see because this isn’t what we finna do

When I think of my future I can’t see myself living how anyone I know does. I use to think this mindset was silly, but it will be my reality. I hate routine. I hate patterns. I hate waking up and seeing the same thing, driving the same route to school, listening to the same conversations, and seeing the same faces.

I refuse to accept that life was meant to be lived by going to a school created through a rigged system for 12 (+) years, and going into a career directly after. A career that I most likely will complain about every second that I’m not asleep because I’d be completely exhausted. I want to be exhausted from turning down roads I’ve never seen, and hiking on hills I’ve never climbed. I want to learn from experience, and conversations with guys with long hair who’s face is scarred by the sun.

Sitting in a desk for eight hours a day isn’t learning. It’s conditioning you for a life that a system expects you to have. Working the average 9-5 job, having a family of four, and occasionally going on vacation just seems boring and a waste of time.  When I graduate I’m gone.

I’m going to buy a cute van, make it livable, dot some cute stickers on the outside of it and I’m out. I have no idea how I’m going to make money for gas. Maybe I’ll start a twitter business where I see wired rings that I’ll make while I watch the sun rise in a different place every morning.

I want to go to California first. My sister has been and tells stories of a town outside of San Francisco with painted sidewalks and shops full of crystals. Then I want to go to Colorado to see the mountains and act like I’m in a Christmas movie. Wherever the wheel takes me is where I will go.

I hope some friends of mine will come along. I don’t want to watch anyone I care about live a life that their parents, or government expects them to have. It would break my heart. It breaks my heart to see my mom stressed over her job. It literally does not matter. We are flying through space on a rock. Nothing matters.

I’ll eventually settle down though. Hopefully in Greece where my only type of transportation is a little pink scooter with hello kitty stickers on the side. I’ll live a good life with no grandkids to tell stories to when I’m reminiscing so I’ll most likely make a blog post about it.

I can’t wait to beat the odds. I don’t want to feel trapped and look back on my life as I’m older and regret it. I will be free. I wish time stopped and I was a kid forever, but it doesn’t so I’ll make the world my playground.