{"id":7651,"date":"2019-12-18T09:37:30","date_gmt":"2019-12-18T15:37:30","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/blog.msabrookhaven.org\/literary\/?p=7651"},"modified":"2019-12-18T09:37:30","modified_gmt":"2019-12-18T15:37:30","slug":"i-may-be-more-mixed-than-i-thought-i-was","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/blog.msabrookhaven.org\/literary\/2019\/12\/18\/i-may-be-more-mixed-than-i-thought-i-was\/","title":{"rendered":"I May Be More Mixed Than I Thought I Was"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>So, a few days ago, I found a TikTok. It was very beautiful and hilarious and I became fascinated by this short, sweet video. In this clip, there was a gorgeous girl\u2013her name is Venus and she&#8217;s most likely legal\u2013and she was decked out in pony beads. She had a pony bead necklace, a million pony bead bracelets, and I think a pony bead mask. She had on this beautiful, crazy makeup that made her look like a concert fairy. She, alone, was very mesmerizing. But in the video, she does this&#8230;thing? She held her hand up to\u00a0 the camera and did a few hand gestures, all of which are appropriate. And, it just really fascinated me. Here is the video:<\/p>\n<div style=\"width: 540px;\" class=\"wp-video\"><!--[if lt IE 9]><script>document.createElement('video');<\/script><![endif]-->\n<video class=\"wp-video-shortcode\" id=\"video-7651-1\" width=\"540\" height=\"960\" preload=\"metadata\" controls=\"controls\"><source type=\"video\/mp4\" src=\"https:\/\/blog.msabrookhaven.org\/literary\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/12\/9306fd5a6a4359dbc2c76b1a49101e9d1.mp4?_=1\" \/><a href=\"https:\/\/blog.msabrookhaven.org\/literary\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/12\/9306fd5a6a4359dbc2c76b1a49101e9d1.mp4\">https:\/\/blog.msabrookhaven.org\/literary\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/12\/9306fd5a6a4359dbc2c76b1a49101e9d1.mp4<\/a><\/video><\/div>\n<p>Her @ on TikTok is theaphroditevenuss<\/p>\n<p>I literally have this saved to my phone. I just kept watching it, over and over and over again. I was entranced. But, it really got me thinking. What the heck is she doing? Why was she doing it? So, I took to Google and tried my best to explain to myself why I was so interested in this video. Everything I found completely engrossed me into this subculture. I just kept researching and reading and watching.<\/p>\n<p>Basically, she is a &#8220;Scene Rave Girl&#8221;. The thing she was doing with her hand is called PLUR, an acronym for Peace, Love, Unity, Respect. They&#8217;re the principles commonly associated with Rave culture. The bracelet she &#8220;traded&#8221; is commonly called Kandi. They&#8217;re made of pony beads and string. Honestly, finding this out made me more intrigued to this. So I started listening to rave music. The first song I listened to was Pretty Rave Girl by S3RL (the song in the video) and Eat Sleep Rave Repeat by Fatboy Slim, Riva Starr, and Beardyman. I found myself completely in love with these songs. The high energy, the\u00a0 beat drops, the crazy nostalgia that comes with this music. I was completely and absolutely head-over-heels with it. All of it. This made me feel crazy, because never in my life had I felt such a molecular connection with a bass drop, ya&#8217; know?<\/p>\n<p>This sent me whirling into an identity crisis. Do I want to be a &#8220;Scene Rave Girl&#8221;? Do I want to spend money on a festival where I can be in a crowd of sweaty bodies moving to a song that has practically no emotional value? Do I want to dress as if I send &#8220;Rawr XD ^-^&#8221; in text conversations? And the answer, sadly, is yes. I want to be a &#8220;Scene Rave Girl&#8221;. I want to jump around in a crowd of must and stank at the slight chance that I might become friends with another &#8220;Scene Rave Girl&#8221; and we rave together. I want to get dressed in crazy beautiful makeup that makes me look like a concert fairy. I want all of that. And that&#8217;s what ate me up most on the inside.<\/p>\n<p>Knowing this knowledge, I cried in the lap of my great friend, Chloe Russell. I sat on the floor beside her chair and laugh-cried myself into hysteria while Callie calmly chuckled at me. She began poking fun at me, I guess her way of making the situation better, and we giggled together. And, in this conversation, she told me I was a RSCO Girl\u2013a rave VSCO girl. That made me cry a little harder, because although it made no sense whatsoever, it fit. But her humor helped. And after that, I calmed down. I sucked up my tears and I got over it. Who hasn&#8217;t had a little identity crisis at some point before they turn 18? So, yeah. That&#8217;s it.<\/p>\n<p>Merry Christmas!!!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>So, a few days ago, I found a TikTok. It was very beautiful and hilarious and I became fascinated by this short, sweet video. In this clip, there was a gorgeous girl\u2013her name is Venus and she&#8217;s most likely legal\u2013and she was decked out in pony beads. She had a pony bead necklace, a million &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/blog.msabrookhaven.org\/literary\/2019\/12\/18\/i-may-be-more-mixed-than-i-thought-i-was\/\" class=\"more-link\">Continue reading<span class=\"screen-reader-text\"> &#8220;I May Be More Mixed Than I Thought I Was&#8221;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":51,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/blog.msabrookhaven.org\/literary\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7651"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/blog.msabrookhaven.org\/literary\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/blog.msabrookhaven.org\/literary\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blog.msabrookhaven.org\/literary\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/51"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blog.msabrookhaven.org\/literary\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=7651"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/blog.msabrookhaven.org\/literary\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7651\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":7664,"href":"https:\/\/blog.msabrookhaven.org\/literary\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7651\/revisions\/7664"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/blog.msabrookhaven.org\/literary\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=7651"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blog.msabrookhaven.org\/literary\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=7651"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blog.msabrookhaven.org\/literary\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=7651"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}