Recently, I journeyed to the Lincoln County public library for the first time. I went in not expecting to find anything, but I did: Tess Holliday’s memoir, The Not So Subtle Art of Being a Fat Girl. Although I haven’t completely finished the book, I have enjoyed every page I’ve read had so far. Holliday’s journey of being a single teen mom, living in the South, being fat, and trying to be a model is a story like no other. It’s a story that, I think, people from all walks of life can relate to in some way. For me, it really hits home because Holliday grew up in south Mississippi, not too far from where I’m from. The fact that she went from being a single mom in a dingy town in Mississippi to a well-known plus-size supermodel, seemingly overnight is inspiring. Holliday has defied all the odds, and she’s a role model for so many. I’ve only read the first five chapters, but all of them have been so good. Holliday mostly discusses her hometown life in Mississippi in the first few chapters, but in later chapters, she delves into how she got into modeling, raising her son, and managing the industry.
Overall, the book is personal and captivating. Holliday is one of the women who inspires me to live my truth, be myself, and that I can do anything, no matter where I come from. She made it out, as a fat woman, from the same simple-minded place that I grew up, so I know I can do anything I put my mind to because she did. That’s my biggest takeaway from this book.
Rate: 10/10; it’s an awe-inspiring story of a woman just living her life, and there’s so much truth, vulnerability, and beauty in this book. If you’re looking for a new read, I totally recommend this one!
In my journey of searching for a poem for Poetry Out Loud, I came across this poem by poet Linda Pastan (pronounced Past-An):
I Am Learning to Abandon the World
BY LINDA PASTAN
I am learning to abandon the world
before it can abandon me.
Already I have given up the moon
and snow, closing my shades
against the claims of white.
And the world has taken
my father, my friends.
I have given up melodic lines of hills,
moving to a flat, tuneless landscape.
And every night I give my body up
limb by limb, working upwards
across bone, towards the heart.
But morning comes with small
reprieves of coffee and birdsong.
A tree outside the window
which was simply shadow moments ago
takes back its branches twig
by leafy twig.
And as I take my body back
the sun lays its warm muzzle on my lap
as if to make amends.
My general thoughts on this poem, when I first read it, primarily centered on the language used in the poem. Never had I ever read such modern, poetic lines such as these. One line that stuck with me the most was “And as I take my body back[,] the sun lays its warm muzzle on my lap as if to make amends.” The line is very simple, but it says so much. Using the word “muzzle” rings comfort and describes the warmth of the sun in such a beautiful way. The whole poem had great wording, it was very cohesive and coherent, and the structure was visually pleasing. This poem, without a doubt, is one of my favorites…
but it isn’t the poem that stands out to me the most…it is the story behind it.
Linda Pastan wrote this poem with the story of grief and acceptance in mind. A woman, who is on the verge of leaving this world, goes through the “wrong” in her life, but finds things to keep her going every day. The clear shift in tone of the poem allows the reader to clearly see where the thought process of this woman is.
The first line sets the story up to be one of hopelessness and gives a “just-gave-up” tone. “I am learning to abandon the world before it can abandon me.” In other words, she is learning to not enjoy life, so it won’t hurt as much when life leaves her. Though a very sad thought process, the rawness in it is what makes it so powerful. The speaker has lost all faith in the world as the world has let her down before.
The story then leads to an explanation of what she has given up; she has given up on the sight of the milky moon, the beautiful sight of falling snow, and she has even given up all things musical and lively in her life. With a realization that the world has taken her father and her friends, the unsaid question stands to be, “what more is there for her to live for?”
The story then moves to a brighter tone as the speaker stops herself from going deep into what she doesn’t have or what she has to go through and moves to the better things in her life. She recalls the smell of coffee in the morning, the singing birds of the day, the lively tree that lives outside her window, and the warmth the sun provides in times of comfort. This shift in the story brings a sense of hope and gives the audience hope that the speaker will turn out okay in the end. If not okay, atleast content.
This poem lives in my head rent FREE and I hope it will impact you in someway as it did to me. Happy reading!
Hello to those who actually decided they care enough to read about my opinions lol. This is another segment of “Stephyne tries to review art by prestigious writers which she one day hopes to be on their level” or as I like to call it, my monthly literary review!
If you have never heard of the name, August Wilson, be prepared to be amazed. August Wilson was a playwright who captured the joy and struggles of the African American experience through his art. According to the Huntington Theatre, ” The impact of Wilson’s work has made a lasting mark on American theatre, and opened doors to conversations about the black experience in the United States. Wilson was attracted to the theatre and its potential to reach audiences, no matter the class or race.” Mr. Wilson has many accolades including a Tony award for his play Fences and and two Pulitzer Prizes.
The play I will be reviewing is Ma Rainey’s Black Bottom. Ma Rainey was a influential blues singer who is known as the Mother of Blues. Her sound is soulfully, strong, painfully, yet filled with joy.
Mr. Wilson play is a fictional story that surrounds Ma Rainey and her band. The setting is placed in the recording session of her hit song, “Black Bottom”.
I watched the screen adaptation of Ma Rainey’s Black Bottom on Netflix. The film starred talented and well known stars such as Viola Davis, Chadwick Bozeman, Gylnn Turman, and Coloman Domingo. The movie was filled with black comedy, black joy, black talent, black dreams, and finally black pain.
I inspire to write about the black experience vulnerable as August Wilson did. He is the an example of a true artist capturing the art of human interaction. I recommend his plays and movies to anyone. Not only those apart of the black diaspora even though we will identify with it more. I also recommend this to any young writer who is in desperate need of motivation to create truth. August Wilson is the perfect writer and I can only hope I walk through the doors he has opened for any black playwright.
I could count how many times I have read a poem that I truly relate to on one hand. Seldom do I connect with poetry on a level of familiarity, but this particular poem immediately resonated with me. For my entire life, I have been singled out, picked on, praised, and even questioned about my most unique feature: my gap. After losing my two front teeth as a child, I was sure that they would grow back in the same way as they were prior to me losing them; I was wrong.
My teeth came back with a space that would be with me forever. The idea of getting rid of my gap bothers me and even brings me to the brink of dissapointment. Why would I get rid of something so beautiful?
Jacqueline Woodson was a poet I came across during my search for a poem for Poetry Out Loud. Once I found her poem Genetics I was immediately intrigued. I had never seen a poem with such a title; a simple word with such a heavy meaning.
Upon reading the poem, my first thought was, “Wow. This is literally my life.” The parallels within the poem matched perfectly with my life. Like the speaker in the poem, I, too, have a family gene of the famous gap. No matter how big or small it is, every member of my family has a gap. The most prominent carriers of the gene happen to be me and my siblings. My brother and sister don’t have a large gap like me, but theirs surely isn’t in hiding.
Our infamous gap is behind the various questions of “Are you guys related?” or, my personal favorite when it is just my sister and I, “Are you two twins or sisters?” These questions never fail to bring a smile to our faces as we know how distinct that feature is and how personal it is to us.
For Jacqueline Woodson to bring that same smile to my face as I read her poem, I thank her. Her simple words and short lines told a story that I knew well. It tells a story that I dream of being able to tell someone one day. It was almost like I could envision myself saying the poem to a stranger who asked me about my gap or to someone who doubted my relation to my brother or sister. I could see myself as the speaker.
Strictly praising the content of the poem, I also want to give praise to the simplistic structure of the poem. I am a strong believer in shorter poems holding more weight. The words are carefully picked and placed together strategically. With longer poems, I feel, you have more room to throw in “filler” words, creating a disconnect between the reader and the poem.
Jacqueline Woodson worded this poem perfectly, not wasting time on descriptions, but rather being completely present in that moment. The structure of the poem was an interesting aspect. I don’t dwell too much on poem structures considering the possibilities are endless for how a poem can look. Personally, I like to see the various ways a poem can be structured, I even practice changing the structure of my own poems from time to time. The overall poem had great pacing, strong word choice, and also has a very welcoming and relatable tone to it.
I love this poem and I think you all will too! Check it out and let me know what you think!
Recently, a man was shot while walking pop star, Lady Gaga’s dogs, Koji and Gustav. The man has since been identified as Ryan Fischer, who has often been seen with Gaga’s dogs in the past. Reports say that while Fischer was unconscious at the scene, he is now out of surgery and in stable condition. Fischer put up a fight when the unidentified men attacked him while walking the dogs, and many believe that’s why he was shot. However, Fischer’s efforts were not in vain, as one of Gaga’s three beloved French bulldogs, Miss Asia, was able to escape.
Police are still unsure of the motive behind this attack. However, all signs point to a targeted attack, but the reason still remains unclear. Were the dogs stolen because they belong to the pop princess or simply because French bulldogs are high-priced canines? The West Hollywood police department is continuing to try and answer that question. In the meantime, Gaga has yet to make an official statement, as she is out of the country shooting a film in Rome. However, sources close to the star have said that she is devastated and is offering $500,000 for the safe return of her dogs, “no questions asked”. This now raises questions that the robbery was purely for ransom. If so, Gaga has taken the bait to ensure the safety of her beloved Koji and Gustav.
Nonetheless, I can’t help but think of how ridiculous this all seems. Gaga is willing to pay half-a-million dollars to get her animals back, but seems to have no sympathy for Fischer, whose life was on the line. Doesn’t he deserve justice? I’m an animal-lover too, and while her dogs may be like family, how are we to ignore the fact that a man was shot? Witness, Buck Angel, says, “Someone actually got shot over dogs… Are we gonna start taking people’s dogs for ransom now? It’s horrible.”
Angel is right; is this the new normal? Will criminals start coming out of the woodworks to steal celebrity animals for a payday? Is man’s best friend really worth all of this?
I have always found the synthesizer-driven band Depeche Mode fascinating. When I was much younger, I pronounced Depeche (“depesh”) like “depeechee”, and every time “People Are People” filled my ears with clanging metal, dance-inspiring synth beats, and catchy lyrics, I would lose my cool. I took nothing from the lyrics, but the angelic voice singing, “I can’t understand what makes a man hate another man,” against a backdrop of punchy electronic rhythm made me want to dance.
Fast forward to today…I am a senior in high school listening to the same classic song. And I still can not get over the bouncy bass synths, explosion of clanging metal, and the unraveling, airy synth that strikes an impression even before the vocals begin.
How did I get here? admiring a strange-sounding song from 1984 to the point that I am writing an obsession-fueled blog post?
To be honest, I ended up with a good bit of my parents’ music taste. It has always appealed to me—the mix of eighties’ and nineties’ hits I would play over and over on my pink portable CD player. I would blast through earbuds “Run Away” by Real McCoy in the car or make up dances in my room to “99 Luftballons” by Nena. I would sing giddily along to “Friday I’m in Love” by the Cure or become entranced by the whining guitar in the Smiths’ song “How Soon is Now?” I soon abandoned the CD player and fell into other genres and aesthetics, but years later, I ended right back where I started. And that is the power of the eighties, hah!
I was a tenth grader in two back-to-back online classes with access to Youtube. I was peeling oranges and stalking Mississippi School of the Arts’ website and feeling stuck in my present reality. My prime form of escapism? Music. I had my earbuds in the second the bell rang for first block all the way until lunch…almost four hours later. After twenty hours a week of listening to your same favorite genres, you grow desperate. Therefore, I thought, hey! I need to look up some songs from my childhood! Oh, Callie…why? Your addiction is so bad you want to be more of a music nerd than that old guy on Youtube who bought Alan Wilder’s Jupiter 8. Who is Alan Wilder? I will get to that later!
But, yes, what happened? My mind exploded.
I first listened to a basic radio station called EIGHTIES’ HITS! or something generic. And oh, jeez, I was hooked. My brain looked like this: “Oh my goodness, a band called the Cutting Crew sings the song that goes, ‘I just diiiieeeed in your arms tonighhhht,’ it all makes sense!”. After discovering I was a fan of INXS and Simple Minds, I decided to try something out called…dun dun dun: new wave. So I listened to a new wave radio station on Google Music (which later kicked me out because I would skip way too much). WOW! I began connecting familiar songs to band names and album covers, and to me, “the dots” were all connected. What next? Youtube.
I nearly fell out of my chair discovering the British show Top of the Pops. I nearly fell out of my chair watching the music video for “Take on Me” by a-ha for the first time. I also put the magical, awe-inspiring music of Tears for Fears to names and faces. Oh, boy, was it a trip to watch the “Shout” music video for the first time! I developed a very healthy obsession after watching Roland and Curt with mullets and trench coats singing dramatically on a beach. Suddenly I found my thing—something that interested me beyond belief, something I absolutely had to research and learn everything about.
Almost three years later, I own a synthesizer and like to pretend I am in a new wave band in the eighties. R.I.P.
Even though this is so laughable (I have a jolly good time laughing at myself, but it is simply so fun!), music means everything to me. I never have time to play my synthesizer, but when I do my eyes will not leave it for hours. There is something so alluring about synthesizers and new wave to me. It is my favorite genre of all time, and in a way, it is everything that I am. From the “stay weird”, jittery dancing of Dave Byrd (of the Talking Heads) to Mike Score’s (of A Flock of Seagulls) strange hair-do and sci-fi persona, I see myself. And I see myself in the whirs and clicks of Gary Numan’s cold synthesizers, and I see myself in the Cure’s rich blend of impeccable sound. New wave is full of melancholy, madness, and intention created by some pretty darn intelligent artists battling pessimism or transforming it into art. Inspired by the blatant “I don’t care” attitude of punk and England’s grey skies, new wave has inspired nearly every aspect of my life. It is an addiction, I tell ya…
Where does Depeche Mode fit into all of this?
In 2018, I typed “People Are People” into the Youtube search engine and found this:
So this was “Depeechee” Mode…interesting. Immediately, I was filled with a hundred questions all vying for my attention. What was going on? Who exactly were these people? What did the lyrics mean? And, most importantly, was that a battleship? I was intrigued by the cool lead singer who wore all black and possibly eyeliner. And I loved his funky dance moves, haha! I could not make out much of the other band members other than the second main singer—the curly blond one wearing a lot of eyeshadow and leather. Although I was not aware of it at the time, I was hooked.
I have undergone numerous Depeche Mode phases since then—which basically consist of me listening to nothing but DM, wanting to wear my leather jacket with everything, and doing a concerning amount of research and video-mining. Surprise! I am in a mega Depeche Mode phase right now, so step aside, Cure!
Therefore, I present to you the extensive product of my infatuation: a blog discussing the addictive but stellar nature of Depeche Mode and the band’s insane influence on its very, very, very devoted fans.
Depeche Mode, if you are reading this, go on tour…I am begging you.
Depeche Mode
Some brief history:
formed in Basildon in 1980
OG member Vince Clarke said “peace out” after the first album dropped and went on to form Yaz and Erasure
Alan Wilder joined in 1982 after lying about his age and acing the audition
Depeche Mode started wearing leather jackets
Boom…fourteen studio albums and worldwide success
WHo the heck are these people?
Dave Gahan
The man, the myth, the legend…lead singer of Depeche! (also, “the attitude”)
Martin L. Gore
A literal icon…synth and guitar player…vocalist (and “the brains” behind Depeche’s lyrics)!:
Alan Wilder
Synth legend and extraordinaire…occasional drummer (“the genius” and “the secret mastermind” behind the majority of DM hits)!:
Andrew Fletcher
…he plays the synth pretty darn well, is a tall English lad, and can be mistaken as DM’s accountant (“the consistency”)!:
*note: everyone in Depeche kind of does their own thing—from playing tambourine to shopping cart sides—so take these roles with a grain of salt*
…Depeche Mode!
They have gone through so many stages as a band; it is absolutely wild.
Stage One: Vince Clarke era
album one released in 1981: Speak and Spell
I bet $100 that the band can not recall this era without cringing
They look so uncomfortable—to the point I must laugh. Vince is the scraggly lad that is slightly separate from the others, almost appearing edited in.
The only Depeche Mode music video Vince Clarke made an appearance in despite forming the band:
The first time I saw this, I was taken aback. Although this is a fun, bubble-gum synth pop performance that fits the song, it is obvious that they are trying too hard.
Surprise…Vince Clarke leaves the band…something to do with finding the interviews and prospect of touring busy and annoying. Dave Gahan says Vince was actually bored and itching to seek out more successful projects.
Stage Two: Alan Wilder Joins
1981
The band put out an ad in a magazine asking for a new member under the age of twenty-one. After lying that he was not twenty-two, Alan Wilder aced the audition and joined the band.
A classically trained musician, Alan became the Music Director of the band and was responsible for its sound. (Bolded because this is an important note to pay attention to…)
Okay, refresher: (from left-to-right) Andrew “Andy” Fletcher, Dave Gahan, Martin Gore, and…new addition Alan Wilder.
Look how young they were! It makes me laugh because, well, you will see how much they change.
But in my opinion, Alan Wilder fits the band a hundred times better than Vince. This is a rock solid four—they all compliment each other.
One of the first Depeche Mode videos I watched (surprisingly, I viewed this live version of “Just Can’t Get Enough” before the official music video):
I can never watch this without smiling. Although Vince—who was the major songwriter—is not present, this version to me feels more authentic and better fits the song. And it is live! I love Depeche Mode because they are natural performers. This is super light-hearted and infectiously giddy. Andy’s awkward foot-dancing? Yes. Dave’s youthful dancing? Yes. Alan’s fun swagger? Yes. Martin’s good-humored smirk? Yes.
To me, this video represents the new Depeche Mode. And they were not trying to be anyone but a couple of young guys playing synths and enjoying themselves. To me, this is how the band truly began.
Stage Three: Leather Jackets? Yes.
1984
Occurred after the suit-and-tie phase of the following albums: A Broken Frame (1982) (included hits such as “Leave in Silence” and “See You”) and Construction Time Again (1983) (included hits such as “Everything Counts” and “Love, in Itself”)
The albums of this era include the following: Some Great Reward (1984) (“People Are People” and “Blasphemous Rumours”), Black Celebration (1986) (“Black Celebration” and “A Question of Time”), Music for the Masses (1987) (“Never Let Me Down Again” and “Strangelove”), and of course…Violator (1990) (“Enjoy the Silence” and “Personal Jesus”).
The “Golden Era” of Depeche Mode!
This era is my personal favorite. I can not possibly express how much I love every album, every individual detail that amounts to the overall aesthetic. It is literally perfect.
So, what happened to the bow-tie-wearing, basically British boy band from before? Well…Vince Clarke founded Depeche Mode in two instances: the moment he created it and the moment he left.
Depeche started with Vince and Andy playing guitars inspired by the Cure’s 1979 album Three Imaginary Boys. And they only fell in love with synthesizers because of Andy’s friend Martin, who owned a synth cheaper than a guitar amp. Vince was a founding member. He brought the band together, and they played for years in random locations—sporting the name Depeche Mode, something Dave Gahan had spotted in a clothing magazine during his time studying fashion in college. Depeche’s 1981 album Speak and Spell is irreplaceable, fun, and genius. “New Life” is a stellar opening number filled with bubbly sequencers and early 80’s synth pop fun. I love “Just Can’t Get Enough” so much that I learned the riff on my own synthesizer. But Speak and Spell was Vince Clarke.
Vince was the main producer, the leader. He wrote the lyrics, the music—everything. And if he would have continued with Depeche Mode, the band as we knew it would not have existed…no “Personal Jesus”, “Strangelove”, “People Are People”…nothing. And I feel like Vince would have left anyway. He was not destined to carry on with the guys from Basildon; therefore, I feel he saved Depeche by leaving, in a way. And he produced some memorable hits with Yaz and formed Erasure, a perfect musical duo that has lasted for years. By leaving, Vince created Depeche Mode as we knew it. Thanks, Vince Clarke!
When Vince left, Martin took up songwriting and Alan joined. And Depeche flourished.
In 1984, three years and two albums after Vince departed, the band released an album entitled Some Great Reward. In my opinion, with this album, Depeche Mode truly grew into the icons that they are. Alan introduced EM-U Emulators I and II. And with these legendary synthesizers, Depeche Mode began sampling sounds like scissors snipping and pots clattering down stairs. Some Great Reward was unlike anything music had seen before. The music is heavy, industrial, metallic. It carries the sound of traditional synth pop presets but blended unrecognizably. It is incredibly rich in texture, tone. And Dave’s voice adds a smooth touch to all the grating metal sound effects. Somehow, the band managed to create something so heavy and steely but packed with such emotion.
For example, here is a track from Some Great Reward. I first encountered “Blasphemous Rumours” on the radio while driving sometime at night. I had never heard anything quite like it before; it was extraordinary. Side note, I had never sat through the entire music video before, so I only now noticed the Yamaha DX7 (?) synth Martin is playing! That is one of the most legendary 80’s synths of all time. Also, I am not going to comment how much Dave looks like Morrissey…
Speak and Spell was fun and bright-sounding but consciously Vince Clarke. Written mainly by Vince, A Broken Frame still carried the same early synth pop melodies. Construction Time Again introduced a more industrial edge. And with Some Great Reward, every trace of Vince Clarke’s electronic optimism had vanished. The band was changing—adopting a darker appearance and focusing heavily on life’s substance. And with their 1986 album Black Celebration, their transition from posh school boys to pensive stars in leather jackets was final.
In my opinion, Black Celebration was Depeche Mode’s first rock-solid, awe-inspiring album. Every song is an individual, but their flow altogether is immaculate. Everything is intentional and ingenious. And the first track, “Black Celebration” is one of the most captivating opening numbers of all time. I can only compare its dynamic, darkly mystifying beginning to the ethereal “Plainsong”, a track that introduces the Cure’s Disintegration. Not only is the song cinematic, but the beat is incredibly catchy and rich variety.
In 1987, Depeche Mode’s six album, Music for the Masses, was released…and what has to be one of my favorite Depeche Mode eras. The album begins with the sonic “Never Let Me Down Again”—a literal masterpiece meant for stadiums packed with thousands. This epic opening of impressive sound leads into an album showcasing the band’s versatility. From the techno ballad “The Things You Said” to the heavy, drum-filled “To Have and to Hold”, Music for the Masses truly displays the sheer ingenuity of the band. My favorite Depeche Mode song ever, “Strangelove”, is featured on this album!
I recently learned the catchy synth riff on my synthesizer, and it is so addictive to play! I love the groove of this song; it is so unique and dance-worthy. I also love the Music for the Masses era because of 101, Depeche’s live album recorded in the Rose Bowl. I personally believe it is one of most stellar live performances of all time. Here is a video of the legendary concert. At 45:44, the band closes with “Never Let Me Down Again”.
Then, in 1990, Depeche Mode dropped one of the most memorable albums of all time: Violator. In a way, this album feels like a second part to Music for the Masses. The band’s most acclaimed songs—”Enjoy the Silence” and “Personal Jesus” are found on this album. I personally view Violator as the peak of Depeche Mode. The dark, sophisticated allure they had been building since 1984 had risen to its highest, most profound degree. This was Depeche Mode in all of its synth-driven, dark wave glory. Although their next album was a massive success, to me Violator will always be Depeche’s magnum opus.
May I present to you “Enjoy the Silence”! Perhaps the band’s most popular piece, this was once a typical ballad written by Martin. But Alan suggested a more electronic, fast tempo approach usually found in dance music (side note: that is Alan at 2:06 playing the synthesizer). Thank you, Alan Wilder, because this song is not only unique but a smashing success! I also learned it on my synth, and it is absolutely beautiful!
So this is Depeche Mode
This is only part of Depeche’s journey as a band. But these were my favorite years: the awkwardness of finding fame at a young age and losing their frontman, the shift between bow ties and leather jackets, the manifestation of a sound unlike any other. This group of four—Dave Gahan, Martin L. Gore, Andy Fletcher, and Alan Wilder—were unstoppable. But dark days lay ahead. Everything changed after Violator.
I have always loved Depeche Mode. But recently, I have sort of fallen in love with the band. They are beyond talented, and it is no surprise that their fans are known as Devotees (after their upcoming album Songs of Faith and Devotion and its Devotional tour). There is no mistaking the soul connection fans have to the band. And I realized this after stumbling upon a documentary entitled Our Hobby is Depeche Mode. Suddenly, my interest in Depeche Mode was rekindled. This blog, and what is to come, is all a result of that documentary; this is my interpretation, my analysis, my perspective.
Stay tuned for more! This is part one of a series based upon the documentary. In this blog, I broke down some of the band’s background. In part two, I will analyze the documentary’s contents in-depth and ponder the reason behind Depeche’s influence. And in part three I will ask, who exactly is Depeche Mode?
Welcome to my blog…where I often overstay my welcome writing music reviews. In this blog post, I will dissect a handful of songs I tend to obsess over. Enjoy!
“Just Like Heaven” – The Cure
Note: the sound quality is slightly diminished in this video, but everyone likes a music video, right? Enjoy these strangely brilliant people with their funky hair.
Initial Impressions
In May of 1987, the Cure released a studio album titled Kiss Me, Kiss Me, Kiss Me. Although this album boasted memorable, catchy hits such as “Why Can’t I Be You”, the eighth track—”Just Like Heaven”—became a smashing success and a Cure classic…and my favorite song by the Cure, ever. Now, I listen to a lot of the Cure. I love Faith with its ethereal, gloomy works such as “The Funeral Party” and “All Cats Are Grey”. I wrote a three-part blog analyzing all of Disintegration. And I am no stranger to a few underrated B-sides: “To the Sky”, “Halo”, and “This Twilight Garden” to name a few. But my favorite Cure song of all time is perhaps one of their most popular pieces.
Why? Well, it feels me with such indescribable joy. When the drums first kick in, I immediately want to get up and dance. And not to mention “Just Like Heaven” is a pop masterpiece written by anti-pop Robert Smith who loves to sporadically confuse critiques and fans; although the Cure is associated with eighties’ gothic culture, the band will write a lovesick, perfect pop song for kicks. But, yes, this a layered masterpiece that makes my heart spill! The song begins with a catchy drum beat and bass, then a low guitar and another low guitar, and then…an absolutely iconic synth riff…before one of the most delectable electric guitars still the spotlight. And Robert Smith’s voice is as smooth as raspberry sorbet and twice as sweet.
Overall, I can never be mad whilst listening to “Just Like Heaven”. It is one of the impeccable songs in existence, and I can not help but smile and dance a little, feeling energetic. It is definitely one of my comfort songs. I absolutely can not get over the electric guitar and synth riff. This song, to me, is like the auditory equivalent of watching a sunrise, eating an orange, or smelling tangy sherbet. Ah!
Lyrics
“Just Like Heaven”
“Show me, show me, show me how you do that trick The one that makes me scream,” she said “The one that makes me laugh,” she said And threw her arms around my neck “Show me how you do it, And I promise you, I promise that I’ll run away with you, I’ll run away with you.”
Spinning on that dizzy edge I kissed her face and kissed her head And dreamed of all the different ways I had to make her glow “Why are you so far away?” she said, “Why won’t you ever know That I’m in love with you, That I’m in love with you.”
You Soft and only You Lost and lonely You Strange as angels Dancing in the deepest oceans Twisting in the water You’re just like a dream You’re just like a dream
Daylight licked me into shape I must have been asleep for days And moving lips to breathe her name I opened up my eyes And found myself alone alone Alone above a raging sea That stole the only girl I loved And drowned her deep inside of me
You Soft and only You Lost and lonely You Just like heaven
This song’s lyrics are utterly delectable. Robert’s Smith’s words are as sugary sweet as strawberry cheesecake. “Just Like Heaven” is one of the Cure’s upbeat love songs, and although it is quite simple—lacking any ulterior motive or dense metaphor—it is literal perfection.
Robert’s voice is impeccable, his tone changing to match each word intuitively. And listeners are immediately hooked after “show me, show me, show me…” Not only is the first stanza eye-catching, as it is quite dialogue-driven and fun, but the entire plot of “Just Like Heaven” is as immersive at is catchy. With lines such as “spinning on that dizzy edge” and “dancing in the deepest oceans, twisting in the water” Smith evokes this lovesick, giddy feeling in listeners.
But the lyrics take a mysterious and slightly ominous turn. The protagonist in the song wakes up alone on a cliff by the sea: “…alone above a raging sea that stole the only girl I loved and drowned her deep inside of me.” I am infatuated with this line and its strange, significant meaning. What does it mean to have someone drowned deep inside of you? Suddenly, the story of “Just Like Heaven” has taken upon itself a negative connotation, but it is not necessarily sinister. This sudden shift is nearly imperceptible, as the musical tone appears unchanged. But “Just Like Heaven” is no ordinary love song despite its seemingly simple make up.
Overall, I absolutely love the lyrics. With lines such as “daylight licked me into shape” and “you’re just like a dream” and “I’ll run away with you”, Smith makes me want to write a strange love poem. I love everything about the lyrics: the word choice, hazy story, and myriad of feelings it sparks.
Overall
I feel so weightless listening to this; I want to spin in circles until my eyes swim with my surroundings and I am dizzy. I love the punching drums joined by the grounding, groovy bass. I love the piano trills, grand synth chords, and, above all else, that iconic electric guitar. And Smith’s voice is so fitting, so immaculate. Therefore, I am wholly in love with this ethereal piece, “Just Like Heaven”, and the feeling remains long after all the instruments and lyrics end with Smith’s, “just like heaven.” I mean, comparing someone to heaven? Wow!
“Big Sleep” – Simple Minds
Note: Once again I am using a video of low quality. But this is such a captivating live performance! I wish I was there back in 1983, alas…Although the singer is not dancing crazily, his careful, fluid movement across the stage is memorable. And let us take a second to appreciate the synth player…he is all alone playing that same riff over and over while managing a wall of synthesizers.
Initial Impressions
In 1982, Simple Minds released New Gold Dream—arguably one of their best albums. Although I enjoy the majority of the album’s content, I was absolutely enamored by “Big Sleep” ever since it first met my ears. The methodical, repeating synth riff immediately arrested my attention, and my jaw dropped as the song progressed. “Big Sleep” is something to listen to with your eyes closed: your mind able to fully process the song and all of its fascinating pieces. This is a song to dance to in the rain, a song to walk with beneath the white winter sky, a song to listen to as you drive at night. It is absolutely hypnotic…everything about it: the poignant synth riff, the ti-ti-tipping drums, the whining guitar, the unfettered bass, and the smooth vocals. Ugh, what an epic song! I love “Big Sleep” with all of my heart, and I can listen to it on loop for hours. Every delicious piece of it is something to savor carefully and with your full attention. Oh, and yeah…I love this song so much that I learned the iconic synth riff.
Lyrics
“Big Sleep”
“So where did you go? Where do you go in the Big Sleep Going out in the Deep Sleep Is where you’re wandering now So where did you go When you’re in the Big Sleep Drifting in wildlife And still you’re wandering now
We were on the top and the world was spinning We were only young in the whirlpool of warning Communication lost in the thundering rain style A shelter from the storm in the early beginning Going out in the Big Sleep, out in the Big Sleep Could have been years, you know it could have been years Or only seconds ago
Big Sleep, Deep Sleep
Where are you now? Now that you’re up in Big Sleep Valuable friend They saw you leaving this way
We were on the top and the world was spinning We were only young in the whirlpool of warning Communication lost in the thundering rain style A shelter from the storm in the early beginning Where did you go? Immaculate friend For a lifetime I’m grateful And it’s only seconds away
Big Sleep, Deep Sleep
For evermore If only you could see me If only you could see me If only you could see Forever Coming home in the Big Sleep Coming home”
Wow. The lyrics are indecipherable to me, but I am definitely amazed by the meticulous and inventive wording. After reading through the song, my guess is that Big Sleep is a substitute phrase for the word death. This song reads a bit melancholic to me in various ways, so I have some belief in my guess.
After the subtle intro, Jim Kerr sings, “So where did you go?” And a burst of emotionally-charged sound follows. I adore the interesting inflection in his voice.
One of my absolute favorite parts is when Kerr sings, “We were on the top, and the world was spinning; we were only young in the whirlpool of warning.” The meaning alludes me, but I interpret this as a glimpse into memories of once lively moments. These couple of lines maintain the melancholic, hazy vibe of the song but contrast the uncertainty and loss of the Big Sleep with youthful, head-spinning triumph.
I am curious about the significance of time:
“could have been years, you know it could have been years…or only seconds ago”
“For a lifetime I’m grateful, and it’s only seconds away”
“for evermore…forever”
My crude analysis: If I settle upon my interpretation that “Big Sleep” is death, perhaps “could have been years” and “only seconds ago” mean you could die years later or only seconds ago. And perhaps Kerr hopes to live a proper lifetime, as death is only seconds away. And when a person dies, their presence becomes forever uncertain and intangible.
All in all, if I were to continue with this theme of death, I could say that Jim Kerr wrote “Big Sleep” after a death of a significant, “immaculate” friend. He is grieving and wondering of the this deceased person’s existence after death, asking, “so where did you go” and “where are you now”. He begins to reflect upon the futility of his own life and the fragility of existence. And he has potent nostalgia for younger, brighter days spent with the deceased person when death felt so far away—”we were only young in the whirlpool of warning.” And although Kerr wishes the person could only see him, he eventually views death as inevitable and makes peace with it at the end: “coming home in the Big Sleep, coming home.”
Overall
Every once in awhile, you stumble across a particular song that lifts you and assuages you like a melodious hug. For me, “Big Sleep” is one such song. Jim Kerr’s voice is hauntingly beautiful, his performance on stage hypnotic, his English accent on point, his lyrics a bit ominous in their mystery. I am in love with the groovy bass and infectiously rhythmic drums and bubbling, whining electric guitars. And I must revere the synth riff as legendary! It adds to hypnotic, thought-evoking nature of a song that is also simultaneously rich in movement. I can listen to “Big Sleep” over and over again and never grow numb to its awesome effect. Thank you, Simple Minds! This is my favorite song you sing…not “Don’t You (Forget About Me)”! This is an absolute masterpiece.
“Souvenir” – Orchestral Manoeuvres in the Dark
Note: What a beautiful three minutes…one of the most subtle yet artistic music videos I have ever encountered. Although it follows band member Andy McCluskey in a cherry red convertible, the scene is captured with reverent lens, every detail savored. I can not express how perfect this music video is; it has made a home within my heart, and I can feel the myriad of meaning behind each detail. Also, it works with the song so magically.
Initial Impressions
This song means so much to me. The intro is soft, comforting but ominous, and reminiscent of a hushed choir of voices. And the synthesizers are sweet and upbeat but filled with longing or loss. And Paul Humphreys’ voice is so light but heavily significant. “Souvenir” was a part of Orchestral Manoeuvres in the Dark’s 1981 album Architecture & Morality. Its early new wave sound is evident, and I am such a fan! I love OMD because of their fantastic usage of synthesizers and drum machines. In some lights, “Souvenir” can be viewed as an imperfect pop song—short, simple, and catchy…but not as catchy as “If You Leave”, the band’s smashing hit song. But in another light, this track is three minutes of sound to dream to, to discover one’s self. It is a reflective piece revealing OMD’s masterful methods of blending sounds, textures, and moods without revealing anything. the subtlety in “Souvenir” is staggering.
Lyrics
“Souvenir”
“It’s my direction, it’s my proposal It’s so hard it’s leading me astray My obsession, it’s my creation You’ll understand it’s not important now
All I need is co-ordination I can’t imagine my destination My intention ask my opinion But no excuse, my feelings still remain
My feelings still remain”
How amazingly vague are these lyrics? They can mean a number of things, and I am quite curious to know the original intent behind them. But I am confident enough to say the lyrics center around obsession. Perhaps this is a quiet voice in an argument. Perhaps it is a private realization. And perhaps the songwriter is professing their love for fast food tacos. Whatever the underlying meaning, “Souvenir” is a masterpiece of subtlety.
Although the lyrics could be discussing a person’s obsession with said fast food tacos, I can easily imagine “Souvenir” being a carefully guarded profession of love. The speaker in this song has developed significant feelings for someone they probably should not have, for the speaker fears this love will be unrequited. Maybe my interpretation is a stretch, but a few other OMD songs have similar themes: “Secret”, for instance, is an admittance of adoration. And some of the lyrics In “Souvenir” support my interpretation as well. The speaker is admitting their feelings because it is becoming an obsession, their direction; it is leading them astray from their preconceived path in life. And the speaker is conflicted because they feel it is solely their creation and their proposal. And although this obsession has become the speaker’s direction in life, they can not possibly imagine their destination. Not completely understanding the intention behind their feelings, they cover it up and deem it unimportant. But their feelings still remain, and all they want, all they need, is reciprocation.
That was a lengthy analysis! But I love it because I gathered all of that from a few vague lines. Again, “Souvenir” could have been written about a concerning love for fast food, but I love the drama of this interpretation. Speaking of, what is the meaning of the title? Anyway, I love these lyrics.
Overall
This song instills so much peace within me. It calms me down, enables me to breathe. And I love to walk with it playing in my earbuds, for it is so deliciously atmospheric. OMD is definitely one of my favorite underrated bands. The melodic synth riffs in this are absolutely stellar, but OMD, of course, is a legendary synth band. I greatly appreciate the balance in this song of soft, whispering voices and bouncy, optimistic keys. Paul’s voice is so ethereal—as is the song itself. “Souvenir” is something to listen to while cloud-watching or writing stressful essays late at night. Thank you, OMD, for creating something so comforting. It perfectly matches a mood I feel sometimes, one I can only describe as taking in a magnificent sky with watering eyes. I love it!
Peace Out
Thanks for reading, and I hope you have a great day! Tune in later for more music content. (:
Now, this will be a literary review, but not exactly like something I’ve done before. Usually, I like to do my reviews on genres within the creative writing world (i.e. short stories, flash fiction, poetry, etc.), but this time I’ve stepped into the world of reading research articles. Yes, it sounds boring, but this particular journal article piqued my interest so much, I simply have to do a review on it. This will be more along the lines of me dissecting the information presented in this particular article that I read, but still a review of the writing style of this piece of writing.
Given the assignment in my new psychology class, we had the opportunity to look through journal articles on things we found interesting in our lesson. Starting with an interest in counseling psychology and all the things related to the specific practice, I looked through maybe 30 journal articles, but to no avail, none that I looked at held any real interesting information. In another attempt, I went for journal articles concerning developmental psychology. This is where I stumbled across this particular article highlighting a psychological study on household chaos. Written by Jennifer A. Emond, this article, entitled, Household chaos: a risk factor for adverse child outcomes gains attention in public health, highlights important information found in a study on the influences that household chaos can have on the development of a child and their physical health as they grow into adolescence. The question must stand, what is household chaos? As the article defined it, it is “characterized by high levels of confusion, disorganization and hurriedness in the home.” This alone had me hooked on the article. Never in my life have I thought of household chaos being a problem. Though my home life is less chaotic now that all the birds have left the nest, as a young child I often remember moments of pure chaos in my house. It definitely makes me wonder if I have been affected by said chaos.
The article goes on to explain the influences that household chaos can take on behavioral, attention, and learning problems in children. The writer utilizes the information in a very effective way to downsize the scientific jargon that was surely present in the original study. The writer provides a clear, structured article that is very easy to follow and uses words that cater to the less informed on the scientific terms and scientific data used regularly in articles like this. I particularly enjoyed this “layman’s” explanation as I am only into my fifth class of psychology.
The overall article was very well written and definitely gives me insight on research and technical writing, a different side of the literary world that I am not so used to seeing…
But to go into my dissecting process, I would love to share that the article highlighted the correlation between household chaos and sleep. Now, I can’t say that my own experience with household chaos directly influences my terrible sleep schedule, but I can come to the conclusion that there might be some connection between the two. I can’t for the life of me tell you how a psychologist might have even considered that your sleeping behaviors could be a result of high levels of household chaos, but they have. This is what further deepens my growing love for psychology; it is literally everywhere! There is a psychology to everything we know. There is a psychology behind sleeping behaviors, communicative disorders, and even the way we walk!
I won’t go on much more considering I’ll probably just keep on talking about the many wonders of the science of psychology and how I am always in awe of the information that comes about from it. Unfortunately, the article was subjected to being in a library with limited access meaning I can’t share it with you all, but I encourage you to look more into this phenomenon and see what other information you can find! Psychology is slowly making its way into my curious heart and I am so excited to see what else I can learn.
Growing up in a rather judgmental community, I heard a common phrase that as the older I got, the more repulsive it became. It would come up in the discussion of how we should strive to be in our life and in this discussion, people would share examples of others who “weren’t living righteously”. The examples would usually consist of the smaller and more relatable things such as people who cuss or vape. It’s the phrase “they’re such an awful person”, or, “I don’t like them; they’re a bad person.” First of all, this says a lot about your character if you base someone off of a life choice they make that you disagree with. Second of all, who are you to give anyone the title of being a “bad person”?
The stereotyping of a group of people is something I’ve never been able to do as I’ve been stereotyped against my whole life and will never bring that upon anyone else. It’s the same as being called something you’re not simply because you are misunderstood. You can’t blame people for misunderstanding if they have never been taught, but the best thing you can do is teach them in that moment as to allow them a better understanding.
Every time I hear someone say they don’t like someone because of a life choice they make, I question their thinking process with, “why should that have anything to do with who that person is?” I don’t understand how it can be so hard for people to dissociate others from their sins. They see them do something they don’t agree with and somehow think “Oh they’re a bad person.” But people are not their mistakes or their habits.
Especially recently, I try to focus on the good in people. It is hard for me to think someone is a bad person based off of a life decision that they’ve made or continue to make. I’ve come to notice that everyone has redeeming qualities in them that make them beautiful in their own way. It’s easy to look at the world as an awful place– it can be. But I try to look at it optimistically because I’ve seen how wonderful it can be.
In one of my favorite films, The Dark Knight, the morality and goodness of people is tested and studied by the greatest villain of all time, the Joker. In every one of his experiments, people turned against one another and killed each other over decisions they felt like they had to make. This supported his theory that he was trying to prove– that all people are bad and will choose evil given the right circumstance and if the right amount of pressure is applied.
However, there is a scene where people are trying to leave the city due to the chaos in Gotham, on two separate boats; one with the prisoners, and one with the citizens. A bomb was planted in each boat and a remote to set off the other boat’s bomb was placed on a wall. In order for one of these groups of people to survive, they must kill the other group. If neither of them actives the other ship’s bomb, they both die.
Now. I know this is dark- but it’s run off of the Joker’s thought process. He expects either the citizens to blow up the prisoners ship because prisoners don’t deserve to live over them- or he expects the prisoners to kill the citizens because they have no morals. Consequently, both groups of people die with this logic.
But as it turns out, The Joker was wrong. Even though the situation given was crucial, neither of the groups could kill each other. In fact, one of the prisoners took the remote and everyone around him suspected he would blow up the citizens ship, but instead, he threw the remote out the window.
With the comprehension that the prisoners wouldn’t kill the citizens, the citizens couldn’t kill the prisoners either. To Joker’s surprise, both groups were willing to die rather than killing one another.
This is my favorite scene in the movie because it is the first time that the groups find their humanity and value other lives other their own. Through this scene, we find that everyone has good in them– whether they be a prisoner or a law-abiding citizen.
This is not to say that you should always let the good overshadow the bad, but at least try not to let the bad overshadow the good– because if everyone has good in them, then they are human just like you.
Now for the closing: The question in the title asks if bad people really exist. First of all, you have to realize the difference between diseased mind and an evil mind. Also, the situation in which the sin committed should always be considered as should the question of “Are they a bad person? Or was the situation which they were placed in bad?” Anyways, to put it plainly: there are most definitely bad people in the world. But I know for a fact that there are more good people than there are bad, and with that in mind, it is up to you to decide if someone is bad or not. But keep in mind: don’t let one bad thing about them distract you from seeing them as a person that has good.
Thank you for reading:) I hoped you enjoyed this post and I hope you have a wonderful month.
Recently, I stumbled upon an article bywriterspractice.com. The article is about writer’s burnout: what it is, how it happens, and how to overcome it. Before reading this article, I had never heard of writer’s burnout, but it 100% described what I am going through. The article describes it as “looking at the page, hating the page, and questioning your entire identity as a writer, all for an extended period of time” which puts exactly how I’ve been feeling into words. Honestly, writing in general has been difficult for me lately, and I have been rethinking my entire life because I feel so lost and confused. The steps the article lists to overcome writer’s burnout really helped, and they are as follows:
Recognize the Problem
“You can’t move on without first recognizing that maybe something is wrong. Have you ever thought, ‘I just have nothing to say, no words to write.I don’t care about writing anymore. I have no new creative ideas. I never want to write again.’If so, you might be going through a writer’s burnout.” In the process of NaNoWriMo, I felt like a failure. Every day, I’d wake up, pull out my laptop, and swear I was going to make progress. Instead, I stared at that stupid, blinking bar for hours on end, before finally closing my laptop to hide under my mountain of blankets, as if hiding would make the shame and disappointment disappear. As someone who is somewhat of a perfectionist and planner, I try to be in complete control of all things in my life, but with this project, I felt totally out of my element. I’m not a novelist, and I never claimed to be, but maybe that was the problem. I think I went into this assignment with the wrong mindset. I went in not believing in myself, and I think I set my own self up for failure.
Don’t Stop Writing
“Write through the toil. It’s the only way to get to the other side.” I did it; I stopped writing. I gave in to the burn out and fear of imperfection, and that was my second mistake. I get so caught up in wanting everything I put my name on to be the best that I forget how to just write. It’s so tiring trying to be perfect all the time, but I feel so much pressure to do so. I often say, “If it’s not the best or it’s not perfect, why even do it?” I have slowly come to the realization that that isn’t the best mentality to have, but I’ve had that mindset for so long that I just don’t know how to break it. I should’ve pressed on. I should’ve followed through with my daily goals instead of simply avoiding them in fear not being good enough. Sometimes, I think, you just have to do the things you dread in order to become stronger and better.
Find Yourself (again)
“When you’re feeling lost in your writing, try taking a moment to remember who you are as a writer, and more importantly why you write. Remember your audience, your message, and most importantly, your voice.” As much as I hate to admit this, I have lost myself as a writer. I can’t even remember why I started writing or why I love(d) it. Last year, I had so much passion and drive for writing and for literary, but now, everything seems so bleak. I don’t know what it is, but I can’t seem to find that spark that I once had. I’ve lost my voice, and I don’t know how to get it back, but I fear I’ve lost it forever, which breaks my heart.
Don’t Try to Explain Yourself
“It’s a complicated and messy thing to try to explain why you set aside your most important projects. At first, even you might not know exactly why you had to switch gears, and that’s okay.” I struggled with this a lot during NaNoWriMo. During the break, for my story, I talked to women, including my own mother, about their struggles with infertility and pregnancy loss. I heard some of the most moving, emotional, and inspiring stories. I thought that because I had taken the initiative to get these real-life stories that I’d be more enthused to write this story, but instead I felt inept. I couldn’t figure out how to translate such important, powerful stories into my own writing, so I didn’t. I worked on other things, so I could say I had a productive day, but when my fellow writers were sharing their daily goal accomplishments, I was shoving my head deeper into my sheets. I felt embarrassed to tell them that I hadn’t made much progress in my story, so I countered it with the fact that I’d been working and that my home life is crazy, which isn’t false, but I felt the need to explain. I felt like I’d let them down, but really, I had let myself down.
NaNoWriMo is not for the weak, and for most of the month, I considered myself weak, and even writing this feels like a cop-out. However, in writing and reflecting on the month, I realize that while writer’s burnout is a thing, and I have definitely been experiencing the struggles of it, I am not defined by a word count or an assignment. My self-worth should not be determined by whether or not I adequately completed something, and I should stop holding myself to these impossible standards. I’ve always wanted to be a writer, and I am. To be a writer, means to write, so I’m gonna do just that. I’m gonna write every day, and I won’t worry about meeting a word count or completing an assignment that I don’t care about. I’m just going to write simply because it makes me feel good, and maybe, in that. I will overcome this writer’s burnout, and find my voice again.
