I was going to write a blog about the Punk community and continue that discussion, but I want to talk about something a bit different. I feel inspired to talk about the year overall and how I have been feeling recently.
It feels like summer is almost here and I am so happy for that. I’m really excited for summer and to have a bit more free time to decompress. I am really excited however for senior year. This has made senior year be a big topic of my thoughts as of lately and I have been thinking a lot about what I want my senior year to be.
I know it’s kind of cliche to want a good senior year and everything, but I do. I want it to be fun and full of life. I want it to be full of creativity and motivation. I want it to be free of drama, and I want to be content with how my high school career ends if that makes sense. I want to be able to say I did what I wanted to do at the end of the many years of school. I want to be able to say my senior year was fun.

In my eyes I see senior year as a different thing completely really. Maybe I have put it on a pedestal that it will never live up to, but I think a senior year should be full of activities with friends and it should feel like a weight being lifted because you are finally done with a chapter in your life.
I am really hoping to have a great senior year and look forward to what it brings. I want to kind of talk a bit about what I want to do senior year almost as a bucket list if you will.
The main thing I am working toward for senior year is to win a few writing awards and submit a few IE’s (individual events) for MTA and Thescon next year (theatre competitions I go to every year). I have always wanted to advance with my IE’s but have never really had the motivation or time. I am going to ensure I have enough time to perfect them I am going to work with them over the summer.


I also want to have a car senior year. I think that is one thing that is essential for a great senior year anywhere. With a car you can hang out with friends more sporadically and travel a bit more. These are things I think define a senior year.

I also think senior year is the most motivating time in a lot of people’s lives and sometimes the most productive. You are finally at the finish line, and you only have a little way to go so people are able to push through it without so much friction due to the light at the end of the very long tunnel. So that is what I want it to be to me in a way. I want it to be laid back yes, but I also want it to be a time of growth and hard work. I want to work really hard and get what I am working towards. I want to be able to have the balance a lot find senior year as far as fun, school, carefreeness, stability, and just overall contentment.
I think to0 have these things though there comes a lot of work and preparation. So, I am making a decision to plan over the next few days and then during the summer work really hard during that break period to get where I want to be. I am going to overview my plan here to give you an idea of my plan.

I am planning to get all of my submissions (writing and theatre) prepared or at least roughly planned out as a strong idea or have a good grasp of it over the summer as well as plan a trip for senior year of the summer after senior year. I think a trip would be really fun and would help senior year truly feel like senior year. I am also planning to over the summer really tune into myself and who I am and what I want in life. I think that is a huge part of any year being good really, but I think this is a great opportunity to find myself. I also am going to reorganize my Spotify. My music is very important to me and so this is something that will definitely affect my year. If my playlists aren’t good, then life isn’t good lol. But overall, this summer I plan to really think. I want to think really hard and deeply about my art and why I do it. I want to find my purpose and find what it is that would truly benefit me as an artist whether that be in the writing world, music, theatre, visual art, media art worlds. I want to truly find a median between all of my artistic motivations and desires.
It is going to be hard, but I think it will be worth it.
P.S. Next blog will continue the information dumps about the Punk subculture.






Another thing about this documentary is how they are still trying to play off his death as normal. It isn’t normal and it certainly doesn’t add up. They say in the documentary that they believe he was mentally ill suffering from a manic-depressive disorder much like Jimi Hendrix and other artists during the time, but the disorder wasn’t well studied at the time therefore they couldn’t have known he had this disorder. I see it as playing it off trying to pin it on something that could happen and that is normal, but spoiler alert it was anything but normal. His last girlfriend, Joan Wasser, a fellow songwriter and musician was also in the documentary and gave a few stories about jeff but one that stook out to me was a story they told about Jeff’s later years. It was maybe a couple of months before he passed. He supposedly told her that he was seeing visions of the devil and had a dream that he had a brain tumor and died but while they were telling these stories the camera cuts back to Joan Wasser who says Jeff told her about seeing visions and talking to the devil but when she says this her face curls into an unusual and odd facial expression one that seemed like she was almost happy, like a smirk but more devious and odd, especially since she was talking about the death of her boyfriend. My theory about this wasn’t really clear at first and then I found out about Duper’s Delight. It is a condition when certain people involuntarily smile, smirk, or laugh while lying. The micro expression is brief and a brief second uncontrollable movement that in turn reveals true emotion. Sometimes they feel this smile or muscle movement happen and try to hide it by biting their lips or tightening their mouth which only makes the movement look like a guilty smirk. It comes from the dopamine someone gets from lying and then in turn getting away with it. The condition is also often associated with narcissism which is an interesting correlation especially in this circumstance. 























