{"id":6001,"date":"2019-05-15T15:13:46","date_gmt":"2019-05-15T20:13:46","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/blog.msabrookhaven.org\/literary\/?p=6001"},"modified":"2019-05-15T15:13:46","modified_gmt":"2019-05-15T20:13:46","slug":"stream-of-unconscious-poets","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/blog.msabrookhaven.org\/literary\/2019\/05\/15\/stream-of-unconscious-poets\/","title":{"rendered":"stream of unconscious poets"},"content":{"rendered":"

I turned fifteen eighteen years ago today. I forgot to call the cops about the horse that stood on my birthday cake. My sister burst a pinata with the tip of her nose and my brother pooped in a spoon and gave it to my dog to bury. <\/span><\/p>\n

Next was the sack race. I ate popcorn and elephants prior and it didn’t sit in my stomach so well. I sack raced into the grand canyon but before I fell too far my mom caught me with her one arm that grew several feet longer than the other. My dog then dropped the spoon full of poop. <\/span><\/p>\n

I rubbed myself down with sandpaper until I bled pink bubble gum. I taste tested it and sure enough it tasted like the whale I had swallowed whole only seconds before my tenth birthday. Under my tongue there\u2019s a marble made from a cats puked up hairball. <\/span><\/p>\n

My dog built my whole house the day he miraculously grew thumbs, which is a miracle, considering my family lived on the streets as jugglers. My dad ate my homework after he scooped up the guts that fell from my pinata. When I told my teacher she laughed and said \u201coh, happens all the time!!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

That year I wanted to be a pirate. I stole one from the sea and shoved him up my shirt. It was needed to protect him from the sand (he had a bad allergy) <\/span><\/p>\n

I pulled a snail from behind my ear. He told me I really needed to bathe. I nodded and handed him to my dog to use as a shingle for the roof. Next day, I cried into a lamp post until the light bulbs kicked me and told me I cried too loud.<\/p>\n

My sister never wanted to leave her home inside of a dead buffalo, however the swelling of the bloated skin and decay caused flies to claim the house for their own. She let them keep the couch.<\/p>\n

I kissed a roach on the mouth and he told me I was much better at it than his wife. My dad told me it was time to throw away the guts he had scooped from the pinata; it was making the roaches eat the ants.<\/p>\n

When the bees ate my dog I cried. The poor thing was horribly allergic, but married that stupid insect anyways. I stomped on her at his funeral. I pray the police don’t find me.<\/p>\n

It was a very interesting birthday.<\/p>\n

\n

I know you are thinking<\/p>\n

what<\/p>\n

was<\/p>\n

that<\/p>\n

and that is good because that is exactly the point. For my last blog post, I wanted to try something very out of the ordinary. This is a prose piece. You are welcome to interpret it anyway you want, but to me I think it outlines the ridiculousness and randomness of life. The whole thing can seem to be a lie sometimes, but you have to face it anyways.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I turned fifteen eighteen years ago today. I forgot to call the cops about the horse that stood on my birthday cake. My sister burst a pinata with the tip of her nose and my brother pooped in a spoon and gave it to my dog to bury. Next was the sack race. I ate … Continue reading “stream of unconscious poets”<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":39,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/blog.msabrookhaven.org\/literary\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6001"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/blog.msabrookhaven.org\/literary\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/blog.msabrookhaven.org\/literary\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blog.msabrookhaven.org\/literary\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/39"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blog.msabrookhaven.org\/literary\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=6001"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/blog.msabrookhaven.org\/literary\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6001\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":6025,"href":"https:\/\/blog.msabrookhaven.org\/literary\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6001\/revisions\/6025"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/blog.msabrookhaven.org\/literary\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=6001"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blog.msabrookhaven.org\/literary\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=6001"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blog.msabrookhaven.org\/literary\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=6001"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}