what is love?

Hey guys, today I want to talk about something that has confused my brain for some time now. If you thought this was Haddaway’s “What is love?” I hate to disappoint. So keep on reading if you’re as puzzled as me.

You’ve seen those teenagers/kids that carelessly throw around the word love right? It goes something like this:

(2 weeks in a relationship): I love you, teehee. (okay it doesn’t go exactly like that, but you get the point).

I’ve even seen adults who do the same thing. It puts a bad taste in my mouth. I, for one, do not try to carelessly use such powerful words. It seems like “I love you’s”  have been simplified to this false sense of comfort people get when it is said to them. By the way, after a while it gets old if there was no substance to their words. When you hear those words, but don’t see the actions that are supposed to come with it, is it really love people?

Okay, maybe I’m getting ahead of myself. Some people don’t even know what love is. I’ve asked people before, and have got responses like, “Wow, that’s a deep question.” It seems so simple, but it’s really not. I mean, think about it. These characters representing sounds in speech come together to make some type of meaning created by someone’s feelings in the past. Someone thought the feeling in their heart was so important, that they had to do something to make the other person understand- now that sounds like love to me (it also sounds a bit cheesy, but…)

I personally, have been in love romantically before. I remember wanting them to be happy. I just wanted them to feel like they meant everything to me. Their losses were my losses, their wins were my wins. We struggled together, came out of our hard times together, and were each others support. Their needs came over my needs, and I remember crying many nights for their good. That they would see a purpose in life- I rooted for them. Even though we are not together anymore, I still wish the utmost best to them. 

So yes, I do believe I understand what love is, but perhaps this will help you understand:

“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps not record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away”(1 Corinthians 13:4-8)

I found that this was a great example. Scientifically speaking, I found some great examples for keeping long term love:

1. They maintain a sense of “love blindness.”
2. They’re always trying new things together.
3. They avoid neediness by preserving their independence.
4. Their passion for life carries over into their relationship.
5. They see their relationship as a journey together towards self-fulfillment. 

Here’s the link to the article: https://www.huffpost.com/entry/psychology-of-lasting-love_n_5339457?guccounter=1&guce_referrer=aHR0cHM6Ly93d3cuZ29vZ2xlLmNvbS8&guce_referrer_sig=AQAAAEUr8YxKOtsh0fh4xAYnPaIoPtXVRqUoxyKPM9l1-U_dKP1YFIT29GzlU9lVf__L5Xa2jG8v9EZPrPpbox5ET9mEBG4lL3ggF97h4SlPJvpZ-fPbDnrgqDAKSbsWRCDKbYCAKbeCy33Ks6mf94kmdr2Dn2WOaSr1Nh24wict0D7V

I hope those reading have discovered something from this, even I have. Maybe now, you see love as a more permanent thing. Love isn’t easy, and takes work, but it is worth it.  

Author: Maple

Maple(hold the syrup) is a wild creature from beyond. He likes connecting with others, and having philosophical conversations, while also laughing a ton. He adores nature in general, and cannot breathe if he's not in it once a day. He dreams of owning a plant shop with a corgi, and a brewery on the side. He also wants to major in psychology, and, of course, write. View all posts by Maple