Worst Night Of My Life (Unfinished)

This is a snippet of a much longer story that's not entirely fleshed out. Cheers!

I stumbled blindly through the yard, the open door swinging behind me, and everything was too loud.

“Nicky!” Sarah Ann called, joy ringing through her voice like a bell calling for its dog. “Where you going, Nicky?”

Punch dribbles from my hair, my shirt clings to my skin, and every breath I take feels like I’m gonna die.

“Is that even your name? Nicky?” She yells. “Because what I heard—”

“I don’t care what you heard!” Even I could hear the tremor in my voice, the way every piece of me rattled as I scrambled my way into the woods with my hands quivering and my chest filled with wasps. “Just leave me alone!”

I didn’t want to be here, I didn’t want to be anywhere, I couldn’t breathe right as everything was pounding on my skull like a drum and my chest was bashing itself in like the world was coming to an end and this was my final soliloquy.

I kept everything straight, had all my accounts locked, not even my best friends knew, so what could’ve tipped her off? How did she find out? Did she get into my phone? She got into my phone, and she saw it, that’s what happened. I don’t get to keep a single secret, and I trusted her, I really did trust her, why am I so stupid?

I should’ve realized I would’ve gotten lost when I started running through woods that weren’t mine. This wasn’t my house, this was some stupid dumb party I decided to go to and now I’m stuck here.

By now the wind was starting to get to me, and I knew I couldn’t run much further, so I stopped, the tired burn of my legs and the shake in my hands just another part of the noise.

“Nick?”

He found me. I didn’t turn around.

“I don’t wanna talk right now.” My voice cracks. “So don’t make me talk right now.”

He didn’t say anything. For once.

But I couldn’t, as my head ran a thousand different ideas about how I’m gonna die and how this is gonna kill me. “You’re not gonna fix this, Gray,” I said. “I don’t even know if you can fix this.”

I collapsed against a tree, my laughter hollow and my voice broken. “I know what’s gonna happen. The school finds out, calls my parents, and I’m out of Westerfield by next Tuesday. Or they’ll just call me—”

I stopped myself.

He didn’t follow up on that. I guess he knew he couldn’t. Instead he mutters, “I was worried you were gonna come out here and do something stupid when I saw you running.”

“With what?”

“I dunno..” He kicked up dirt.

“Well, I wasn’t, so.” I shrugged. I said it just to get him to leave, but he didn’t. I didn’t know why I wouldn’t just tell him to leave; it was like I couldn’t. Maybe I knew I would be alone if I did.




Go Visit Your Local Library

Local libraries are an incredibly important aspect to our communities and access to public information while also becoming an increasingly endangered species. And it makes sense! Why would we use libraries when compared to computers and smartphones, they do comparatively less?

Why, when I have my information right at home?

Problem solved, libraries already have computers, but that doesn’t really answer our question, the question why should we use libraries? Free things.

Honest to God, best answer. Public access to books, computers, and records is so important, something the library not just supports but is. It’s built on giving those without access, access to resources. The poor, uneducated, ostracized, anyone who needs it. The library is what the foundation of the internet is. But rocking the boat is gonna be the easiest wrench for people to get in and start restricting that kind of knowledge.

But that’s a case for why we need libraries to exist and how important they are. But why would we use them?

And honestly, I’m not gonna hide it, I’m an avid library enjoyer. Have been since childhood. And man, the library has been like such a positive experience in my life? It just fosters such a friendly environment, with librarians who make polite conversation with you, finding quiet space, and depending on what your experience looks like, making friends.

I can’t tell you how many days I’ve bonded with people at the library even if I never saw them again. Strangers of all kinds, the library is a hub for those types of people, whether they just be passersbys or regulars you’ve come to recognize.

And hey, closing statement: my opinion is not yours. Do whatever you want. Libraries are just a quiet space for people to hang out, and I’m entirely biased. But I’d recommend visiting once or twice. Keep the library system alive and all that. It can do wonders.

The Warden

It’s been a couple years since you played Minecraft, but hey, you bought the game. What do you wanna do first?

Mine? Okay!

Let’s go down a couple Y levels.

You’ve mined below stone into deep slate at this point. It’s taken you a while, but you’re not very afraid. It’s still the same experience; you’ve been going through caves and making tunnels, but then you start to find these blue blocks. They’re really dark and look like a fungus, it must be a new update. You mine through. They drop a lot of XP. Sweet!

The entire area is shrouded in dark blue. I’d watch my step if I were you.

You take a couple careless steps forward. Nothing out of the ordinary.

You hear a sound you’ve never heard before to your left. What?

You don’t see what activated it, so you keep exploring. He’s not here yet.

You don’t hear the sound again, thankfully, and eventually get bored, take your XP and leave. You might come back later.

 

Congratulations! You’ve just avoided an encounter with The Warden! Presumably, if you would’ve run into it, The Warden would’ve immediately killed you and you’d lose all your stuff, but I’m here to explain how to not make that happen.

To preface, The Warden spawns in deep dark biomes, approximately anywhere below Y Level 0 and under a mountain. It has two types of attacks, ranged, and upfront. Ranged is what usually kills you.

When you are confronted with The Warden, you will notice cannot see players, only hear them, so any noise you make is to your detriment. If he does not find anything, he will start sniffing the air, and any nearby mobs, (including you,) he charges on sight.

The Warden doesn’t spawn the same way the Dragon or the Wither does. It’s invited. He spawns at the sound of four sculk shriekers, and if you’re not careful and counting for shrieks, you’re going to set it off. The sculk shriekers react to another block, sculk sensors, who vibrate if they detect noise or lots of movement, same as the Warden. Your goal is not those guys however, your goal should be the shriekers. Break them as quickly and as quietly as possible. Both blocks are going to be scattered all over the place, but they will be in range. You do not want to be loud.

By not setting off a shrieker, you should be able to get around the deep dark without much hassle.

But if you do manage to set off a shrieker four times, well.

You have 6 seconds to run.

GIF taken from GeekFlare's article: How to Defeat the Ultimate Mob in Minecraft: The Warden (no relation)

 

Far From Noise: A Much More Quiet Game.

Far From Noise is sort of a bottle-nose game where the main premise is you, a girl presumably in her twenties is stuck on the ledge of a cliff after driving out to the coast, even as the game’s opening shot. Throughout the game, we never leave this ledge and are left alone with the girl, her thoughts, and the wildlife as she comes to terms with her situation.

As you are stuck in a car, the only choices you are offered are between different dialogue trains and how you want the story to unfold. Sort of like a visual novel, contained.

Being ‘stuck’ is a big theme in this game, as the main character is stuck not only physically, but in her life as well.

She’s come to a point as a young adult where she doesn’t really know where to go, but she can’t go down and she can’t go up. It kind of ponders the question, if you were at the end of your life, but you had time to just think, take in the world around you, what would happen?

The game doesn’t shy away from the fact you are about to die; it’s one of the main focuses of the story. But despite the setting and liminal environment, the game is incredibly calm. Just to be put simply. It takes you seriously, and it takes its message seriously, but there are many jokes to break tension or small laughs thrown in.

It evokes something simpler; that’s all it really needs. Because throughout the certain death and the existentialism, you’re taken slowly on a journey through this character and what her life means. And sort of, what it means to be alive.

The game doesn’t ask a lot of you, as you play it. It’s only about an hour worth, I think. And if you can’t sit around for a slow-paced, low mechanics narrative, or you hate existential stories, this game isn’t for you. That’s okay.

But if you have time to sit down on a Saturday and set aside one to two hours worth of this game or something quiet and philosophical, I’d recommend it. Like I said, it’s not a lot, but it doesn’t need to be.

Minecraft’s Most Useless Mob

Got a much longer essay in the works so let’s divulge into something stupid!

 

Defined by the Minecraft Wikipedia, “a mob is an AI-driven game entity resembling a living creature. The term “mob” is short for “mobile entity”.” There are passive, neutral, and hostile mobs each within a biome, along with the two (possibly three) boss mobs: the Ender Dragon and the Wither. While the list is most made of mostly animals, villagers and witches also count as mobs.

Many of these mobs are very helpful and impact the game in a positive way.

But not all of them can be perfect. Many of them can end useless contributions. And that’s okay! But what happens when one of them is just an absolute waste of time.

What happens then?

 

Enter: The Horse.

Now, the Horse is a fine mob, genuinely. It doesn’t do much; except that’s the entire problem! If you spawn in a green biome, as opposed to a Snow or a Desert, you are very likely to find a Horse. Good! However, if you are not in a green biome, good luck finding one as they are only in plain and savannah biomes. And then, if you’ve found your plain and Savannah biomes, congratulations!

Now you have to ride one.

 You would think riding one is simple, right? You right click, or press X, I don’t know what console you’re using, and you should be riding one! Good to go!

Not even close.

First, you have to be Accepted by the Horse. Doesn’t seem that difficult. If you are lucky, there may be 4-5 generated in your biome. But if you are unlucky, there is only one. And that one Horse has a 50/50 chance of accepting you as its rider. If you don’t get accepted, you may be stuck hopping off and on and off again until it changes its mind, and if it doesn’t, sucks, next biome!

But let’s say, for the sake of argument, the Horse does accept you, and you have now Tamed Your First Horse. Great! But when you press A or D, your Horse won’t budge. That’s because you still need a saddle. It’s basically the only way you’ll gain control of your Horse.

Now, I don’t know about your Minecraft experience, but I found saddles very rarely. Very rarely. So, upon finding your very own Horse, the chances of riding her within the next week are already unlikely if you didn’t have a saddle before taming her. Which I didn’t. So, if you want to ride your Horse, your only chance of having anything to do with it is finding one of those.

But hey, maybe you’re luckier than me! Thank goodness because now, you have completed all three steps to taming a Horse:

  1. You found a Horse,
  2. You tamed a Horse,
  3. You saddled a Horse.

Now you may negate exhaustion and cut quicker across your world by—

What?

 

Oh. Okay.

At least they’re faster than a mine cart; notoriously, one of the slowest modes of in-game transportation.

And you need a hay bale to max out their health?

 

Or a gapple? (One of the most valuable items in the game)

Yeah, alright.

To cut my insanity short, even if horses aren’t a terrible mob they just waste your time. Just put a boat on packed ice. Oh you don’t know how to do that?

Just walk.

all information taken from the Minecraft Horse Wiki; may contain Horse slander or untrue facts about Horses

 

Contact

This is a poem about healing, reaching out, and the path to recovery. This poem contains depictions of depression via the speaker’s environment.

 

  1. The floor is invisible beneath the piles and piles of clothes forming a moat around your bed, on which you haven’t moved. Your arms, your legs, your body is a thousand tons, the weight of a herd of elephants, you won’t be getting up any time soon. The used-to-be-purple-now-gray t-shirt clings to you, it’s gross, terrible, you haven’t changed for a new one, but you know it’s nothing compared to the rats living in your fridge that hasn’t been cleaned out since September. (You’ll just let them have the food.) Your phone buzzes. You don’t look. No one needs to worry about you right now or hear from you. You’re fine. The room is fine. You’ll deal with it tomorrow.

  2. Today, you left your room. Not a lot. It was just the fridge. It hasn’t started to smell (yet) but you don’t remove the food inside. In the back of your head, you know it will spoil, but the hand stays right where you left it. As you mull over this, a bug crawls under the space between the floors. (You close the fridge.)

  3. The TV hums in the back of your ears, on it there’s a man named Jim and his girlfriend “Pam,” and a Schroot or whatever. You just needed something quiet. Tonight, you’ll have a TV dinner because there’s else to eat. Tomorrow you’ll Doordash. (Or not.) It’s going to be the most depressing thing you’ve eaten in months.

  4. Someone knocked on your door today. Whoever they were didn’t stay; but they left a care package. Inside, there’s a bag of fruit, a blanket, a bottle of bubble bath, and a green shirt with the tag still on.
    “I hope you’re doing okay.”

  5. You took a bubble bath that night.

  6. There’s still not enough energy in you to go outside, but Doordashing is too expensive. You take a fruit from the basket. Tomorrow you’ll clean out the fridge.

  7. It’s a disgusting and tedious process, exactly how you expected. You don’t do it in one go: not everything’s gone. But it’s a start. You’ll watch The Office that afternoon. (His name is Schrute.)

  8. Your phone buzzes.
    “Hope you’re doing better.”
    It buzzes again.
    “We miss you.
    You mark it as important.

  9. The green shirt you’re wearing feels better than the used-to-be-purple shirt. You feel clean. It’s nice.

  10. You load your laundry into baskets. You’ll take it to the laundromat in time. Right now, you’ll sweep the floor. Put trash in bags. Mop.
    Have you seen your floor since August?

  11. You take a bubble bath that night with the leftover solution.
    Tomorrow, you’ll go grocery shopping.