams as too big is great imagery. It could mean our dreams are too big because they expand beyond Earth’s lifetime.
 
( Really though, all the song has great imagery and metaphors for the topic at hand. ) 
 
Along with how she is blaming the past generations by saying how they took advantage of the apple trees, and now we are left “dancing on the fallen fruit.” As in, the trees no longer bare fruit due to the climate problems. It is all very environmental political without being overly rude I think. She is stating the problems and expressing her ideas, but still politely. That may be my own bias talking because I’m not the one being put on the spot in this song, but it’s an amazing message told in amazing chords and melodies.
 
6. Secrets from a Girl (Who’s Seen it All)
 
Lyrics
 
 
Dancing with my girls, only having two drinks then leaving
It’s a funny thing, thought you’d never gain self control
Guess it’s been a while since you last said sorry
Crying in the dark at your best friends’ parties
You’ve had enough, gotta turn the lights up, go home

Couldn’t wait to turn fifteen
Then you blink and it’s been ten years
Growing up a little at a time then all at once
Everybody wants the best for you
But you gotta want it for yourself
My love

You can take ’em if you want ’em, these are just
Secrets from a girl, who’s seen it all
Secrets from a girl, who’s seen it
Secrets from a girl
Secrets from a girl, who’s seen it
Secrets from a girl (Secrets from a girl)
Secrets from a girl, who’s seen it all

‘Member all the hurt you would feel when you weren’t desired?
(Doing anything for more touch)
‘Member what you thought was grief before you got the call?
Baby girl, no one’s gonna feel the pain for you
You’re gonna love again, so just try staying open
And when the time comes, you’ll fall
Yeah, when the time comes, you’ll fall

Your dreams and inner visions, all your mystical ambitions
They won’t let you down
Do your best to trust all the rays of light
Everybody wants the best for you
But you gotta want it for yourself
My love

Couldn’t wait to turn fifteen, then you just go
(Whoosh)
Secrets from a girl, who’s seen it all
Secrets from a girl, who’s seen it
Secrets from a girl
Secrets from a girl, who’s seen it
Secrets from a girl (Secrets from a girl)
Secrets from a girl, who’s seen it all

Welcome to Sadness
The temperature is unbearable until you face it
Thank you for flying with Strange Airlines
I will be your tour guide today
Your emotional baggage can be picked up at Carousel Number 2
Please be careful so that it doesn’t fall onto someone you love
When we’ve reached your final destination, I will leave you to it
You’ll be fine
I’m just gonna show you in, and you can stay as long as you need to get familiar with the feeling
And then when you’re ready, I’ll be outside, and we can go look at the sunrise by euphoria mixed with existential vertigo?
Cool
 

Raw Thoughts: 
Wow. This one hit me a little differently. It is almost hard for me to analyze it because right now I’m so in my head emotionally about what secrets Lorde just let me in on. Although, I think that’s good writing! It’s thought provoking and kept me engaged from the lines.
 
The song does a great job of following the album’s theme of journey and getting older. There are so many shifts of mindsets throughout after she has learned “the secrets.” It’s a lot of meaningful messages too, in my opinion. All the messages are things that seem obvious, but while in a teenage mindset… just aren’t. Although I am not a girl, I still just felt a certain type of way when I heard “the secrets.” 
 
I think this song should be a part of the education system for teens. If this song was heard across the masses then so many heartbreaks might be prevented. We could elevate as a society. Just an idea ♥
 
7. The Man with the Axe
 
 
Lyrics
 
 
If I had to break it down
I’d say it’s the way you love to dance
Moving the furniture when my back is turned
A flick of the lights and the world falls away
And your office job, and your silver hair
But our shapes in the dark are the reason I’ve stayed for all these years
I thought I was a genius
But now I’m twenty two
And it’s starting to feel like all I know how to do is
Put on a suit and take it away
With my fistful of tunes that it’s painful to play
Fingernail worlds, like favorite seashells
They fill up my nights and then they float away
I’ve got hundreds of gowns, I’ve got paintings in frames
And a throat that fills with panic every festival day
Dutifully falling apart for the princess of Norway
But you with your doll’s lashes, your infinite T-shirts
I should’ve known when your favorite record
Was the same as my father’s, you’d take me down
I guess I’ll always be this way
Swallowed up by the words and halfway to space
But there by the fire, you offered your hand
And as I took it, I loved you, the boy with the plan
You felled me clean as a pine
The man with the axe
And the light in his eyes
We’ve been through so many hard times
I’m writing a love song
For you, baby
 

 
Raw Thoughts:
This is definitely the ballad of the album.  My primary thoughts were how this love song correlated with the rest of the album. I suppose this is showing her personal life, so we as an audience understand her own personal growth. I feel like with the other songs we only got glimpses, but in ways that also helped us. This song seems a lot more personalized and specific. 
 
It seems like a mood for love that is young, or at least it still has that giddy feeling of young love. 
 
A metaphor I thought was very clever, “But our shapes in the dark are the reason I’ve stayed for all these years.” She had a way of using the figurative language to tell so much without saying it. I love the illusiveness. It almost in ways keeps the full experience her’s. This song is so revealing yet not at all at the same time. That’s an amazing trait for a piece of writing to have. It’s hard to explain.
 
I really enjoyed this segment of analyzing Lorde’s magnificent new album, Solar Power. Diving in to the journey of listening to an album about a journey is very cool. I feel like as Lorde is revealing, yet more of her life, I’m still growing along with her. It’s so rad. 
 
Well that’s all for this post, but I want you all to keep learning helpful secrets and maybe…don’t eat all the fallen fruit 😉
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

Literature Review – Dirt

‘Dirt’ by the Collection (Official Music Video)

In this song, Dirt by The Collection, multiple biblical figures are named and their stories are hinted at. Well after I heard this song it inspired me to look deeper these people’s stories – and what I found is only the surface. 

Abraham was scared to die, forsook his wife within the lie
Think I know the reasons why; cause he was made of dirt.

These two lines are talking about Abram (whose name was changed to Abraham) when he and his wife doubted that God would fulfill his promise to make their descendants as numerous as the star because of their old age. They decided to make the promise come true themselves in own way (through Sarah’s servant) instead of waiting for God’s timing. Chapters 15 – 18 and 21 in Genesis. 

And Joseph's coat was full of pride, the blood of goats won't wash you white If I was his brother, I'd have lied, and left him in the dirt

These two lines are talking about when Joseph’s brothers (who were jealous that Joseph was spoiled) trapped him in a hole, sold him to slave traders, and convinced their dad that Joseph had been killed by wolves by tearing up Joseph’s special coat and smearing it in goat blood. 

And Moses never entered in to land he thought was promised him
He took his people 'round again, to pick manna from the dirt.

These two lines are hinting at the time that Moses used God’s power without God’s command to do so (he split a rock open and made water come from it) when giving a lesson to the Israelites. They had forgotten what God had saved them from and became ungrateful, so God told them they weren’t allowed to enter the promised land yet and that they had to roam the desert for 40 more years. 

And Solomon became so wise, with many wives and concubines
He fell for every single lie, yeah, his head was full of dirt.

These two lines are talking about how Solomon had many women in his life who did not follow God and how Solomon allowed them to influence him and his way of ruling. Solomon allowed sinful things to happen in his kingdom because of his wives’ influences.  

And David's where I got my name, abusing power, abusing fame,
He stole a girl, her husband slain, left six feet in the dirt.

These lines talk about when King David spied on a woman (while she was bathing) and then about how he used his status as king to send the woman’s husband to get killed in the frontlines of the war they were in. After the woman’s husband was dead, David took her to be his wife. 

And Peter fell to his own shame, denied his love, denied his name, He ran away, when the people came, to nail him to the dirt.

This part of the song is talking about when the Disciple Peter denied that he knew Jesus three times before a roster could crow twice. This was on the morning of Jesus being taken to be crucified, after Peter had been told he would do exactly what is described above – this is also after peter had promised that he wouldn’t deny that he knew Jesus.

And Samson only thought it fair, to let the witch come cut his hair And look through eyes no longer there as he crushed them in the dirt. 

Here the song is describing the moment that Samson told his philistine wife what the source of his incredible strength was. Once he was asleep, his wife cut his hair and the Philistines were able to capture him – the philistines also plucked out Samson’s eyes. Later when the all the philistines had gathered for a celebration (where they had Samson chained to the temple walls, on display for all to see that the philistines had won), Samson asked the severest to place his hands on the temple pillars and he asked God to give him the straight to kill the philistines. Then, with God’s strength, Samson destroyed the temple and killed all the philistines and himself in the rubble. 

And Paul would sit upon his throne and kill us with the biggest stones And wrestle with the thorn unknown, a thorn up from the dirt.

These lines are hinting to the apostle Paul, who watched the false prophet Stephen get stoned to death, right before Paul started traveling to spread God’s message. Paul taught mostly to the Romans and the other people who lived there, and he was basically the spiritual leader for that time, era, and place. 

But if the nations had a father, Joseph would redeem his brothers. Moses held the waters up, and David would become your love. Solomon would build the temple, Samson came to destroy evil, Peter soon became the rock and Paul would lead the roman flock

The next couple lines of lyrics can be stated as this: Abraham became the Father of Nations , Joseph forgave his brothers, Moses held up the waters, Solomon built the temple, David was still beloved, Peter became a strong foundation, Samson destroyed the Philistines, and Paul taught in front of Romans. 

And it's all that I can do to keep my eyes off You,
And it's all that You can do to keep me, keep me, keep me ne

All that I can see is that You can't see the dirt in me
All that I can see is that You can't see the dirt in me
All that I can see is that You can't see the dirt in me
And all that I can see is You.

And with these last repeating lines of the song, I will tell you this: even after all that these men did and after all that happened to them, God still kept his promises. God still delivered them. Doesn’t matter what people do, act, say, believe, God can use people for his glory. Even if they don’t know that he used them. God uses messed up and broken people to do his good works. Doesn’t matter what we think. God is sovereign. 

Hercules by Livingston Review

Today I will be reviewing the song ‘Hercules’ by Livingston.

 

https://youtu.be/l7IjITknG6k

 

Hercules, also known as Heracles or Herakles, is a hero of Greek and Roman Mythology.  He was a demi-god, born from Zeus and a human mother, Alcmene.  Zeus disguised himself as Alcmene’s lover, and slept with her, thus making Hercules.  Hercules was born with inhuman strength, thus forming the preface of the song.

 

While we’re here / Give me something that I’ll never forget / We would fly / Through the years / As if they never would end / Jumping over the fence / Before we knew where to stop.  Livingston sings of being in love, and how it can make time pass quickly and make you do rash things.  While we’re here / Tell me something that you’ll never regret / Your words went over my head / But they remind me of then / Jumping over the fence / Before we knew where to stop.  The song continues about love and sharing secrets.  

 

Now I’m alive, but I’m lonely / I’m not the child that you showed me to be / I’m terrified ’cause you know me / Better than I know myself.  Livingston is saying how love has shown him a lot of things about himself, and that he is afraid to lose it.  Love often brings out the best parts of us, so much so that you do not feel like yourself without your partner.  Ships in the night / When I found you / Now it’s city lights / Where I’m finding myself /Send me a sign, and I’ll come back / Give me a chance to bleed / I can’t be Hercules.  Comparison between when they first met and now.  Livingston is using Hercules as a symbol of pure strength, saying he is not Hercules is showing how he is simply a human and cannot be strong all the time; he needs time to heal from things.  Nowhere to hide / Or to turn to / I’m trying to find / What you see in myself / Send me a sign, and I’ll come back / Give me a chance to bleed / I can’t be Hercules.  He has no one to help him with this issue and he is trying to figure out what his love saw in him.  He wants her back and is willing to come back if she wants.  Now I’m gone / Sold my heart to still not know what I’m worth / New York sees through my facade / She knows that you loved me first / No, I could never pretend / As if I knew where to start.  He has trouble understanding his value, and has put on a type of fake personality that can be seen through.  

 

After a repeat of the chorus, we have a bridge off: What is the point of changing / If I only lose the one I love? / I counted my stars to make it / But I couldn’t become more than who I was.  In the myths of Hercules, he is struck by a curse of madness and kills his wife; I believe this is what it is referring to.  However it is also metaphorical for how he also lost his love.  After this the chorus repeats one more time for lasting effect.