I’m so tired of writing pretty poetry, even though it flows naturally from me, words dancing from my fingertips to the page… But words don’t dance.\u00a0 And I’m tired of pretending that they do.<\/p>\n
Pretty doesn’t mean anything.\u00a0 Pretty is the bow that you put in your hair, a small nothing of decoration.\u00a0 And pretty words are the things people put on Instagram pages so that others think that they’re deep.\u00a0 I don’t want my words to be pretty; I want them to mean something.\u00a0 I want them to punch you in the stomach and give you cold sweats in the morning as they haunt you.\u00a0 I want them to give you nightmares like they do me.\u00a0 I, myself, don’t want to be pretty;\u00a0 I want to mean something.<\/p>\n
And when I die, I want to be remembered for something other than being pretty or having pretty words.\u00a0 I want to be ugly in the casket, not dressed up even a bit.\u00a0 I want to be decaying and rotting, and have them look upon me.\u00a0 They’ll call it an ugly sight.\u00a0 Maybe I’ll give them a smile.<\/p>\n
Actually, I don’t know what I want.\u00a0 I don’t know what I’m doing.\u00a0 I don’t know who I am.\u00a0 I don’t know anything, except that I’m scared.<\/p>\n
I can’t particularly name anything that I’m scared of.\u00a0 I just know that I do daring things, and it doesn’t faze me, but somehow I’m shivering in fear all of the time.<\/p>\n
I don’t know what I want.\u00a0 Actually, I want to be alone for a month.\u00a0 I want to wander into nothing towns with a bunch of nobodies.\u00a0 Then I wanna go to the landmarks, and even though most call them booming cities, I’ll think of them the same as the nothing towns.\u00a0 I want to sleep for eight days of that, a mini-coma.<\/p>\n
I’m tired of this place.\u00a0 I want to leave.\u00a0 And that includes Diamondhead and Brookhaven, two compound word nightmares.<\/p>\n
I feel as if perhaps, even though I’ve spent my entire life trying to outrun it, my only home is mediocrity, for that is where I rest my head every night.<\/p>\n
I’m tired, and I’m apathetic, and I’m tired, and I’m angry, and I’m scared, and I’m so scared.\u00a0 That’s it.\u00a0 There’s no real pretty way to put it.\u00a0 I’m just angry and scared.\u00a0 And I don’t have to explain myself to you.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
I’m so tired of writing pretty poetry, even though it flows naturally from me, words dancing from my fingertips to the page… But words don’t dance.\u00a0 And I’m tired of pretending that they do. Pretty doesn’t mean anything.\u00a0 Pretty is the bow that you put in your hair, a small nothing of decoration.\u00a0 And pretty … Continue reading “Pretty Poetry”<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":28,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/blog.msabrookhaven.org\/literary\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1290"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/blog.msabrookhaven.org\/literary\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/blog.msabrookhaven.org\/literary\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blog.msabrookhaven.org\/literary\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/28"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blog.msabrookhaven.org\/literary\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1290"}],"version-history":[{"count":7,"href":"https:\/\/blog.msabrookhaven.org\/literary\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1290\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1460,"href":"https:\/\/blog.msabrookhaven.org\/literary\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1290\/revisions\/1460"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/blog.msabrookhaven.org\/literary\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1290"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blog.msabrookhaven.org\/literary\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1290"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blog.msabrookhaven.org\/literary\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1290"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}